The Letters That Saved Her Life (sequel to Dear Niall {A Niall Horan Fanfic})

November 25, 2016

November 25, 2016

Jackie's POV

I found a phone I can use and dialed Niall's cell number in. It rang a few times before he picked up.

"I'm sorry I can't talk right now." He breathed into the phone. I hope I didn't wake him up.

"Niall, it's me."

"Oh. Hey babe. How are you? Haven't called in awhile."

"I know I'm sorry. Nick passed, then I had to tell Ashley, who I found out is a guy, then I had to tell his parents. Now today is the funeral. I'm carrying the coffin with Rick, Dylan, Jack, Eric, and Mike. Then I'm going to say a few words about him at the funeral home." I ramble to him.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I know he was your best friend. Are you sure you can carry it with your knee the way it is?"

"Ya, I'll be ok. Sure it'll hurt like hell, but I'll deal with it. I miss him so much Niall."

"I know you do. It'll get better, I promise." He sounds just as upset as I do.

"So I'm on my way to the funeral home and I just wanted to say hi and see how your doing." I change the subject before I start crying.

"I'm doing good. The guys are excited to see you, and I can't wait for you to come home. When are you coming home anyway?"

"Probably tomorrow, I'll call to let you know the time. Hey, I have to go I'm sorry. I love you."

"I love you too." I hang up the phone and pick up it up again to make sure it hung up. I head over to the funeral home. Walking in I see Ashley, Nick's mom, and dad standing next to the coffin. People are hugging them and giving their condolences to them. I got in line after signing in and taking one of the small cards. On it told some information about Nick, and a picture of him. One picture is of him, then on the other side is a picture of him and some army buddies, myself included. I'm in my suit again. We have to wear it to things like this. When I get to him he looks so peaceful. He's wearing a very nice suit with a dark green neck tie. He looks so different from the tee shirt and baseball cap wearing guy I knew. I went on to Ashley and hug him.

"I'm sorry Ashley."

"I'm sorry Jackie. Here." He hands me a small piece of paper. "It has my cell phone number on it. If you ever need to talk or anything, please don't hesitate." I slip it into my pocket.

"Thank you, and the same goes for you. I'll text you when I get home so you have my number. Also, you say sorry a lot like he did." He gives me a sad smile, then I go on to his parents.

"I'm sorry for your loss." I nod towards both of them. I find the guys. Of course their all sitting in the front row. Dylan and Mike get up to hug me. We sit down and wait for the service to begin. The pastor begins to talk. He talks about how Nick was a wonderful man. He was a loving son, husband, cousin, and friend. Then he gets to the part where people can come up and say something about him. I notice nobody else is getting up so I do. I pick up my crutches and walk to the podium, and the pastor steps aside.

"My name is Jackie Dunkle, and Nick is my best friend. Nick was the first person I talked to when I arrived at training camp. He has been my best friend ever since then, and he will continue to be my best friend." I pull out the folded up piece of paper. I look at Ashley before continuing. "When they packed up his stuff from his bed they found this piece of paper. You see, me and Nick were a lot alike. When we didn't know how to tell someone something we would write it down in a letter, then maybe eventually give it to that person. This one was addressed to me. If you don't mind I'd like to read it to you today." Ashley nods at me and I continue.

"It reads. 'Dear Jackie, You know I'm married. You know their name is Ashley. And you know that I love them very much. But there's something I haven't told you about them. Ashley is a guy. I don't know how to tell you because I think you won't be my best friend anymore. I think that you'd be disgusted that I love a man. I'm so afraid to tell you. I'v lost friends before because of my sexuality, but I don't want to lose you. I love you too much. I love you little sis. Love, Nick.'" I wipe a few tears away.

"It makes me cry because I'm absolutely fine with it. I actually always knew. When we first met Dylan, Nick would stair at his ass. I guess I always knew, but I just couldn't believe that he would think that I would love him any different. My older brother left when I was very little. I never grew up with a brother and Nick was like an older brother to me. I'll miss you bro. I love you." I go and sit next to Dylan again.

After the service Rick, Dylan, Jack, Eric, Mike, and I sat in the same car to carry the coffin. We got to the cemetery and the pastor prayed over him. We took an American flag and refolded it. We presented it to Ashley then shot off the guns. When we did the shooting ceremony I tried not to flinch too much. I stay to watch them slowly lower him into the ground. I wipe the tears from my face, put my hat back on, then head to the car. They take me right to the airport. I can't wait to see Niall.