My Heart Beats Faster

Chapter 13 - Paralyzed

Note: I do not own any lyrics I have used, going to use. 

My mom drove me to the hospital right after school. I would've not gone if I knew Alexandra would have been disappointed that I skipped school just to be with her. I spent all the time I could with her just waiting for her to wake up. She still hasn't. I brought the team with me this time.

We all entered the room I had slept in for the past two days. I sat down in my regular seat while everyone else stood up.

“Why didn't you tell us, Alex?” Nathan asked in a small voice. He was scared too, I could hear it with every word he spoke.

“More importantly, why didn't you tell me?” I asked, angry. We became so close, but she didn't even have the guts to tell me something is wrong.

“Calm down, Devin,” Conor said, “What is wrong with her anyways?”

“She pulled a lot of muscles in her right leg,” I replied. “Not only that, after that hardcore game she had a serious asthma attack.”

“I didn't know she had asthma,” Nick whispered.

“Neither did I until Saturday,” I told him.

Jackson who seemed quiet the entire time spoke up, “Doesn't she usually kick with her right leg?”

I finally realized everything. Why she had been walking so slow. Now that I think of it, she slightly limped. Why she just waited close to the goal instead of stealing the ball. I thought more of it and the entire game each goal she scored she used her left leg. She breathed a lot harder than the rest of us by the game was over, and we were panting.

“Oh no,” I whispered.

“What is it?” Conor asked.

“I was being such an idiot. I should have noticed something was wrong,” I replied to Conor. I turned to Alexandra who was still unconscious, “I'm so sorry.” I started to cry. I held her hand and buried my face in it.

“It's okay,” a voice croaked. It was so familiar, so much like Alexandra's.

“Now I'm hallucinating that Lex is talking to me,” I cried. This was crazy.

“Your not hallucinating,” the voice said. I looked up to see Alexandra smiling at me weakly.

“I think we're gonna leave you two alone,” Conor said. “C'mon boys.” He kind of pushed them out the door.

“But Alex's awake!” Nathan said. He looked like a puppy who's owners finally came back home.

“Yes, we need to tell the nurse,” Jackson said, trying to calm the boy. Jackson was always cool headed. They all left, quietly shutting the door behind them. I could still hear Nathan repeating 'Alex's awake!' over and over again.

“Water,” Alexandra said, very quietly. I quickly got out my Camelback water bottle and pressed the straw up to her lips. I could hear some sipping and then it stopped. I returned the water bottle to its place in my backpack.

“Thanks,” she said. I could tell it hard to talk because everything she said was soft.

“No problem,” I told her.

“I'm sorry.”

“For?”

“Not telling you.”

“I should have seen that something was wrong.”

“No, if I wasn't so hard-headed then I wouldn't be sitting in this hospital bed right now.”

“But-”

“Say another word, Rossi, and I'm telling your mom what happened at the after party of our second game,” she warned. This was serious because I could get into a lot of trouble from my actions at that party. I tried to forget, but she always threatened to tell my mom about it so it was hard. Not only that it was hard to forget doing stuff like that.

What happened was that Nathan dared me to jump into the pool, right? But Nathan said that I had to jump into the pool naked. I did it of course, it was party and I was a little bit hyper. The pool wasn't empty though. I think everyone in was drunk though so I think I'm okay.

“Can you sing for me?” she pleaded. I decided to go with it because she was in a hospital bed.

“What song?”

“Do you know any Big Time Rush?” Of course I did. They were also my idols.

You, you walked into the room

On a Friday afternoon

That's when I saw you for the first time

and I was Paralyzed

I had a million things to say

But non of them came out that day

'Cause I was never one of those guys

That always had the best lies

Time starts tickin'

My hands keep shakin'

and you dont even know that

I'm tryin' to speak but girl you got me tongue tied

I'm tryin' to breathe but I'm f-f-frozen inside

Try to move but I'm stuck in my shoes

Got me Paralyzed, Paralyzed

P-P-P-Paralyzed

I see you walkin' but all you do is pass me by

Can't even talk

'Cause words don't fall into my mind

I'd make a move if I had the guts to

But I'm Paralyzed

Paralyzed

P-P-P-Paralyzed

She applauded but then said, “Why didn't you finish the song?”

“Because I wouldn't have a reason to come back tomorrow,” I told her then winked.

“Will you leave if I sleep now?”

“I'm afraid I have to leave whether or not you sleep now.”

“Aww.”

“I'll be back!” I said then turned my back as if I had a cape. She giggled, but soon fell asleep. I left the room with a grin on my face. But not before taking a picture of her perfection.