We Fell Apart

Summer of Angela- Part 1

I met Angela in the fall of '05 when we were young and innocent, blissfully ignorant. There's no denying she had an almost angelic beauty even then. She always looked perfect, acted perfect amd enchanted every person she met.
Except me, I knew she was far from perfect. She was painfully messed up. Just like me. And that's why we were drawn to each other.

I remember the summer we spent together last year as the summer of Angela. Perhaps I remember it this way because of the way everything seemed to move in a different way with Angela; or more likely, maybe it could be that I saw her change so much and all the events of that summer became a build up to my self destruction. I never once blamed Angela for any of the mistakes she may have made during that summer. I never blamed her for changing either. I didn't blame her for being irresponsible, instead I just reflected on our actions.

That summer day seems so long ago. The day I met Kevin, the day...

"I'm hideous, aren't I?" Angela burst through to the veranda with a flurry of white curtains and perfume.The way she did that reminded me of a scene from the great Gatsby, the book I was currently reading. The curtains flew behind her and blew with the wind before settling. Patiently I put my book down and look up at her. Her long slim legs are in a tiny pair of white, ripped shorts and her foot which was in a small sandal was tapping impatiently as she waited for me to respond.
"New scent? " I ask innocently, ignoring her comment. This was our usual banter and something only we would understand. No, it's not an inside joke. It's just the way we were. Her dark eyes sparkle with amusement and she throws her black hair over her shoulders. "Let's do something, We never do anything. I'm not good enough, am I? "

"Angie I'm-"

"Is it because I'm so hideous you can't be seen with me? " she interrupts.

"Angela, you know perfectly well you're not hideous" I laugh

She moves across the veranda in an agitated manner, not waiting for my response. She goes first to the potted plants that were underneath the grand, white table then to the banister before leaning against it.

Everything with Angela was an adventure. The summer of Angela seemed to move too fast. Everything moved at a hypersonic, electric pace. I remember feeling worried about her at this point. She seemed to move faster than normal and she was almost always agitated as if she knew something I didn't. She couldn't have known then. She couldn't have known that we'd wreck our lives feeding off each other's careless mistakes.

"Get dressed Skylar ," She demands. I sigh and attempt to get up gracefully but I end up almost tripping over my multicoloured maxi dress. "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"

She gives me a measured look which in Angela terms meant: It's not as dramatic as I want it to be. Rolling my eyes I turn my back on her and walk through the door that she'd just entered from wondering how my dress that reached my ankles and had left a hole in my mother's back account was not to her taste. For Christ's sake, she'd chosen it!

"It's Light blue"" she calls after me. I look behind me and see her grinning with a cigarette in her hand.
"What?" I ask, sheildig my eyes from the light behind her, reflecting from the nearby ocean. It makes her currently blonde hair look eery and otherworldly.
"The scent"
She waves the cigarette at me signalling that I should hurry up. The smell of smoke wafts up from the veranda as I get changed in my room.

I can't remember what day very well. There are things I remember for certain like how after Angela signalled me to hurry up with a flourish of her cigarette, I changed into a pair of shorts that left my legs tan and my thighs pale, a black crop top before tying my hair and then leaving it loose again. I remember applying make up on my face and hoping it would look effortlessly natural. I remember grabbing my bag and walking out of the house with Angela. I vividly remember a blur of our parents credit cards, clothing, drinks and food and the California sun beating down on us as we walked onto the beach. But never will I be able to forget the moment I met Kevin. That moment is dangerously imprinted on my mind for a lifetime. I couldn't forget that moment even if I tried. But it was never about Kevin and the story of how we met is for another day completely.
***

"So this is what hanging out looks like these days? " my mom laughs as she walks in my bedroom door, her blonde hair tied in a pony tail to reveal her perfect bone structure. Her eyes dance in amusement as she takes in Angela and I lying lazily on my bed, phones in hands and in absolute silence.
Looking up, I grin at her "When did you get back?"

"I dropped by the office earlier today when I got back from Zurich," my mom smiles from the doorway. I translate that to: I went to Dray's house and spent two days there before coming home. There was no way she'd be this happy otherwise.

"And I'm glad I did, have you two been outside lately? You're lying there in silence on your phones."
"Amy, this is how we communicate now" Angela joked

My mom laughed and turned around to walk down to her room.

"Skylar, I want that bed made" she calls out and then almost as an afterthought "I'll make you get a job if you keep cleaning out my bank accounts."

Rolling my eyes, I continue banging away on my phone. Ready to ask if she wants anything to eat, I look up at Angela. She has a worried look on her face and she's staring at the blank screen of her cell phone. She zones out often so I don't worry too much but then I see her eyes glisten with moisture and she tucks a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear which is always a tell-tale sign.

"Angie?" I say softly.

She blinks and looks at me with a dazzling smile and she could have almost convinced me that, that tear had never existed but the smile didn't reach her eyes and her large plump lips quivered slightly.

"Angie, what's wrong?"

The words Angela said to me next made my heart stop beating for a few seconds. I will never forget the way she looked at me when she said those words. Her face was a mask of open grief.

She shook her head and looked down. She takes another strand of hair and tucks it behind her ear. Her diamond earrings sparkle as she looks up again.

"Skye," She whispers.

She repeats my name before she says "I think I might be pregnant."

My heart drops, not in surprise but just in dread. If she was pregnant...
Out of all the things I could have said in that moment, I chose to say this:

"Who's the father?" Of course I knew who the father was. Angie knew that I knew and the look of indignation she gave me lasts for about two seconds before the pained look returns. I just needed to hear the words coming from her mouth.

"Devon" she whispers hoarsely.

I feel a little part of me die.
Of course, it had to be Devon.