How Did I Get So Lucky?

Chapter 19 ~ It Wouldn't Hurt

"Someone like you?" I whispered back to Sean who stared back at me with cerulean blue eyes. He was searching my eyes, looking for an answer but I could tell he couldn't find one, that I wasn't able to be read right now. "Why not Sandy?" I looked at my hands. I was fidgeting with them. He grabbed them and put them in his warm hands. He as being so gentle with me. As if I might break if he grabbed me the wrong way. I think I would have too.

A million thoughts were going through my head and I couldn't think clearly. I mean, I liked Sean, he was just amazing but what about Jamie? What if he thinks I don't love him anymore and that I tossed him to the side? I would never do that to Jamie just because I would feel bad not going out with Sean.

I took a deep breathe. "I can't say yes or no right now." I felt him shift and lay back down on the bed. "So what? A maybe? Greaaaaat." God this sucks, I'm terrible! "Yes a maybe, please Sean I'm not sure if I'm ready but well...I really do like you and so...we will see?" I looked behind me and he had his eyes closed with his arms behind his head. I saw his chest rise slowly up and down. "I will take that." He said in his husky voice. I laid back with him until my mom said dinner was ready.

----December 4, Thursday----

"Candy. You need to help me with this whole Sean thing!" We were in Russian class and I couldn't get Sean off my mind. As soon as he had left after dinner I called Candy and told her everything. She knew something like this was going to happen just because she could tell Sean had liked me from the very start, even when I was going out with Jamie.

She heaved a sigh and rolled her eyes. I could tell I was annoying her already about Sean but well she was my only girlfriend I had and I needed her advice on this big time.

"Just go on a date with him for God's sake!" I rolled my eyes. I could...I mentally slapped myself. No, no you can't. She looked at me and saw me frowning. "Sandy..." I looked away and ignored her the whole class period.

Nobody understands! Nobody fucking gets it!

When class was over Candy changed the subject from about Sean and Jamie and talked about our homework. I didn't want us to fight so I just went along with the conversation. Thank god it was the end of the day and now I get to enjoy an awkward ass car ride to my house. Oh well, we pick our dooms I guess.

I went outside to his car by myself. Candy was going home with Ray today so I told her to go catch up with him and to not worry about me. She reluctantly went to Ray but well I told her I was fine and I guess she believe me. I got to the car and waited for Sean. I rubbed my hands to make them warm and blew a puff with the cold air. I waited for ten minutes until I looked at my phone and saw I had a text from him:

Come to the cafeteria :) xx

I smiled to myself and I was just thinking what the hell is going on.

I walked all the way over to the cafeteria and opened the door as best as I could. No body was in there so I panicked a little but then I saw an red arrow on the ground. It was pointing to he door that lead to the hallways. I opened the doors and walked out to the hallways. There were some teens that were still there but they weren't paying any attention me.

I saw there was bunch of arrows on the walls, I followed and followed them until I got to the music room. I bit my lips and took a deep breathe.

Everything is fine I thought to myself and kept repeating to myself.

I turned the knob to the door and it creaked. I saw Sean with his back to me on the piano. "Sean....?" He looked over to me and gave me a boyish grin.