Summer Milestone

Do You Hate Me?

Chapter 14

~JOSH~

When I wake up the next morning at fucking ten o'clock, I see that Zack is still gone. Internally I start to worry a bit that something might have happened to him, considering I haven't seen him since he stormed out of the room last night.

I get out of bed to take a peek outside the back french-doors and surely enough I see Zack sitting over by the pool all by himself.

Despite how much I dread confronting him after... what happened, I do it anyway seeing as we can't just avoid it forever. Once I get dressed and clean myself up, I head on outside and slowly approach Zack as he sits at the edge of the pool with his legs dangling in the water. He doesn't look nor react to my coming so I break the ice after a slight moment of silence between the two of us. "Where did you go last night?"

"Does it matter?" He replies coldly, not even bothering to look at me.

"I just... wanted to know."

He doesn't respond to me and continues to act as if I am not there.

"Are you angry with me?" I ask, sensing some sort of hostility from him.

He takes a couple of seconds to respond but when he does, his answer doesn't sound too truthful. "No," he replies with a deep sigh.

"Then why are you acting so weird?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Both you and I know we can't just forget about what happened last night—"

"Nothing happened," he cuts me off, looking at me for the first time since the conversation started.

"If nothing happened then why are you acting all cold and distant? Why are you treating me like I'm your enemy all of a sudden?"

He doesn't even answer. It's like we're texting and he just flat-out left me on "Read."

"I mean... do you hate me?"

Zack finally looks at me again. "Of course not." Unfortunately, he doesn't say anything else.

"Could we at least talk about—"

"There's nothing to talk about, man."

I guess he's gonna pretend that what transpired last night never happened at all. Which I guess makes sense from his point of view given how I reacted. Damn, I really did fuck up, didn't I? Internally, I know that I somewhat wanted him to kiss me but my pride prevented me from letting it happen. And now look at the mess I created! My best friend doesn't know how to act around me after he practically threw himself at me and I rejected him. I can't believe it, the person I love the most basically told me he felt the same way and I turned him down all because of my stupid ego.

"Are we still bros?" I ask him, fearing that what went down last night may have created a rift in our friendship.

Our line of sight connects once more and in my mind, I'm hoping to see a smile form on his face to say, "Of course we are!" But unfortunately, that doesn't happen. He stares at me for a hot second, shooting me nothing but a straight face, and before he gets the chance to reply, I hear Anna's voice in the background, diverting both of our attentions.

"We've been looking for you guys!" She calls as she and Erica approach us from behind.

"You guys sleep well?" Erica asks either one of us.

"Yeah," I of course lie, not wanting to sound negative. Zack, on the other hand, doesn't respond at all.

"So, are we still heading to the—" Anna begins before Zack cuts her off.

"Um... sorry guys, but I really just wanna go home. I'm not really feeling too great today," he says, making me feel so bad on the inside that my cheeks start to grow sore and my face turns red and warm. It's one of the worst feelings in the world when you realize your best friend doesn't want to be friends with you anymore, all because of stupid insecurities.

"Aw, really? I hope you're not feeling too bad," Erica says, rubbing Zack's shoulder.

"Hangover. You know how those go," he says, faking a smile.

"Oh yeah, that sucks. Well, I hope you guys had fun last night," she says, not expressing a hint of frustration over the fact that we're cutting our trip a bit short.

"Josh, are you okay? You seem a bit... hot," Anna says to me, noticing my red face.

"Yeah, I'm good. Too much to drink last night."

Anna rolls her eyes. "What is it with boys and getting drunk?"

Erica just shrugs. "Well... we're gonna go grab breakfast if you guys wanna join us?"

"No, we're just—" I begin, before being interrupted.

"Yeah," Zack cuts me off for the billionth time and to my surprise he gets up to go with them, leaving me behind at the pool. He doesn't say a goddamn word to me. And it's the same way on the road home. Hell, that's even worse, considering it's a six-hour drive. Six long hours of fearing that my best friend hates me. Even the girls notice that something's up between the two of us... little do they know. Fuck, I hate this so much, I feel like things will never be the same. I feel like our friendship has now changed forever.