happenings

alone

10/28/18 -

have y'all ever felt the feeling where you're not physically alone, you're surrounded with people; be it those who care about you or can't give a single shit about you. in all reality, we're actually not legitimately alone most of the time but we always tend to say that we feel lonely or we need someone. i guess this is just human nature, to want somebody who would be there for us; doesn't matter if its emotionally or physically, we just want someone around 24/7. and because of this loneliness we feel, we tend to think about things we shouldn't be thinking of and this itself may cause us to feel down. this is exactly how i'm feeling right now. i know its not possible to have someone be there for you 24/7 because let's be real, all of us have our own lives to handle, we're not super free to the extent that we can be with someone all the time. and yes, i know i exaggerated the 24/7 part, but what i'm trying to say is, i think we have to be comfortable with just being our ownselves before being around someone/ people. this is the part i'm still trying to figure out myself. in school, i always have my friends around me, but on the rare occasions that they aren't, i honestly just feel so left out from the rest of the world, i feel like everyone's judging me even though i know they aren't. i guess its normal to feel like that, but its not healthy. and those times where you're around so many people but you're not included in any one of their conversations? yeah, those suck too. honestly i have no idea how i'm supposed to overcome this, but i guess what we should just try to do is build up our own self-confidence. it's okay to be alone, but sometimes this can be deafening. we should have a balance of both 'me-time' and time spent with our friends, by this way, we can reflect on things but also forget about them once we're around other people. :')