The One I See

Chapter 21

ALISHA

Dahil wala sa apartment si Megan for the weekend, nagsiuwian nalang din kami ni Shauna. Nabuboryo naman ako sa bahay dahil hindi maganda ang panahon.

"Are you okay?" Ate Alyanna asked.

Tumango ako. "Oo naman."

Ngumiti siya at umupo sa tabi ko. Ngumuso siya at tiningnan ako.

"Do you miss him? I heard what happen between you two."

Bitter smile flashed in me. Tumango ako at tiningnan ang kawalan. It's okay to be emotional 'di ba?

"I can't understand why this is happening." Ngumiti ako, tiningnan ko siya sabay natawa habang pinunasan ang namumuo kong luha. "N-Nagmahal lang naman ako."

She clears her throat bago yumakap sa'kin. "You're tough. Why waste your tears on someone who makes you cry?"

Napailing ako. "Hindi ko alam. I have many reasons to give up. P-Pero...I also have many reasons to wait...to stay."

Napabuntong-hininga siya. "I just hope you'll find someone new."

"Every night, our memories popped into my mind. I couldn't just get... rid of him, the way he left me. That's hurting me,so much."

Pinagsaklop ko ang dalawang kamay ko.

"I can't imagine myself being capable of loving another person."

Nangilid muli ang luha ko. Nanatili siyang nakikinig sa akin.

"M-Mahal na mahal ko siya, Ate."

My tears burst. For the long time, ngayon ko lang nailabas 'to. Since the beginning, ngayon ko lang naisabi 'to sa iba. But still, my heart is still in cage. Hindi nawawala ang sakit.

Her hug tighten. Isinandal ko nalang ang ulo ko.

"If time will come that your pain will heal. I'm sure that person is the man who will spend his lifetime with you. Bata ka pa, Alisha. You will still experience more pains in life. Love is bitter if the person isn't right for you."

Tumingin siya sa mga mata ko at hinawakan ang kamay ko.

"There are people who wants to see you happy. Stop being sad."

My heart melted. Tama nga siya. Why would I keep myself sad about what's happening right now. I can just wait and wait until he will comeback.

She walks out to my door nang marinig ang busina sa labas. May shooting pa raw siya sa Baguio and Kuya Seth will fetch her para may kasama siya papuntang PNC, where her network company located. She told me that Mom and Dad went to Cebu for our business. Alyzza is nowhere to be found, maybe she's with Aubrey kaya napagtanto kong baka ako lang mag-isa rito.

I decided to do my own thing then. I cleaned my room, arranged my shelf. Bumaba rin ako to talk to Nanay Rose. Then I went back to my room.

Natigil ako sa pagbabasa nang tumunog ang cellphone ko. I saw that there's an unknown number texting me kaya agad akong kinabahan.

Maybe this is Blake?

What if it's him? Oh shit! Anong gagawin ko? Rurupok ba ako o hindi? Damn it.

Pinaypayan ko muna ang sarili ko bago ko binuksan iyon..

From: unknown number
How are you? Pwede ka bang pumunta sa park?

I don't know how this happened. Pagkabasa ko no'n, alam ko na agad kung sino ito. Thunders of heartbeat flashed. There's a realization in my head, pero ayaw kong maniwala.