Falling Beginning

Chapter 45.

Crumbles

[Nea's POV]

I didn't see Adam at all when I'm back at home after we have a huge fight. Mum and Dad are away for a business meeting again and Sara looks apologetic to me for the whole day. Leia also decided to stay the night for me. The boys are trying to find Adam, but they didn't have any clue where he is. I am thankful that they decided to stay with me but I shouldn't be a nuisance to them.

The next day I went back home, my home. I couldn't hide my sorrow but as usual, I didn't speak any of it. Bella decided to stay with me for a while and Fay keeps checking on me when she's back from school. I feel like I give trouble to all of them now and my heart gets heavier each time.

I am sitting on a swing at the park near my house when Bella came to me.

"Want to talk? I'll make sure I listen until the end." Bella's voice pleading me to open up.

"We had a fight. I can't open up to him and he wanted me to, desperately. He wanted to know everything, but I bet he already know by now. He said he'll give me time and won't give up, but he's given up by now." I stop for a breather and Bella keeps her promise to listen till the end. This is the first time I decided to open up to her about my thoughts and problems.

I told her everything that happens on the day we went back home after the exam until two days ago when Adam went away. I waited for a response from Bella and she sighs a little.

"You can be mean sometimes Nea. You push people away, the one who actually cares for you. I don't blame you, but it's true Adam is hurt when you didn't say anything when he asks you whether you trust him or not. Who wouldn't be? I would be hurt by it too."

My tears fall non-stop and Bella sits in front of me as she wipes my tears away, "I'm not blaming you. You've your own thinking, but it's not good to push people away. Our family, Tia, and Mark have known you forever but it doesn't mean we didn't get hurt when you push us away. But, Adam is your husband, your other half, of course, he demands to know everything about you. Especially when you guys are in the middle of learning about each other."

I choked on my words, "I know everything's my fault."

"No, everything doesn't happen one-sidedly. Adam has his own fault and so do you. To make your relationship work, both of you have to fight for each other. He's trying to fight for you before and I believe now it's your turn to fight for him. And open up your heart, I know you have fallen in love with him, so did he Nea, He's fallen in love with you. That is why he's hurt when you push him away."

My sob getting heavier and Bella hugs me tighter, "Fight for your love, Nea. Don't give up and believe each other." I nod as I cry to her shoulder.

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I am now in Lucas's car with Sara and William on the way back to University for a Summer session I which only has a month or so of classes because it's a short semester. Adam is still not back and even has contact with me, he did contact the other boys for their business but he stops when they mention me.

I know it's my fault.

I didn't have time to go and meet Adam since there's a lot to do in this short semester, in addition to my quickie jobs. Sara and the boys occasionally came to give me support and they give me an update on Adam. I am thankful that they still stay with me although Adam is their actual friend when I am only an addition to their group.

I have tried to reach Adam a few times, but it's either I suddenly got busy or he's the one busy. He's a senior of course he'll be busier than me, so I decided to give him time and I will find him and beg if I have to. To fight for him, and our relationship like what Bella says and Luke actually says it too.

It's a week until the next break and I ask for the boys help to give me and Adam space to talk. And they are more than happy to help, so here I am now in front of his apartment. I was told that Adam is in for the day, saying he has works to be settled.

What should I say?? Hey Adam, how are you? Like freaking stupid, of course, he's not okay. He's hurt, you hurt him. Should I apologize first or should I confess first? Oh my god, my heart is about to explode! Damn!

I push the doorbell and it rang, I heard footsteps and I am smiling to greet Adam although tears are about to form. The door open and I open my mouth to apologize, but I stopped when I see a woman standing in front of it. My eyes widen and I gulp down air.

Emily.

My hand trembling and my eyes wander around as I begin to hyperventilating. I look at her and the house numbers a few times to make sure it's the right house.

"Yes, may I help you?" She smiles softly while I lost my voice and myself at the moment.

"Who is it Em?" I heard Adam yell from his room and I take a step back almost fell when Emily caught me by the arm.

"Are you okay?" Emily sound worried and I nod.

"Are you looking for someone?" She looks at my face to recognize me.

"W..William. I'm looking for William." My voice cracks and I smile, lying while my heart breaks to thousand inside.

"Oh, Will, he's not home. Maybe if you could leave a note, I'll pass it to him later."

"No, it's okay. I'll just meet him at college tomorrow."

"Okay then, take care." Emily smiles brightly.

"You too." My voice is shaky as I walk away towards the elevator.

I plop down once I'm in the elevator as my tears roll down silently. I didn't care about the stare that I got as I walk back to the dorm. All I do know is that my world has crumbled down. There's no hope and I sit on the bench somewhere secluded in the University area silently.

My phone vibrates and I slide down to pick up the call, as I register what's has been told to me I regain my composure, "I'll get ready professor. Thank you."

I scramble back to the dorm, packing up all of my things and there's actually not much of a thing, to begin with. Its as if I know that I won't be here for long and we're not actually meant to be together.

I am now in front of Adam's apartment, I look at the door longingly as I put a white envelope in front of the door. I take a step back and my tears dropping non-stop again. My heart aches as I walk away defeatedly.

I'm sorry for everything. Be happy Adam. – Nea

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