BTS Angsts

Time/Seokjin

Your POV

Life is all about balance

"Y/N! Oh my gosh! See what Naeun bought me! Isn't she the sweetest?!" Jin exclaimed, showing off a charm bracelet his girlfriend bought him.

I smiled warmly, admiring the silver bracelet that hug off of his right wrist.

Song Naeun was Jin's girlfriend. I liked her, and had no problems with her whatsoever. She was kind, and treated Jin with respect.

I was Jin's best friend, since well, birth practically. We were those stereotypical "do everything together" type friends.

I knew he had a crush on Naeun since middle school. He liked her so much, so what kind of friend would I be not to help him get together with her? And when she accepted his confession after a superior date made by me, he was ecstatic. He loved her so much, and I was happy that he found someone who would treat him right.

However as the months passed, he started to get distant from me, and his grades started to drop. It wasn't an Earth shattering drop but it's not what he typically got. And I'm definitely not one to be possessive of him, because why shouldn't he spend time with his girlfriend. I know she's not the suspicious type, but I don't want her getting the wrong idea about us.

But he was getting really distant. We rarely ever talked, unless he was ranting to me about how perfect she was, or if he needed help with homework. I was still going to be there for him, but shouldn't he be there for me too?

I was going through a lot of stuff lately, like typical high school drama. My parents divorced recently so I've had to bounce around houses. I get picked on a lot. It's nothing I can't handle, because I'm not a delicate flower, but sometimes I wished I had Jin back to just bounce ideas off of.

"Yah! Y/N, are you okay? You kind of spaced out," Jin called, snapping me back into reality.

"Yeah sorry. What's up?" I said distantly.

"So our two year anniversary is coming up, and I don't know what to do for her. You're really good at coming up with these things, so could you help me?" He pleaded.

"Jin, these things have to come from the heart. Naeun is nice, but I'm not in love with her like you are. Only you can plan special things for her. I'm not you. But I know you'll figure out something amazing, because you're Jin, and you're a miracle worker," I said.

"Thanks Y/N! You always know what to say!" He squealed, running off to Naeun.

I sighed, turning my wrist to the upside.

"Dying is easy, living is harder. And I'm never ever going to be one to take the easy way out," I said.

Time Skip

I arrived at my mom's house, hearing the oddly satisfying sound of her, obnoxiously tapping at the keyboard on her computer.

"Hey honey. Dinner is whatever you want. Just order it," my mom said distantly.

My parents also rarely ever paid attention to me.

I went up to my room slamming the door.

Taking out my phone, I saw texts from Jin.

Jin😜: Omg Y/N I need help

Jin😜: Please answer

Jin😜: Y/N!

Me: What?!

Jin😜: Thank god. Naeun asked if I wanted to go to the college she was thinking of going to. It has the subject I want to major in, and so obviously I accepted, but it's in America. You're good at English. Could you help me with it?

I just stared at his text, tears brimming in my eyes. We had promised each other that we would go to the same college. Maybe I was being petty and possessive but that was one thing we agreed on forever. And he just threw it to the side.

I went into my bathroom, and sunk to the floor. I was losing my best friend. He was leaving me to my own devices. I started silently crying. Tears of pain only I would know about. Tears that would run down the drain and be forgotten about. Tears that would be my little secret. Tears that would dry with time.

All I wanted was for him to spend a little bit of time with me. And not forget my existence all together.

I covered my mouth preventing any loud sobs escaping the room.

I was about to continue my pity party, but I heard sobs coming from the living room.

I slowly got up and dried my eyes. I ran downstairs to see my mother sobbing.

"Mom?! What's wrong?" I asked, picking her up.

"You as such a good child, and I'm so lucky to have you. Even though we put you through so much, you continue to share your big heart with everyone. Sweetheart I'm so sorry," she sobbed.

"Mom what are you talking about?" I said.

"They're taking you away from both of us. You're going to have to move in with your aunt and uncle. I'm sorry that you'll have to give up Jin. And I'm sorry that we weren't good enough," she cried.

I have to move? Meaning change schools? No more bullying? No more broken family? No more Jin?

The last question stuck in my mind. Was I being selfish?

"Mom it's okay. You both did nothing wrong. Love doesn't always work out that well. It's alright. I'll go and pack," I said.

I went back to my room will all the questions ringing in my head.

I looked at my phone again.

Jin😜: Y/N???? You can't leave me hanging like that! If you didn't want to do it you could've just said so

Me: Jin I'm moving schools

Jin😜: Oh so now you start talking about yourself

Me: Did you not just understand what I said. I'm moving schools! See this is exactly what I'm saying! You've completely forgotten me! I never asked you to spend more time with me then your girlfriend, I just wanted a little acknowledgment. And even then I never complained. While you were busy with your first world problems, the bullying got worse and I have to bounce around houses. But you wouldn't care about that. I hope you and Naeun are happy, and I guess I'll see you when I do, but this is what I'm saying Jin. You've turned away from me. I had to fix myself on my own. All I was asking for was a second with you. A second where it was like before. Just a second. But you couldn't spare me even a millisecond. Please be happy Jin because that's all I've ever wanted for you. English isn't that hard and I'm happy that you've found someone who will make you happy. Goodbye Jin

[read at 4:36 p.m.]