Stress relief

What the fuck is up my dudes?

Haha there's been excessive swearing lately huh? Remember the days when I could actually be bothered to censor it all? Yeahhhhhhh. I mean my language has always been pretty bad but I figured that most of the people reading this are prolly younger peeps and I didn't want it to be intimidating or whatever. I've just given up now.

So. Me's got a sleep over with the friends next week, the days changed like 6 times but we've got it covered now (or at least we think we do). Plan on fangirling with a friend who recently got into bnha. If you know what that is and ur a fan you need to dm me and we must discuss. ASAP.

Been listening to some hella chill Chris Cornell lately and damn. Nostalgia. Kinda wanna do some art butttttt ugh. Effort. Should be stressing coz I've got about 3 weeks left of holidays (one of which will be spent on a house boat with my fam) and I haven't even bought my booklist yet. Jsjcjdjfjjdksjslcmckso. Virtual stress relief isn't the same and real stress relief, I need to hit a gym and fucken go all out but it's too lateeeeeee. Maybe tomorrow, my membership expired like a week ago though, fuck. Guess I'm borrowing my sister's.....

Recently I've realised that I really can't wait to be done with school and have my own place to live even if it's just an apartment somewhere like just a space that I can call my own and wow. I know everyone says 'enjoy your youth and don't take it for granted. Bills suck.' Like yeah I know youth is great and some people really struggle with paying bills but I think that it would still be nice to just be able to go out and actually have my own life? Like not having to think about homework. Maybe I'd still be in uni or maybe I'd be done already but my stresses would be different because I'd still be free. Like I wanna be able to go out some where random at 6:00 at night and not come home until 11 and meet people I don't know because yeah, I'm socially awkward but I'm always more confident if I'm wearing makeup or wearing clothes that I like. My personal style is more like ripped jeans and a flannel with a beanie or an exclusively black outfit that I chose.

I don't think it's wrong to want freedom at my age. But something tells me that if I was coming home to my own space instead of a cramped little house with 3 other people and schoolwork it would feel so much better. I wanna go get more piercings just because I can and find some rock concert and go alone because I want to meet someone with a similar passion and get to know them. I don't want parents breathing down my neck saying "you can't wear those ripped pants, you look tacky" or "you already have five piercings! Why would you want more? You'll regret it when you're older" and you know so what if I regret it when I'm older? I'd rather be 50 with a bunch of really small holes in my ears that I enjoyed when I was younger than have spent my time feeling repressed and looked down on only to end up with a shitty job that I didn't want because I was being rushed into knowing where I wanted to be.

I know the world revolves around money and status but honestly I'd be happy to save up money and just move somewhere completely different. I could still have a house here but I'd like to go somewhere that's just different and amazing. I know people say America is going to shit or something and "don't go there. Students are poor and don't have healthcare" like yeah and? I'd rather be a 24 year old poor tourist just wandering around and having a good time than be stuck in a place that's supposed to be my home but feels suspiciously like some really small cramped box with rules that tell me what I can't and can't do within this box. Honestly I might go to another country with a few thousand dollars to spend and end up regretting it and not experiencing what I thought I would but the point it that it was my decision. No one could tell me not to and no one could stop me.

I might not get everything I want, life doesn't tend to work out that perfectly but I think even the simple things would be good. Like honestly I'm thinking of just betraying my parents and going to do some things myself. Like I think you can get piercings without a parent signing it if you're 16 or over and guess what? I'm 16 bitches. Like it'd suck for school because "one piercing per ear" or whatever but I've been blowing that rule off for years. Although the principal now knows who I am because one the chick that never listensssssss. Oh well, I could tie my hair in a way that covers at least the top half of my ears and then take out two of my lobe ones so they can only see one in each, only for the special occasions though ;).
~
Okay so this next bit I'm writing like a day later because I figured if I was gonna add to it, do it when I'm less of an angsty teen.

So some friends of mine went for a bike ride around my area and they went to have lunch at the local shopping centre (mall if you're American) and deadass they called me on their way back and were like "aye you want us to buy you bubble tea? I'll shout and ur house is like 5 mins away" and of course I was like "HELL YEAH I DO". So basically I'm getting free bubble tea just because my friends went out. Fucken love friendship. They're on their way here now but knowing who they are they'll probably get lost.

Anyway. This post is about a thousand words so imma stop here, I plan on making my posts a little longer because it doesn't take a whole lot of editing or time to write them and I kinda feel bad about my short 300 word updates from before. You guys deserve better.

I have another story but I'll leave it for the next one. I'll post it either later today or tomorrow but I'll see.

Have a good one!

~Spirit o(^_-)O