혼자 》Poetry

-=When You Love The Wrong Person=-

Dating has become a game of who can look the least desperate
you don't want to come off too keen so you put in no effort
You're reduced to a profile picture with a short snappy caption
forget personality, you're judged on attraction
replace phone conversations with messages through text
small talk, late responses are things we've come to expect

you'll spend ages wording a text
and then when you finally hit send, you wait
and you wait - it could be minutes, it could be hours, it could be days
one thing you can guarantee, is that you won't get a reply straight away

You ask him the simple question of hey, how are you?
to which he replies, 8 hours later - send nudes
You start to notice that he never really saw it as a priority to remember your name.
Cos to him all this ever was was just a game,
Only nice when he wants something.
and always quick to give you the blame.
Has no problem belittling and shaming you in front of his friends, while his ego inflates.
and it's this ongoing cycle that you put up with day after day after day.

Ever notice how you guys never seem to chat
cos he thinks he's better than that
or as he'd like to phrase it - 'doesn't want to get too attached'.

Always waits till 2 in the morning to talk to you,
and when he does finally get around to it, the only vocabulary he seems to use,
Is hey you wanna have fun, u up?, send me nudes,
Doesn't understand the meaning of no,
and can't possibly understand why that might not be okay with you.
and decides to reduce your confidence when you refuse.
Talks about how he doesn't like the way you dress, how you speak, what you do.
Without realising you start to think the same way too.
Completely unaware of the fact that he's slowly changing you.

You purposely make plans weeks in advance,
only for him to tell you last minute, that he no longer can.
said he had no time to reply yet you see him liking other girls pictures on Instagram
and that's when you learn fast, never to trust the man

things you've come to expect
one word responses, ignoring you all the time, waiting hours to respond to a text
making you a last priority, forgetting dates, leaving you on read,
and when you confront him about it he acts like he can't even remember what you said.

He's never satisfied,
You feel this constant pressure to compete,
nothing you do is ever good enough
and he reminds you that, every time he speaks.
You feel like you're annoying him,
he shows no interest in what you have to say,
you can't even remember the last time he asked you, hey, how was your day?
overtime your confidence slowly deteriorates.

If you know someone who treats you this way,
try to get out before it's too late.
Don't delude yourself with the thought that he's different or maybe he'll change.
Or how he's not like the others - reality check,
these types of people, they're all the same.
And whether you believe it right now or not, you deserve better.
You deserve someone who thinks you're great.
Find someone who respects you for you,
and spare yourself the heartache.