sound of your heart

37

I had successfully made it across the deserted parking lot and only a handful of feet away from my car, when I was finally able to release the painful breath I had been holding since regrettably crossing paths with Shawn inside the coffee shop. Words couldn't entirely describe how thankful I was that he had so easily let me go; I just knew I wouldn't be able to handle anymore of the conversation he was attempting to push onto me. Though I knew by blatantly avoiding my lingering issues with him would inevitably come back to bite me in the ass somehow, I just couldn't bring myself to care. At least not right now.

I just wanted to go home.

I double clicked the unlock button on my keys and shivered slightly as the cool air uncomfortably pinched my dampened cheeks. I didn't have a clue as to why I was still crying, given the conversation with Shawn had ended minutes ago and should've been long forgotten by now; but of course that was only wishful thinking, and I secretly knew that I'd most likely continue to cry over him and the mere thought of his presence over the next few days.

Pushing away the pestering thought, I sighed tiredly and reached out to open the driver's side door. But before I was able to successfully open it up and climb inside the comfort of my car; my calculated movements were halted abruptly by the sound of an intrusive voice.

God dammit.

"Beyoncé, wait." I suddenly heard from behind me, followed by a tightened grip against my forearm that inevitably prevented me from climbing inside my car. Reasonably feeling an overwhelming sense of mixed emotions by the unexpected action; I quickly whipped around and shot Shawn the nastiest expression imaginable, before angrily pinching my brows together and hastily parting my lips.

I was beyond prepared to aggressively give him a piece of my mind, but of course Shawn was too quick to beat, and he miraculously managed to avoid my venomous words by speaking before I was able to.

"Hol' up. Just hold up for a minute. Before you wreak havoc on me, just let me speak for a minute." Shawn quickly interrupted. My hardened glare didn't dare let up, and I proceeded to stare at Shawn angrily as he hesitated to explain himself.

"What, Shawn?! Dammit, what do you want?!" I snapped furiously, growing increasingly more frustrated the longer Shawn remained silent. He had mindfully ruined our departure by willingly setting off this forsaken conversation once again; therefore he didn't have any option but to provide me with a reasonable explanation for his actions.

I wasn't sure if Shawn understood exactly what I had said due to lack of response, but he could easily tell how noticeably agitated I was.

"Just calm down for a minute, Bey." Shawn spoke calmly as he briefly eyed my demeanor, before slowly loosening his grip on my arm. "You gotta chill out, because we both know this conversation ain't getting anywhere if you stay raising hell against me."

"Fuck you." I spat.

I jerked my arm completely out of Shawn's grip and angrily stepped back. And with perfect timing, my tears soon emerged beneath my aching eyelids, and I snarled irritably before harshly wiping them away.

"Bey... please ma."

"Stop." I mumbled, though I knew Shawn hadn't understood me. My head was lowered significantly, and I was trying to focus my attention on a barely noticeable blemish against the pavement. It was a sorry attempt to distract myself, which evidently wasn't working; yet I showed no signs of letting up anytime soon.