Little White Lies (Harry Styles)

Chapter 49

Lola's POV:

I'm hurt, so fucking hurt, to the point of numbness. I want to tell him to leave but I can't find the words or even the strength to do so, because then I know that what we had will be over. And I know I probably sound pathetic, he just cheated on me and I don't want to tell him to go because that means we're over, but I really don't know if I can go another day without him. Even though we'd only been together for a little under a month now, what I'd felt for him was indescribable - and I thought that the feelings were mutual. Considering we hadn't slept together yet either, so it's not like he was just using me for the sex. He acted like he cared, he really did, and I depended on him. 

I don't want to end it with him, no way! But I want to hurt him as much as he's hurt me, then again, i'm not sure if I'm capable of that.

"Sorry if you felt as if I wasn't enough for you" this is the first thing either of us have said in several minutes. He finally looks up at me.

"No, no that's not the reason I did it" He shakes his head numerous times, then giving me eye contact and placing his hand on my thigh, causing me to flinch. "I can change though, I regret it so much. I've just had so much shit going on"

"And that's my fault. If it wasn't for me then Jake would probably be dead right now, like you want, and you wouldn't be in the hopsital visiting me either. But I'm not a charity case Harry. If you're going to stay, then stay for a long time. If you're going to leave, then do it today. If you're going to change, then change for the better. And if you're going to talk, make sure you mean what you say." I recite the words my mum said to me when I was younger. She was very wise beyond her years, she taught me so many things that at that age; I had no idea what to do with them.

"She wasn't as pretty as you" He mumbled and I practically began choking on my spit.

"What?"

"She had short, dead hair, her eyes held nothing, she was much bigger than you, really really bad acne, she was moody, and don't even get me started on her eyebrows. Plus she was old, I don't know what went through my mind but she must have been at least 35" He lists all the bad things about her, and for a mere second, I kind of feel bad for the girl, but then I remember how much I hate her.

"Please stop, I don't want to know anymore. I just want you to promise me it won't happen again and that we can forget it ever happened." I said whilst wiping my eyes. I felt a pair of warm lips press against my cheek, delicately yet firmly.

"You're amazing" He whispered against my skin and I couldn't help the blush that crept onto my tear stained cheeks.

"I'm still mad" I said sternly, my smile fading.

"I know baby, but i'm so sorry. And I swear I'll make it up to you" He takes my hand in his and rubs it softly. "When can you leave?"

"Today, hopefully, the doctors haven't said anything more though" I frown slightly. I've been in hospital for over a week now and it's so horrible! I miss my granddad more than anything, I haven't seen him in what feels like forever, and bless Harry; he's been taking round dinner for him. I owe him one. No you don't, he fucked a girl whilst you were in hopsital, recovering from being shot! My subconscious reminded me. Bitch, I hate how honest and right she is.

"Would you like me to go and ask?" I nod at his question and he gets up. But before leaving the room he takes my face in his large rough hands and connects our lips. I swear i've never felt such relief in my life to feel his lips on mine, and for a second I forget everything.

"I love you" He whispers after resting his forehead on mine.

"can you get me a drink whilst you're there please?" I ask, wanting to change the subject as i'm not too keen on saying the words, just yet anyway. I see the hurt in his facial features, that really wasn't my intention.

"Say it" He orders, frowning slightly at the fact I didn't say the words I love you, but can you honestly blame me, i'm still a little angry and very upset about the events that occured.

"Harry, i'm just still angry" I reply softly so that he doesn't get angry and say something he may regret. I hear him gulp loudly and nod once before hesitantly detatching his hands from my face and leaving the room.

Harry's POV

I ruined everything. She doesn't love me anymore and I feel as if i've lost hope, I know I can't though. It took weeks for her to finally let me in and to trust me, and now i've gone and fucked up, taking us right back to square one. I never meant to hurt her, I don't know why I said the things I said but as soon as they left my mouth I regretted them immediately! My plan was for her to get really angry and to tell me to leave and then I was going to tell her everything; The bet, Emily etc. But she had to go and take me back didn't she. I really wasn't expecting it and i'm so thankful she did, but now I don't know when i'm going to tell her about the other shit that i've done.

I walk down the hallway and see a doctor. 

"Excuse me?"

I ask, and the old man swivels round to face me, nodding.

"My girlfriend is in room 182 and somebody told her that she would be discharged today but no one has said anything" I mentally face palm at the fact that I called her my girlfriend, but she is, isn't she?

"Aha, Lolita Callaghan. Yes she should be able to leave after lunch today, we were just on our way to tell her but I guess you can do that now. Somebody should just come and double check in a bit but i'm 100% she's safe to go home." His words reassure me that she's going to be okay and I'm so happy for her.

"Thankyou" I reply before turning around and heading back to the room after grabbing a drink from the water dispenser for Lola, i'm not sure if she actually did want a drink or whether it was just a change of topic so that she didn't want to say I love you back, but either way i'm going to do everything in my power to treat her the best that I can so she'll forgive me; even if it means getting her a cup of water.

A cough soon sounded not far behind me, stopping me from entering room 182, I turned to face whoever coughed, and my eyes widen in surprise.

"Dad? What are you doing here?" I ask, completely shocked.

"I'm here to sort your mess, Son"