My Brother's Best Friend

Too Far

"Hey Sky," my dad says eyeing me suspiciously. I know my face looks weird because I am still shocked at Jensen cutting herself. He pushes past me and evacuates their home. "Where's everyone?" he wants to know.
"Um, Jensen's mom is at work and Jensen's upstairs taking a shower..." I inform him. He stares at me for a minute.
"Are you hiding something from me?"
"No dad, I swear," I lie.
"I don't mean to accuse you of things but it's just that you've been acting weird lately. Is it a boy? Is there something you want to talk to me about?" I shake my head.

"Are you ready to go home?" he wants to know.
"No dad, there's something I need to discuss with Jensen. I'll be home in an hour or two." My dad looks at me again.
"I don't want you with any boys Sky. I'll have Drew pick you up."
"Okay." I say. If only my dad knew Drew was the one I was with... He leaves without a word and as soon as the door closes, Jensen comes down the steps. "Thank you..." she says in a shaky voice.
"Start talking..." is all I say.
"I don't know Sky. I don't know WHY I do this to myself. I just hate my life. I have no friends, my dad doesn't give a sh** about me and... and..." She's crying again. I run over to hug her. "I thought about committing suicide Sky. I've tried to clear my mind but the thoughts just keep coming back. I don't know what to do."
"You have to go get help. No matter what, you HAVE to tell your mom. Do it or I'll do it. And if you ever need someone to talk to, just call me Jen." I tell her. She hugs me tightly and doesn't let go for a long time...
        Drew picks me up about an hour later and I don't feel like talking. I sit in the passenger seat just thinking. Thinking about Jensen, thinking about the way I'd been acting all summer, thinking about Joseph and Drew going to college, my parents, EVERYTHING! Drew didn't seem to notice I guess since we rarely talked anymore. We mostly kissed now... He stopped the car at the gas station and got out. "Gotta get some gas or Jo will be pissed." he mumbles getting out of the car. I don't say anything. I don't feel like talking. I feel like a horrible person. I pull my phone out to look at the time and instead I find myself looking at the date. It's August and time is running out. Time to spend with Drew. Time for us being together. In a month or two we'll be over. Drew will get to college and meet way prettier girls and forget all about me. His best friend's sister. I watch Drew pump gas into the car and then we go home.
       The house is empty. Go figure. My dad trusted me a little too much with Drew. I guess he thought Drew was the same guy he was two years ago and not the guy who I'd been kissing for the past week. I kind of hoped somebody would be at home. I didn't want to be alone with Drew right now. "You okay? You look like you're thinking about something..." he says suddenly. I decide to ask him about college.
"Did you ever decide what college you're going to?" I want to know.
"Yeah, I didn't think you'd want to talk about it.... I'm going to Rochester." Really? The other side of the country? I tried to hide my feelings and I guess I succeeded because he smiles and unlocks the door. I want to tell him not to leave, to go to college here, but I know I can't do it. I just have to be with him now and let him go next month. Now is important.
       As soon as we're inside. I push him against the wall and press my lips against his hard. He stands there shocked for a minute before he starts kissing me back. I tug on his shirt breathing super hard and he wraps his arms around me squeezing me as close to him as possible. I stop kissing him and look around the house. All of the lights are off and you can hear nothing but the sound of our ragged breathing. "C'mon," I whisper even though there's no need to since there's no one else around.
      I pull him into my room and we start kissing on the bed. I want him. I always said I'd stay a virgin until I was 18 but I want to lose my virginity to him. Someone who I trust and someone who I've loved most of my life. Not some guy I hardly know. Drew's familiar and I love him so it just... feels right. I feel as if I have to do it now or else I'll lose my chance in a month. I sit up and yank my shirt off revealing the lace bra from Victoria Secret that my mom insisted that I wear. He lets go of me. "What are you doing?" he questions.
"Shhh! I want to..." is all I say before kissing him again. He wraps his arms around me and I can feel his hands on my bare back. "I'm not gonna have sex with you..." he whisper into my ear. I freeze. My cheeks burn. I pull away from him. "Why not?" I say getting mad.
"Because you're too young..."
"Oh really? Joseph had sex when he was 15 and you lost yours when you're 16!"
"That doesn't mean you should! I'm not gonna take advantage of you Sky!"
"It's not taking advantage if I WANT to."
"You don't know what you want okay? Trust me I want to but I'm not and you're not either."

      I can feel the tear roll down my cheek. He wipes it. "What's wrong? You've been acting weird since you left Jensen's." I shake my head. "Can you just be here with me?" I ask.
"Always." he says. I sit my shirt on the bed and lean over to kiss him. He kisses me back and I know that what I wanted to do was stupid. I don't exactly know why the thought came into my head. Just that it did. I block out all of the thoughts in my head and lay down and let Drew kiss me. I don't know how long we lay there kissing before suddenly hearing my bedroom door open. I froze...