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Chapter 10

Louis's pov (shocker, I know)

I did the one thing I seemed to be good at-I cried. I was so sick of him and the way he treated people and animals and me. He just had to explode again and cause damage to something. He always has to try and destroy something or hurt someone and he never cares about the damage he causes. After I ran away from him I went to the showgirls car to find Martha. Harry has been the only person I've confided in recently, but before him if I ever had trouble I went to Martha. She was two young to be my mother but she just had that motherly vibe. She always listened to my problems, she held me when I cried, she's always been there for me. Martha's the only person who knew about my situation with Richard. I feel bad that I haven't even told Harry, I'm just afraid to. I don't want him to treat me any differently or feel sorry for me, I didn't want that. I like the way things are between us and I don't want it to change. I walked inside and to Martha's bunk where she was laid back, reading a book. She saw me the moment I got to her bunk and worry filled her eyes.

"Louis, oh my God, what happened?" She asked sternly in her southern accent. Whenever she was stern with me I knew it was sincere and she really cared. She cupped my face in her hands, wiping my tears with her thumb. "What happened?" She hopped out of her bunk and led me to the lounging area, luckily no one else was there.

"R-Richard, h-he..." I stammered, I was shaking like crazy and had trouble finding my words.

"Louis, did he hit you again?" I shook my head quickly. She knew what he had done before, she had seen the bruises. He normally tried to keep it just where clothes could cover, but sometimes he would hit me in the face. Martha was my angel, she covered up my darkened cheek with make-up and hold me in her arms to comfort me. This has been going on for a long time, ever since I turned seven. See, he often blamed me for my mother's death, it broke my heart when he told me things like that. Martha's my safety.

"N-no, Rosie. H-he hit her and hurt her! A-and he nearly hit H-Harry with that damn bull hook!" I yelled through my stuttering and crying. She brought my head down to rest on her shoulder and she wrapped her arms around me. I felt like such a baby, I was twenty two and still crying to people and letting my father have his way. What was wrong with me?

"I'm so sorry, honey" She said, rubbing my hair. "These things are gonna happen, I know it's scary and no one should have to suffer from it. But he's beyond help, Louis, I don't think we could stop him if we tried." I nodded.

"I know...I just wish it would stop." I cried.

"I know." She rubbed my hair, "I know you do. Let me look at you." She took my face in her hands and rubbed my damp cheeks. "Oh, you've cried right through your makeup." She left and returned a moment later with a wet flannel and her makeup box. She wiped my face off with the flannel, removing what I hadn't cried through. "Your cheek looks a lot better."

"It doesn't hurt so bad anymore." A week or so ago when Arthur had accidentally spilled the lions food all over Richard. He was so angry when I tried calming him down he hauled off and hit me. He didn't know what he was doing, he was just angry. "Thank you for doing this. I-I just have to keep it covered as much as possible." She brushed across my cheek, covering up the greenish blotch.

"Anytime, darlin'" She finished and put her brush away. "I'm gonna say something that...maybe I'm not supposed to say, but the not knowing is driving me crazy."

"Not knowing what?" I asked.

"I've seen the way you and Harry look at each other." She said and my eyes widened, my heart rate picking up speed. "Is there something going on?" she pressed.

"Of course not, were friends, and he's a guy." Ouch, why did it hurt to say that? I wasn't sure if it was because I've never lied to Martha or because Harry is my boyfriend and I really really like him, maybe even lo- No, what? I don't love Harry, I really like him but I'm not sure it could be called love. Could it?

"Louis, you know you can tell me anything, right?" She said softly, caressing my hands. I nodded and smiled. "Ok, well, you should probably find Harry then. If Richard hurt Rosie I know Harry's a mess right now." She leaned forward and pecked my cheek before getting up. "Love ya, bud." She said, exiting the train car.

~*~

By the time I reached Richard's car I had calmed myself considerably. My eyes back to their normal appearance, no longer puffy and red. But before I could enter the car I heard voices inside. I recognized them as Richard and Harry-Oh no, this can't end well.

"Just...when I saw that bull run off with him I lost my mind. Everything we have is on Rosie and Louis. If I lose Louis, I lose everything I've worked for." I heard Richard, my so called father, explain. Of course he needed me, that's the only reason he hasn't killed me or Rosie yet (sarcasm).

"Then why do you feel the need to hurt them so much if you need them?!" Harry didn't yell, but his voice was firm. I could tell through his voice, that his eyes were crinkled in frustration.

"Because that bull is jeopardizing everything!" Richard yelled, "You don't sell tickets you go belly up! You're in the circus now, Cornell, you should learn the business." Somewhere mid sentence he had gotten a cigar, I could tell because he was talking like his mouth was half open. He only lit cigars at two times, when he was really relaxed or when he was really stressed. Right now, he is really stressed. They both remained silent a few seconds more until Richard continued. "Tell me, what were you planning on doing with that bull hook?" Oh no, Harry, no! Harry had expressed many times how much he despised Richard. I wasn't sure of what Harry was capable of doing to him, but I was scared to find out.

I jumped when the door was opened and Harry stepped out and quickly shut it behind him. He carried the bull hook in one hand and had at least four bottles from Richard's liquor cabinet in the other (Wow, his hands are big). He saw me as he came down the steps, his eyes were filled with anger but when he saw me they softened. "Hey." He greeted, approaching me. I muttered back a small "Hey." as well. "How much of that did you hear?" He crinkled the corner of his eyes.

"I heard enough." I stated flatly, "What did you plan on doing with that?" I pointed to the bull hook. He shrugged and gave a long huff of aggravation.

"I don't know, Louis," he brought hand up and put it on his forehead, pinching his eyes shut, "I was just angry. I-I...Louis, I wanted to hurt him so much, but, but I-I just couldn't."

"Because you're not that person." I grabbed his chin to make him look at me, "You are not a man who kills someone out of pure rage."

"I'm not so sure." He sadly scoffed, he was clearly upset with himself.

"Well, I am." I let my thumb rub across his cheek where a single tear had fallen. "Harry, you are the most amazing, considerate, smart, handsome, and gentle man I have ever met. I love being with you, I love the fact that you take me as I am despite all my flaws. Harry, I can't lose you over something like hurting Richard, he's not worth it." He stared into my eyes with his softened ones and breathed out slowly, calming more under my touch.

"I really want to kiss you right now." He whispered. I smiled at his boldness and let go of his face.

"I would love that more than anything right now." I sighed, "But we can't, it's still daylight, anyone could see us." Harry huffed but nodded, agreeing with me. "Did he give you those for Rosie?" I pointed to the liquor bottles.

"Yeah, he thinks it will help his guilt if he helps Rosie." I wasn't surprised. Even when he's supposedly helping someone else, he always manages to make it about himself. No such thing as a selfless deed with him. "You wanna help us clean her up?" I nodded my head. I needed to see Rosie after what happened to her. I feel really bad like it was all my fault Richard beat her. She didn't do anything wrong, she was just afraid. I guess Rosie and I have a lot more in common than I thought.

***

Sorry it's super short! please forgive me!

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Ily!