She pulled up to the privately owned cemetery, her heart feeling as if it was jump out of her chest at any given moment. She parked the car near the open gates and she sat for a moment, staring out into the small cemetery, thinking about the girl she had fallen for in so little time and still felt love for to this very day. After tragedy had struck her life all those years ago, she had gotten out as soon as possible, picking up on different roles in various television shows and movies she had been offered parts in, and she truly never got to cope with the loss of the vivacious girl who gave her one of the best summers she had ever experienced in her life. She had returned to her childhood town not only to say goodbye to Zoe, but her recently deceased grandfather as well. He had taken care of her in her darkest moments of grief, and she never really got the chance to thank him for all that he did for her throughout their incredibly dark moments in her life, so that's what she was going to do now, to ease her own mind. She took the keys out of the ignition and put them into the pocket of her coat, throwing the door open carefully so she wouldn't completely bottom out once she stood on her shaky legs. She leaned against the side of the door for many moments and two curious sets of eyes on her downward posture is what forced her up straight once more, taking a deep breath before she opened the door to the backseat, nearly being knocked over by by two very small but very strong bodies. She let them explore the new place for a few minutes, trying to work up the courage to actually step inside the sad area. When she did, she grabbed her children's hands and held on to them as tightly as she could without hurting them and she put one boot over the entrance.
"C'mon mama." Her youngest daughter Marie, who she had named after her grandmother, hissed as she tugged at the bottom of her navy blue dress to make her start to move again. Her son Elliot said nothing, he just looked up at her with those curious big blue eyes he had to have gotten from his sperm donor. She took one more long and shaky breath, before she willed her legs to move forward until they knew exactly where to stop and where to kneel. Zoe's tombstone was beautiful, and the inscription her parents did really made the stone look much more sentimental, but she felt something was... missing. Which is why she moved her hair away from her shoulder and retrieved the photograph from her breast pocket, sitting it carefully against the base of the weather worn stone. She tilted her head to look at it, and she felt a sad smile stretch across her chapped lips as memories of the day came flooding back to her in bits and pieces. A chocolate waffle cone. A lipstick stained kiss. A hug. A promise. The feeling of falling in love. She reached up to wipe away the tears that were threatening to spill down her cheeks and she gave her two little angels the happiest smile that she could muster, drawing them in close to her body and telling them that they had their own angel, and that her name was Zoe. They clung to her as she recounted the fondest memories she had of the brunette, which were many, and they smiled when she told them they would have adored her if they got the chance to meet her.
"What happened to her mommy?" Elliot finally spoke, which slightly startled her seeing as it had been so long since he had last spoken that she had forgotten what his small voice sounded like, and she looked over at him to see if he had actually spoken, but his eyes were transfixed on the stone in front of them, his eyes no doubt reading over the words carved into the beautiful white marble.
"Well, she had to leave for a little while, but she'll be watching over you until we see her again. She would have loved you both so much, and I'm sad you never got to know her like mommy did. But I can tell you all about it on the drive to see grammy, would you like that?" Both of the small blonde children eagerly nodded their heads and she each sweetly kissed them on the forehead before rising to her feet once again.
"Elliot, why don't you take your sister to the car? Mommy will be there in a second." She turned away from them to look back at the stone in front of her, and they listened to her rules, walking back to the small car hand in hand and climbing inside, watching her from their window.
"I'm sorry I haven't come to visit.. I know that you're probably really disappointed with me but you have to know that being without you... it was and still is so so torturous. You had your whole life ahead of you, you fucking deserved to get out of that shithole and make something for yourself. You were so special and you still are, even though most people have forgotten about what your smile looks like or the way that you laugh or the way your eyes crinkle when you talked about the things that you were passionate about. But I haven't, and I know that I never will. Because you are in my heart and in every thought that I have, and I want you to know that I will never love any other person the way that I loved you Zoe Benson. My sweet summer girl, oh how I loved and continue to love you. There will never be anyone else but you." She said in a shaky voice, her tears making home on the ground underneath her knees, which she hadn't even remembered kneeling on again. She pressed two fingers to her lips and touched the marble ever so slightly, hoping that wherever she was waiting for her, Zoe had received it. She had never believed in anything after life, but there was a special place for people like Zoe and her grandparents, a place where they were at peace and living painlessly, and she needed that reminder to keep her sane. Otherwise, she would lose her mind and her children all at once and that was the last thing that she wanted.
'I will, I promise. And you're right, I do love them." She heard a voice save from over her shoulder, and she didn't have to look to know that somehow it was Zoe reassuring her, and that was the one thing she needed in the world right now. She dusted her knees off and stood up, looking down at the inscription once more.
Here Lies Zoe Benson;
A lover, a daughter, and a friend; but also the greatest treasure you could ever think about receiving.
March 19th 1995- August 23rd 2013
She smiled softly once again before she whispered a final goodbye and blew a kiss out into the wind,turning on her heel and walking back to her car, where her family was waiting for her. She climbed inside the car and appeared strong to her kids, before taking the keys from her pocket and sticking them back into the ignition, turning the engine over and pulling out of the cemetery, not even seeing the ghostly figure of the girl she had loved so long ago, waving with a sad smile on her eternally heartbroken features.
A/N: This sucks ass but at least it's something lol, next part will probably be a smut cus i really DON'T want tori to slap me ty. Anyways, please vote and comment as it keeps me motivated to update you lovely readers with more one shots! Hope you all are well x.
Also, thank you so much for all of your support on all of my ongoing(and finished) works, it means so much to me!!
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