Was Never Enough

She still cares

Blake : I woke up when I felt some movement in my hand and I opened my eyes immediately remembering Alyssa .

As I looked at my hand I realised that her hand was not there anymore and I followed her hand to her face . She was awake but she was facing the opposite side . I felt so relived and happy , I immediately cupped her face and moved to face me but I saw her face covered in tears . She flinched in disgust at my touch . Holding both my hands she removed them and turned on the opposite side .

I felt a sudden pain but I was happy that she was fine and I asked for the doctor .

After a while Cole came with a new doctor . Actually only he was available during the night hours . He was a young , I guess he was of my age .

He tried to hide a smile seeing Alyssa but I knew immediately that he was attracted to her . I stiffen as he held Alyssa's hand to check the pulse rate .

He then checked her temperature and some reports . He constantly gazed towards her and I clenched my fist ready to break his head but Alyssa wouldn't like it . Also she didn't even looked at the doctor once she just stared at the ring on her finger .

" She is ready to get discharged . You just need to take a good care of her and check her from time to time . " he handed me the prescription and her reports while looking at her . He is just shamelessly trying to hit on a patient .

" And you beautiful are on a complete bed rest for a day or two and then you'll be back to look more beautiful then you look right now ." he said with a huge smirk winking at her . She gave a shy smile but nothing more and I just stood there trying not to let my anger go up to my head .

I turned towards the doctor and held my hand for him to shake
" Thanku doctor for taking care of my wife " I said with the 'wife ' part loud and clear for him to listen . He quickly turned towards me and was surprised at my tone .
He took in my hand and started saying
" there is no need to thank buddy it's my dutyyyyyyy ahhh " not so fast man I said as I clenched his hand in mine as hard as I could . Then I took my hand back and he just stood there glaring at me and I gave him a murderous look and he literary ran out of the room I was oddly satisfied with it .

Cole handed me the bag . I asked him to get some clothes for Alyssa from my cupboard . They would be more comfortable for her as Lisa's clothes are really fitted and would be uncomfortable in this condition .

I eyed Cole to leave so that she could change . I called the nurse . And in came an old lady .

" can you please help my wife in changing her clothes " I asked her remembering the fact that she is still weak to do such things . She quickly took the bag from me and went towards Alyssa and I turned to leave .

" no I won't strip naked in front of a stranger and I am completely fine and I could change by myself ." Alyssa spoke for the first time after she wake up . Not even a day could pass without her revolting on anything .

" Alyssa just let her help you . You are really weak and just woke up like few hours ago and you might even feel a bit dizzy . " I said in a calm voice , trying to make her agree for this .

" No I won't" she said harshly and turned to go to the washroom snatching the bag from the lady but as she took a few step forward she felt a bit dizzy again and stopped in the track . I immediately went towards her and held her up, she tried for a few minutes to remove my hand but gave up after a few attempts as she didn't have energy at the point to fight .

" Now you realised why I called her . I guess now you could take her help " I said as I helped her to sit on the bed .

" no " she said in a low voice , she was about to cry . So I didn't force her anymore and asked the nurse to leave and closed the door after she left .

" Alyssa I can't leave you alone as I know what would happen if I leave you again like the last time I did . So please just let me help you and trust me I would close my eyes at all time and wouldn't even peak " I pleaded .

" But .." she said but I interrupted her .

"no but Alyssa I can't leave you alone again and watch you like this " I said .

"But I don't want to wear your clothes ever again " she said with a stern face .

I just acted that I didn't listen and went towards her holding the sweatshirt in my hands and closed my eyes as I took hold of the hospital gown and started to take it upwards to remove it over her head but my fingers brushed her soft skin and we both felt some kind of electric current run through our body .

She passed me the sweatshirt and I helped her in wearing it but it was hard to resist looking at her beautiful body in front of me .

Then I bend down taking the trackpants in my hands . Her hands rested on my shoulders taking the support as she put her legs in the trackpants and I then pulled it up and folded the end of trackpants as it was to long for her height .

I stood up and opened my eyes and our eyes met hers and she tried to hide the smile that was forming on her lips .

I moved my hands to fold the sleeves of the sweatshirt never leaving her eyes . Even she didn't move her eyes anywhere but turned away once we were done .

We left the hospital after some more formalities . We dropped Cole home and then continued our way home . No one said a word on our way back .She just looked out of the window and she looked in peace .

I helped her out once we reached . She felt pain as she walked so I just picked her up in my arms and for the first time she didn't try to revolt and was just silent . As the lift opened to our floor we went towards the door but my keys were in my pocket and both my hand were holding her and the medicines and prescription .

" Alyssa can you .... you know ..... take the keys out of my right pocket ." I said breaking her from her thoughts . She looked at me nodding and just bent down a little and towards my right .

As she bent down a little more her sweatshirt went up and her back brushed with my arm and then on the opposite side her hand searched for the keys in my pocket .

And I don't know how but I felt hot and already turned on just by her hand brushing on my leg . I control it realising her condition and our current situations .

She looked at me holding the keys
" are these the keys that you asked for ??" never realising the fact that I was turned on by what just happened . God she was so innocent .

I nodded and bend a bit so she could open the door . Then we entered the apartment and I was about to lead to her room but her room was already a mess so I placed her on my bed .

" you can sleep her and I'll sleep on the floor right next to you so you could ask me whenever you need me ." I said waiting for her response but she just closed her eyes and snnugled in the bed .

I went inside the kitchen and cooked some soup for her and washed the dishes . Then I went inside her room and cleaned the room and removed the door frame so that it hurts no one .

After the soup was fully cooked I went inside the room . She was just lying down with her eyes on the ceiling .
I sat beside her, helped her sit . I helped her drink the soup blowing it slowly so it's not too hot and making her drink .

After she finished the soup I gave her the medicines and checked her fever .

Then I tucked her in bed and was about to stand when she held my hand
" Blake you can sleep on the bed . It is huge and I won't like it if you sleep on the floor ." She said in a shy voice . I felt happy for the fact that she still cares for me and I just nodded .

I took the bowl back in the kitchen washed it . Then I  went for a bath and when I entered the room she was already asleep .
So I just went on the opposite side of the bed and pulled the sheets over the both of us .

I just stared at the window in front of the bed thinking about my changing feelings and her innocence . The guilt for behaving so rudely killed me inside . I wanted to hurt her but not so much that she would break into pieces .

Looking at her again I removed a strand of hair that covered her face and brushed her cheek with my thumb as I said softly

" I am really sorry Alyssa"