WHY TRY? [peter parker]

015.

    THE MOON IS SHINING outside Eleanor's bedroom. She sits in her bed as she watches the sky, patiently waiting for a star to show up. Her dad hasn't come home yet and as usual, she feels worried for her father. The girl rests her chin between her knees, thinking about what could his father be hiding behind her back.

Eleanor knows her father very well and she's pretty sure Ron is hiding something. She doesn't want to annoy him so she pretends to not notice anything weird about him.

The girl glanced at her side table, she opened the drawer and saw a familiar pink journal she had ever since fifth grade. She cracked a smile while remembering all the stupid things she did just to keep this journal a secret.

Her face crunches up while reading her cringeworthy journal confessions. Eleanor turns a page and her heart drops.

Dear journal,

I met a cute boy today! He was an Iron Man fanboy with his Iron Man lunchbox. I had the courage to go talk to him and I'm really glad how it turned out. He was smiling the whole time and I can really tell we're going to be friends for a very long time. Well, I hope so.

All we talked about is Tony Stark and that's it. I hope we can talk about other things though.

I know this seems weird but I've only known him for a day but I would totally rob all of the stars for him.

Love, El.

Eleanor smiles at herself but felt a pang of sadness when she realized that she was wrong. Their friendship lasted for a very short time and she wishes she can bring back time just to feel the happiness and giddiness she felt when she was with him.

But even if she chooses to bring back time, she would still feel the sadness and the heartbreak she felt when he started distancing himself from her. She would feel it all over again. She skips through pages of her journal and went to the last page.

Dear journal,

This is my last entry. I don't want to write here anymore since I'm kinda too old for this.

My friendship with Peter Parker officially ended. After all the efforts I did to keep our friendship strong, it still wasn't enough. He didn't put enough effort between us. So I did what he did, distanced myself from him.

It's heartbreaking because I thought our friendship would last forever and we would be best buddies till the day we die. I hate this feeling, I hate crying over him, I hate it when people who I love ends up leaving me or hurting me.

We didn't even have a bad friendship! Everything was good between us. I don't understand why this had to happen. What did I do wrong? Was I a bad friend? I just don't know.

From now on, I dislike Peter Parker. I dislike people who broke my heart.

Eleanor cracks a sad smile, her last entry on her journal was full of innocence. She didn't understand how people in high school sometimes drifts away from each other. But now she understands better and she's mad at herself for hoping too much about her friendship with Peter.