It Gets Better// Perrie Edwards

For Ebony (23)

It's a bit bitty this chapter I apologise. I wanted to try a different format let's say before we get back to the regular chapters. 

No one's POV

Daily Mail: Little Mix have cancelled tour due to 'unforeseen circumstances'

Fans were devastated to learn Little Mix have cancelled their UK and European tour due to unforeseen circumstances. The girl's team released a short video in which their manager spoke about cancelling the tour in the wake of some unfortunate news. There's no news as of yet what that means but we hope the girls are okay.

This comes a few weeks after the group's Blondie, Perrie Edwards announced she was expecting a baby girl. 

In a recent interview, she explained how ill she had been with this pregnancy and detailed how she has a name ready for the little one. 

We hope everything is okay with her and will keep you posted on the news after it comes in

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'Heart broken'- Little Mix reveal the reason they had to cancel their tour.

Our hearts go out to Perrie Edwards, after her band mates revealed in a tearful video that she lost her baby girl 2 weeks ago. 

The video began with Jade thanking the fans for their patience. Then Jesy proceeded to tell the fans that Perrie had tragically miscarried her daughter 2 weeks before meaning they had to cancel the tour. Leigh-Anne asked for further time and space for healing and the video ended with a picture of the baby's shoes. 

Perrie, 23, had just recently announced the news was expecting a little girl in the summer and mixers were giddy with excitement about the first baby mix. The Baby, who's father was thought to be ex 1D member Zayn Malik, was the singer's first child and we are heart broken for her. 

Her team tweeted out, following the video message, 'understandably Perrie, her family and the girls are grieving and we ask that you give them some space in the coming weeks. We aren't certain about a reschedule of the tour but are hoping to have some information soon. Once again we are thankful for your cooperation in this upsetting time.' 

The fans have been sending their condolences and are showing their faith to the group, some even posting short tributes for the loved baby, containing images of Perrie throughout her short pregnancy. 

The girls haven't been photographed in public however they posted a picture showing a teddy bear with the caption Rest In Peace ERE. 

Our healing thoughts are with Perrie and hope she takes as much time to grieve as possible.

Check back here for more information as it comes in.

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Little Mix's Instagram.

The last month has been the hardest in my life. My beautiful Ebony Rose was born sleeping on the 2nd of April 2016. Somehow everything I thought I knew has changed. An what seemed like a distant nightmare has become a close reality. Every mother I had spoken to prior to my loss told me about the calm that falls over you when it is just you and your baby a few hours after they are born and I had the pleasure of feeling that with my Eb, even if it was brief. She was the light of my life, my sunshine on a rainy day and gave me a reason to carry on when I felt it would be impossible and I know that she is looking down on me wherever she is, continuing to be all of the before mentioned and so much more. It's not been an easy decision but I have decided to continue on the tour for you guys and most importantly Ebony, who I'm hopeful would want me to heal and in a way move on. Thanks for all of your messages, they really helped me get back on my feet. I'm not completely okay and I don't think I'll ever be, but I have learned I must live life to the fullest if not for me, then for my beautiful Ebony. Thank you all.

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"Welcome back to This Morning where we are joined by the beautiful, incredibly talented Perrie Edwards. Perrie thank you for coming today, this can't have been an easy thing to do." 

"No problem, it felt like time I broke my silence and I wouldn't have done it with anyone else."

"thank you so much, how are you feeling my love?" 

"I'm alright, today is a good day, it's busy which is just the way I like it, less time to focus on Eb."

"That's good, are you looking forward to going back on tour?" 

"yep, it's in a few days and I'm ready to get back to work, I miss the fans!" 

"I bet you do. Now if I'm not mistaken you have started a charity to help families who have miscarried, do you want to tell us a bit about it."

"Absolutely, so I started a charity called 'A few minutes longer' it provides neonatal and maternity wards in hospitals with a device called a 'cuddle cot'."

"Right and what is a cuddle cot?"

"A cuddle cot consists of 3 pieces, a bassinet, a cooling fan and the cooling pad itself. I was very fortunate when I lost Ebony because the hospital I was staying in had a cuddle cot which kept her skin cool and prevented it from decaying so I could have a little longer with her. The cuddle cot means that the parents of miscarried or still born children have the opportunity to have a bit more time with their babies before they have to go to the morgue. Deceased babies have very delicate skin and unless preserved it decays rapidly."

"So if the hospital had one why are you raising money to get more?"

"I attended a counselling group after I lost Ebony and I learned that a lot of hospitals don't have them because they simply cannot afford them so I set up 'A few minutes longer' in the hope that more mothers and fathers have the irreplaceable opportunities I was given."

"Amazing, how can people donate?"

"I have a just giving page that is linked on the website. You can find the web address in my Instagram Bio as well as in the description box of the video I posted about it."

"Fantastic. I was wondering if you could maybe tell us about what it feels like to loose a baby, I know you're keen to share your experience on it."

"Yeah, I think it's time to break the silence around miscarriage and show how strong women are. I found out I lost Ebony right before we were meant to go on tour. It was a routine check up but when they tried to find a heart beat they couldn't. They told me she had died a week previous, erm and I was completely shocked because I had been certain I had been feeling her flutter about but it turned out that what I was feeling erm was the early stages of a miscarriage. I was past the point of safe, natural miscarriage, so I was pretty much immediately rushed into theatre because she was causing me to have incredibly low blood pressure. If it hadn't been for the incredible team at London Bridge Hospital I would not be speaking to you today."

"And when did it hit you because I know in and Instagram post you stated it didn't hit you right away?"

"Erm I'd say it half hit me that I had lost her when I was going under but it wasn't until I was out of my operation that it really hit me and my goodness it hurt. I've never felt emotional pain like that. It's indescribable really, only other's who have gone through similar would really understand."

"How did you go about the healing process I know you're still healing now but how did it begin maybe."

"I tried to allow myself to feel everything I needed to feel. It's like when you grieve anyone, there are stages and each one is difficult. One of the things I did was meet with her father and talk about it with him, because as much as I had lost a baby, he had too even if his plan was to not be in her life. I gave him scan pictures and some of her clothes and that helped me to heal to because I know it's what Eb would have wanted. I also finished her nursery because I hope on day it will be filled with laughter. Another thing that massively helped me to heal and 'move on' as such would be the memory box I made. I filled it with her blankets and scan pictures, pictures of her hands and feet as well as a blanket my Mam bought for her. That was really important to do. I'll never be healed fully but I know that it will get a little better over time."

"Perrie thank you"

"No problem"