How To Screw Yourself Over

Chapter 1.4: Mutilating the Wolf

"Liu Han," Yin Hui whines, "I don't want to walk anymore. My feet are tired."

If Ash considers the distance they've traveled, she supposes the girlie's complaint is justified, but if she also takes the girlie's cultivation level into account, it isn't. Yin Hui is freakishly strong. She's like the little girl in those creepy games who twirls around a battle axe twice her size on one palm.

Sensing a perfect opportunity to bring pain and suffering upon one of her companions, Ash butts in with an innocuous smile adorning her features. "If that's the case, why don't you carry her, Liu Han? We still have quite the amount to go, so stopping now wouldn't be advisable."

He whips his head around to stare at Ash in disbelief. "Feng Yun, what have I ever done to you?"

Raising her eyebrows, Ash fixes him with an unimpressed look.

He falters, remembering how he beat up Feng Yun, and then chuckles nervously. "Right, sorry. Bad question."

Yin Hui, deciding she's been ignored long enough, completely disregards the stiff atmosphere to coyly ask Liu Han "Hey, hey, can you really carry me?" With misty eyes, the girlie shifts her weight anxiously before she pitifully murmurs, "My ankles are sore..."

Nicely played. Ash is getting a little bored with this scene though. Maybe she should fish for more information?

Once Yin Hui is firmly placed on Liu Han's back, Ash decides to strike up a conversation with the pair. She could find out their backgrounds from 078, but hearing their perspectives on the matter is usually more entertaining than listening to a bland report.

"Where are you two from? I'm a little curious. This might be a bit late, but I'm also curious about the girlie's name. You two don't address each other as much as I thought you would."

"Oh, I didn't realize she didn't introduce herself. This one," Liu Han pauses to point at the girlie whose attempts to rub her meager assets on Liu Han's back are actually pity-inducing, "is Yin Hui. She grew up with me in a little village near the border of A Country."

"The border? The border between A Country and B Country?" Ash repeats with feigned surprise. "Isn't it pretty dangerous there?"

Looking at Ash dubiously, Liu Han replies hesitantly. "It is somewhat dangerous, but we're heading to the Central Forest, the most dangerous place in the world so..."

Annoying. He misunderstood her response. Now he's either questioning her sanity or her knowledge.

"You misunderstood me. I've heard a lot of ruffians and bandits made that place their home so I was a little shocked a village exists there."

"Oh, that's what you meant." Liu Han thinks for a bit before replying. "A lot of bad folks seem to congregate in the area, but they tend to avoid us since our village has a bunch of former soldiers and warriors."

Boring.

Ash is extremely bored. Liu Han either doesn't trust her enough to provide any substantial information, or he's just naturally thick-headed. She's not sure which she prefers when her only options seem to be dense and dull or cunning and cheerful.

After mulling it over, Ash decides to settle with pestering 078 until they settle down. She really can't be at ease unless she's causing trouble. Chaos has always been her calling.

...

By nightfall, they've finally arrived at the Central Forest and start to pitch camp on the outskirts of the forest. Yin Hui has long fallen asleep on Liu Han's back, so he gently props her up against a tree as Ash lights a fire nearby.

Liu Han turns to Ash, saying "I'll take first watch. Is it alright if I wake you up halfway to dawn?"

Ash lightly tosses an affirmation in his direction before settling down on the branch of a tree, preparing to sleep. Ash is completely done with traveling. It is the epitome of boring. She sinks into the sweet abyss of sleep with those thoughts on her mind.

The next time she awakens, it's to the sound of menacing growls and ferocious snarls emitted by a colossal wolf leaping straight towards her. Rolling off the branch as fast as she could, she falls to her feet, ready to obliterate the foolish animal that disturbed her sleep. Swiftly extracting a dagger from her interspatial pouch, she lunges at the falling beast, stabbing through one of its eyes with frightening precision.

While it's distracted by the pain, Ash slashes at the animal's remaining eye without delay and effectively blinds the mutt. However, even with its lack of sight, the animal once again moves to attack Ash, still confident in its ability to slay her. Deciding enough is enough, Ash also darts forward when the wolf leaps at her and, in the few seconds it spends airborne, she jabs her dagger into the space between its ribs and slices its heart in half.

Dragging herself out from underneath the wolf, Ash can admit that attack was not her best idea. She hadn't been able to dodge quickly enough so she ended up pinned under about 5 tons of bony mutt. It wasn't pleasant.

After she cleans herself the best she can without simply replacing her clothing, she scans her surrounds, noting the disappearance of both Liu Han and Yin Hui. Recalling the plot, Ash figures the two are probably meeting Liu Han's contracted beast, the Azure Dragon, Zhi Ruo. To be more accurate, Liu Han is meeting the child while Yin Hui is probably passed out in Zhi Ruo's little dragon hoard.

Thinking about how long she'll have to wait for their return, Ash sighs and sits down next to the beast's carcass. In the meantime, Ash will probably just mutilate the massive wolf and attempt to figure out its biological structure. Wolves don't usually have legs as long as Ash is tall so she's going to try to discover what makes it different from the wolves she knew on Earth. Or she might just continue to stab it. It's somewhat cathartic.