All This Time (Destiel, Sabriel and Michifer AU)

Ben's first words

Sam sat with his back leaning against a tree trunk as he stared out across the calm lake. He clung to his empty beer bottle as if it were his lifeline. Everything seemed to be hurting. He was scared, heartbroken and really needing a strong dram of whiskey. 

Sighing, he let his head fall back against the tree. Hot tears tickle his cheeks as they start to fall. He had never felt pain like this before. His thoughts were filled of Gabe and Gabe only. It was then that he heard someone's footsteps approaching him. 

Dean sat next to him, not speaking. Just sitting. Sam couldn't look at his brother, instead playing with a twig, everything was blurry through his teary eyes. He was grateful though, Dean had always been there for him, Sam couldn't ask for a better big brother. 

Even now, as they sat there as adults, it was just like it had always been. Ever since they were kids, Dean could always tell when Sam was upset. And then he would be there, ready to do anything and everything he could to help Sam.

"Hey, Sammy." Dean laid a hand on Sam's arm. "It'll be okay, everything will be okay."

Sam couldn't talk, he just shook his head. Then, he broke down completely. Dean pulled him into a hug, and Sam clung to his brother as if he were a kid again, and let all his emotions out as tears. 

"It'll be okay Sammy." Dean whispers, hating the sight of his brother so broken.

"I-It's just, I l-love him, I fi-finally have him back and we we-were planning a life together-" Sam sucked in more air. "I don't wanna lose him."

"I know Sammy, I know."

Eventually Sam calmed enough that he could breathe again, and Dean lets him go. They sit there for a second, silent and still. Sam rubbed at his eyes, his breathing shaky. 

"Gabriel will be okay Sammy, don't stress too much over it jut yet, okay?"

Sam nods, feeling exhausted. He just wanted nothing more than to curl up with Gabe and nap. 

"Oh, and guess what, Jess should be here tomorrow morning."

Sam perked up a bit now, he hadn't seen his friend in months.

"So how about we head back now? Get you a refill on that beer."

Sam nods, letting Dean help him up. Then the two brothers start back towards the house, Dean watching his little brother with worry. He didn't want to think about what would happen to Sam if Gabe were to... die. 

When they got back to where everyone else was still enjoying the warm sun and water, Sam pauses for a moment looking at Dean. 

"Uh, thanks Dean." Sam rubbed at the back of his neck. "For, y'know, being there."

Dean shrugged it off. "No problem Sammy, just know that I'm, uh, here if you need me..." Dean coughed. "But hey, no chick flick moments, remember?"

Sam chuckles weakly. "Yeah, I need to check on Gabe anyway... go enjoy some time with Cas and Ben."

Dean nods, watching his brother disappear inside the house. Then, he turns and looks over at his small family as a warm feeling filled his heart. Cas had Ben sitting in the shallow water that was gently lapping against the sandy shore. The small boy had a look of pure delight on his face as he splashed at the water with his small, chubby hands. Although, his warm feeling was slightly marred by the memory of the last time they had all been here. Back when Lisa was still here... so excited at the prospect of bringing their unborn child here on more holidays.

He felt guilty, in a sense, being here with Cas and Ben while her ashes lay scattered elsewhere. Dead, unable to get to know her own son. But, at the same time, he knew that she would be happy that he was happy again. Because he was, truly happy, with Cas by his side. 

"De, you're back!" Cas grins up at Dean he reached them.

Dean loved those blue eyes. "Yeah, hope he wasn't too much trouble."

Ben made a raspberry noise at this. 

"What, Ben? Ha he's always good for me." Cas looked down at the boy for a moment, before his eyes return to Dean's. Now they filled with worry. "How's Sam?"

Dean sat down, pulling Cas into a tight hug. "Fine, for now. I'm scared about how he'll be later... if Gabe doesn't make it."

Cas doesn't reply. No doubt worried for his own little brother as well.

"I'm sure he'll be okay though, Gabriel's strong."

"Yeah," Castiel's voice broke. "I really hope he is."

Then Ben looked up at them both, his eyes wide and innocent. "Da-da?"

Dean ruffled his head affectionately, "hey Ben." Then he froze, looking at his son, who was now occupied with a small fish that had made the mistake of going near the curious boy. 

"Did he just... speak?" Cas asked, sounding amazed.

"He just said his first word," Dean said, grinning. "Oh my chuck he spoke." 

He lifted Ben up onto his lap, ignoring the boy's attempts to wriggle back down to the escaping fish.

"Say that again Ben, say Da-Da."

Ben wriggled, "Da-da, down! Down!"

Dean laughs, excited to have seen this major milestone of not just one, but rather two words. He followed Ben's demands though, setting him back down in the shallows and grinning with Cas. 

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A/N:

Next chapter I'll be making sure to put some Sabriel pranking in, more Michifer and cute Ben antics.

Peace out, Wayward readers 🖤💜