All This Time (Destiel, Sabriel and Michifer AU)

A Destiel feels trip

*I don't own this video but when I found it and watched it... wow*

It turned out everyone decided that the next was a good time to leave, Sam decided to put off leaving for as long as possible, until he woke up and realised he was close to 13 hours after the original time he had planned to leave. 

So everyone decided that they should also probably get back to reality and began packing. Dean was planning on going straight to Lisa's after dropping Sam off at where his car was. Cas was noticeably quiet after Dean said this, and Sam tried not to give him the 'pity look' but he felt bad for the man. 

 Gabriel was hanging around Sam constantly while the moose tried to pack, he seemed to be trying to make up for lost time by spending every second with Sam. Literally every second. Sam was pretty sure that he wouldn't be able to go toilet without the golden haired man following him.

Still, Sam could understand Gabe's fears, he was scared of losing the shorty again too. So when Gabe ended up bowling him over onto the bed, snuggling into Sam's chest. Sam didn't get annoyed and just wrapped his arms around Gabe instead.

~ 

Dean, on the other hand, was doing everything in his power to avoid Castiel. It had become impossible for Dean to even look at the blue eyed boy without his heart breaking all over again. 

So instead he sat in his room alone, mindlessly finishing up packing as he hums along to the music playing through his phone.

"I loved and I loved and I lost you
I loved and I loved and I lost you

I loved and I loved and I lost you
And it hurts like hell
Yeah it hurts like hell."

Sure, it wasn't his usual stuff he liked to listen to, but Dean was in one of those moods, the one where you just want to mope about listening to emotional songs. He was ready to argue with anyone that tried saying he was having a chick flicky moment of course, but for now he moped.

"And pray to God he hears you
And I pray to God he hears you,"

Dean huffs, God wasn't gonna help him, he'd buried himself under all this mess when he chose to keep following his father instead of fighting for Cas.

"As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came."

Dean closed his eyes, only to see Cas's eyes behind his eyelids. His mind kept reminding him of the way Cas had felt in his arms. How it had felt to kiss him.

A memory of them hanging out before he left, while Sam and Gabe had been out together, sprung out of his cloudy memories.

'So Dean, what did you want to tell me?' Cas's head was tilted in that adorable way that he often did.

Dean held Cas's hand and pulled the blue eyed boy closer. Cas happily obliged, curling up onto Dean's lap and cuddling into his chest.

'I love you,' Dean murmured, tears pricking his eyes. 

Cas hums happily, pressing his lips against Dean's collarbone. 'I love you too Dean.'

Running a hand through Cas's raven black hair, Dean steeled himself. He had to tell Cas the truth, but after telling Sam earlier and watching the pain in his eyes, Dean wasn't sure he could do that to Cassie as well.

'Dean? Are you okay?' Cas looks up at Dean, worry in his eyes.

'I- my dad- we're leaving Cassie,' Dean's voice broke as he spoke.

Watching the way Cas's face frowned in confusion for a split second before slowly crumpling, his eyes filling with tears and heartbreak, was almost too painful for Dean.

'What?' Cas whispers.

'Dad's moving us again, and we won't be able to- to keep contact.'

Cas starts crying, clinging to Dean's plaid shirt and burying his face into Dean's chest. 

'I don't wanna lose you Dean,' Cas whispered.

'I know, I don't want to leave you,' Dean murmured, closing his eyes.

The memory fades and Dean rubs a hand over his face, trying hard not to let the tears roll down his face.

God dammit, he was so screwed and he had no idea on how he was going to fix it. 

He didn't hear Sam come in until he suddenly found himself being comforted by his little brother. 

"Hey, Dean, its okay," Sam was saying, patting Dean's back as he hugs him.

Dean wanted to push Sam away and claim that he was fine, like he always did, but he felt crippled by the pain of his loss. He had spent too much time pushing it down.

"I love him Sammy," Dean says roughly, his tears not slowly. He couldn't even remember when he started crying. 

He felt Sam hug him tighter, and felt so lucky to have his little brother in that moment, Sam was always there when he needed him.

They sat there for ages, Dean just holding onto his brother even after his tears subsided and his sobs faded. He clung to Sammy and willed his heart to stop shattering again.

What he hadn't noticed was the hidden, trench-coat wearing figure that had heard his confession to Sam.

~~~  
♡A/N♡

Hey all! So this is just a quick filler cause I finally got a new job (as a barista) and had my first shift today 😴😄

I'll post a longer, better chapter tomorrow after work!

Peace out, Wayward readers🌈😇🌈