And When He Is Here // hayes grier

Chapter 10

↠Hayes

I kissed her. I know in order to stop panic attacks you have to slow your breathing, since she couldn't seem to do that, I slowed it for her.

She kissed me back. It was perfect. It felt perfect. I got butterflies in my stomach, who am I kidding, it's the fucking zoo. I wanted to stay here in this moment until the halls filled up with people and until our legs went numb from sitting on the cold tiles.

We both pulled back and she was calm. Her breathing was back to normal and she didn't seem so weak.

"How'd you do that?" she whispered. I thought about it for a second and I couldn't manage to think of how I came up with the solution, I just did. 

"When you hold your breath, it can stop a panic attack," I explained. For the life of me I couldn't think of how I knew that. "And when I kissed you, you held your breath." She looked at me and smiled. One of the most pure and sincere smiles she's ever given to me. "Come on let's go take care of your hand then go back to lunch."

She grabbed her lunch bag from across the hall and we began walking in one of the empty biology classrooms to use the sinks. After a good five minutes of scrubbing away blood, her hands were as clean as they were going to get.

"So what happened anyway?" I asked her referring towards the frantic locker punching.

"Uh- uh I don't really know. Like I was just looking at his locker and I just got so-so mad. I couldn't take it." She said finishing with a sigh.

"Oh. We'll it's good to release your anger. Some times that's all you can do." I told her. It was true. They say to talk everything out, voice your problems, let people know how you're feeling. But sometimes it just doesn't work that way, sometimes you have to punch a locker.

We walked into the cafeteria and sat down at our table. "Where were you guys!?" Joely nearly jumped out of her seat when she saw us.

"We had some stuff to take care of. We're good now though," B told them, and I was at ease knowing we had our own little secret.

They all just nodded and continued eating at talking.

When school ended, B and I walked to practice together, we had to split to go to our separate fields, and for a brief second I could feel her knuckles scabbing over when she let go of my hand.

At practice I couldn't focus. My mind was somewhere else. Bradie. I liked her. I knew it and couldn't even talk myself out of it, I couldn't convince myself otherwise, but I was okay with that. 

All the sudden I was hit with a ball in my back. "Hey!" I turned around and it was one of my friends, Kyle. "Pay attention bro."

"I'm trying," I mumbled and I looked over at the girls field. I saw B playing. I could barely make out who the other girls were, but I could see her clear as day.

After practice was over I ran over to bradie's field. "Hey, how was practice?" I asked her.

"Good. We scrimmaged and i would have gotten a yellow card if it was a real game because I hit a girl with my stick. I may or may not have been on purpose."

I laughed at her. "Who'd you hit?"

"Chelsea," she answered then she laughed. I knew she couldn't stand her.

"Wait, shouldn't we wait for Ryan?"

"No, that's okay. My mom is not even here yet so he'll catch up with us," I told her.

"Alright," then after a few seconds Ryan ran up to us

We all waited for my mom and she came. She was giving B and Ryan a ride home.

↠Bradie

Elizabeth was giving me and Ry a ride home. But it turns out it was Nash instead.

"Hey B you can sit in the front if you want," Hayes said

"Sweet, thanks." I felt like a prize to be won.

Nash gave him a shocked look. He looked to me then back at Hayes then to me again, "what's going on with you two? Hayes just gave up the front seat. He never gives up the front seat."

I laughed, "nothing. " But there was something going on, Hayes and I both knew it. Why hasn't he brought up the kiss yet? I enjoyed it. I really really enjoyed it.

I was hoping he was going to bring it up soon. Because I don't want to have to. Nash just looked at me suspicious and looked like he didn't believe me. I just shrugged.

We we got it me and Ryan's house I said bye to Hayes and Nash and thanked them for the ride
"I'll text you," Hayes told me as I shut the door.

"Okay, see you tomorrow. Thanks again, Nash."

Me and Ryan walked threw the front door. Our mom wasn't home so we had to make ourselves dinner. I ran up the stairs to go take a shower. I turned the knob to turn the shower on. I took off my dirty practice clothes and threw them in the hamper.

I stepped into the shower and let the hot water soak my skin. It felt really good. When I got out I patted myself dry and wrapped my self and hair on a towel.

I walked into my closet and I picked out some nike athletic shorts and a cut off t-shirt. I wore my sports bra underneath so you could see it.

I checked my phone to see I had 2 texts from Hayes.

H-Hey wanna come over?

H-We need to talk