Shawn Mendes Imagines

Anxiety

{Shawn's POV}
This was my first time flying with Y/N, I've never told her about my anxiety when it comes to planes. I get panic attacks when we take off and sometimes throughout, especially when flying over the ocean. My biggest fear is the plane going down and being stuck in open water.

"You okay, bud?" Andrew asked me. I hadn't realised how heavy I was breathing until now. I tried my best to calm down, which only partly worked.

"Where's Y/N?" I asked.

"The bathroom. Calm down, kid. We'll be up in the air before you know it." He said and returned to his seat. Y/N sat down just in time for the seat belt sign to go on. We buckled ourselves in and my leg started bouncing up and down. Y/N placed her hand on my knee and looked up at my face.

"Are you okay, Shawn?" She asked.

"Yeah just a little nervous. It's no big deal," I lied with a chuckle. She nodded and pulled her hand away, I instantly wanted to grab her hand and place it back there but I couldn't.

The plane began to take off and I got even more anxious. I took deep breaths and fiddled with my fingers.

"Shawn, are you sure you're okay?" Y/N asked.

"Ye-yeah." I stuttered. She knitted her eyebrows together but continued to read her book. I began to panic so I grabbed Y/N's hand and squeezed it. She closed her book and placed it in her bag before facing me.

"Shawn tell me what's wrong." She said. I sighed and nodded.

"I get anxiety on planes. I know I should've told you about it but I guess I was just embarrassed, it's just a stupid fear." I said. She shook her head as tears pooled my eyes because of the turbulence.

"Shawn, baby this isn't a stupid fear. You can tell me anything, this is one of those things I need to know," she said. My breathing got heavy and the loud noises from the crying children weren't helping.

"I-I ca-n't-"

"Shawn you can't talk, you're having a panic attack." She said with a light smile. I nodded and covered my ears, it was like the walls were caving in. She grabbed her head phones and handed them to me. She played John Mayer as I leaned my head on her shoulder. She ran her hands through my hair which instantly calmed me down. I breathed at the same pace as her before my breathing was back to normal.

"Thank you," I said and handed her headphones back to her.

"It's alright. I don't want you to feel like you can't tell me these things, Shawn." She said softly.

"I know, I'm sorry. I just thought it would pass over but it...didn't." I sighed. She kissed my lips softly and pulled away.

"Please always come with me whenever I'm on a plane." I said. She smiled and kissed my forehead.

"Of course, now get some rest before your tour starts."