memories to live

BEFORE THE MEET

We reached Belgaum, the city where he is studying. We board a taxi towards college, finally the has come. It took around 15mins to reach his college, I don’t know the place where he stays, I’ve collected one of his friend number, I called him, his name is Abhay.
Me: hey Abhay, this is Mridul’s friend. Can I know where he stays?
Abhay: I don’t have any idea about you, can you be bit clear?
Me: I’m his friend Riya. I want to surprise him on his day, so I want to know where he stays.
Abhay: oh okay, I don’t how you got my number but I can help you out. Where are you?
Me: I’m in front of your college, can you just guide me to him?
Abhay: wait there only, we all are coming to college now.
Me: I need to fresh up, just now we have reached here. So, I’ll catch you later.

Me and Kowshik rushed to a near by hotel so that we can fresh up. We got the room within few minutes we are ready to meet him. When I entered Kowshik room he was still laying over bed, I really irritated me. I made him to get up and pushed him to get ready. I’m tensed, its been more than a year, I just sat there thinking of my decision and writing it in my diary.

The day had come finally, whatever the thing happens I’m ready to accept it. I’m here for you, I’m not going back without your love. I want to look in your eyes and say what you mean to me. give me thousands of reasons to stay away from me but I’m never gone hate you. if staying away from me makes you happy, I’m happy for that. Now, we know the pain separation, it made our love strong. I don’t want to prove myself because I know that you know me more than anyone. I hope this is day which ends all our pain. Its your day my love, my man, my baby, my everything. Whatever we had faced is all for good. I know you love me but just say it for a one last time I’ll take care of rest of the things. I promise you that I’ll never hurt your family, I promise you that I’ll be with you in your all up and downs. I promise you to give whatever you ask for. I have only one wish that is to spend rest of my life with you. there is a long list of to do things which we have from tomorrow onwards. I’m here for you, happy birthday my Shona. I don’t want to miss you anymore, within few minutes I’ll be in your arms. Let’s go for a long drive and celebrate your just as you asked. See you soon.

Kowshik called me after he got ready to go.
Kowshik: so, what you have decided now?
Me: I’ll talk to him and convince him.
Kowshik: convince? For what you will convince him?
Me: I’ll assure him that everything will be fine with us, we can be together forever.
Kowshik: do you mean that you are going to take the risk?
Me: no, nothing like that. See its duty of every person who stays in love should, maybe he is nervous because of his family. But he will stand with me and we are going to do this.
Kowshik: what if he disagrees?
Me: no, he will not, he loves me. he just need to understand the things.
Kowshik: its been a year, are you sure he still loves you?
Me: he loved me, and he had promised to stay with me forever.
Kowshik: promises are not true, they are rules to be in a circumstance. Think once more, maybe he have got someone else?
Me: no, its cant be like that. If so he wouldn’t have cared for me, every time he asks me to move on. he can’t replace me.
Kowshik: what if he had replaced you?

I stood there silently, I have no answer for all his questions. I have not answered any of his question with confidence, all I had done is finding a reason so that it’s a no. I can’t analyze the things on my own view but I can say nothing has went wrong because I love him truly and true love always wins.
I’d lived with a hope that he will come back to me, now I’m not ready to accept if he can’t. I have seen the life without him, hardly he had stayed with for five months but for the past year he had stayed with all my thoughts, dreams and everything.

Kowshik: look I’m not saying that he will not come back but I want you to have the courage to face anything. I don’t you to be weak, if he can’t just leave the things, accept the life and move on. I hope he will come back but I can’t assure you. I’m here with you because I want you to face the reality, I’ll help you only if you need. I know my sister is right and she is strong. Now let’s go.

Kowshik made me to understand the things, I’m lucky to have a brother like him. We went down to reception and asked the management to decorate the room for a birthday celebration and for a party. We walked towards his college with a bouquet in my hand. I’m quite modern because once he had asked me to be, a black jean with a white formal shirt, free hair. We reached there and I dialed Abhay number.

Abhay: be there near canteen, I’ll come with him.

I sat there, my eyes started to search for his arrival.