midnight chats [hetalia chatfic]

thirty nine

(Nordic 5 but not Iceland)

sticky whore: Nordic meeting, now

local drug dealer: WHAT'S WRONG??

lock drug dealer: SORRY COCK BLOCK

local drug dealer: COCK BLOCK

local drug dealer: I DON'T WANT TO SAY COCK BLOCK I WANT TO SAY COCK BLOCK

local drug dealer: C A P L O C K

local drug dealer: COCK BLOCK

ppap: OSHUEHWUYWKSDEBUI

Emil: WHASDWD WHATS THIS

local drug dealer: IVE GOT COCK BLOCK

ppap: ICWNWID ICANT BREAATHEBSGXWEJKJ

Emil: Finland, did you leave your phone in the kitchen last night??

local drug dealer: YES AND NOW I HAVE THE COCK BLOCK ENABLED

Emil: Who did this?? 👀

ppap: Before you all point your nasty fingers at me, I was not home last night, nor am I home now

SneakySve: I would never hurt wife like this :(

sticky whore: Finland uses his phone in the bathroom, I would never touch it without cutting off at least 6 of my fingers

Emil: Then who??

ppap: DIDNT ESTONIA COME VISIT US YESTERDAY??

Emil: How would you know if you weren't home??

ppap: That's the reason I left jskfhlhcni

local drug dealer: THAT MOTHERFUCKER MUST'VE CHANGED COCK BLOCK TO COCK BLOCK

sticky whore: Anyway, nordic 👏 meeting 👏

Emil: Please no, I'm watching a movie right now

sticky whore: Oh, don't worry. To make sure we can all be 100% comfortable, we'll discuss everything in this group chat :)

local drug dealer: HURRAY

sticky whore: See? Finland is excited

local drug dealer: I CANT EXPRESS MY SARCASM WITH COCK BLOCK

SneakySve: Wife :( please be nice

local drug dealer: :( FUCK OK

sticky whore: Alright, so to start this meeting off, we'll address the issues we all see in our countries, what similarities we see after comparing them, and a possible solution

sticky whore: Would anyone like to start??

ppap: GUYS LMAO GUESS WHAT

ppap: THEYRE PLAYING THAT ABBA SONG IN THE PUB IM IN AFIFUWEHFR

SneakySve: I love ABBA :O

SneakySve: Which song?

ppap: I CANT REMEMBER WHAT ITS CALLED, ILL TYPE OUT THE LYRICS AS I HEAR THEM

ppap: END OF THE RAINBOW WITH A FORTUNE TO WIN ITS SO DIFFERENT FROM THE WORLD IM LIVING IN

ppap: Do you remember it??

SneakySve: TIRED OF TV I OPEN THE WINDOW AND I GAZE INTO THE LIGHT BUT THERES NOTHING THERE TO SEE NO ONE IN SIGHT

ppap: THERES NOT A SOUL OUT THEEERRREEE

SneakySve: NO ONE TO HEAR MY PRAAAAYYYYEERRRR

local drug dealer: GIMME GIMME GIMME A MAN AFTER MIDNIGHT WONT SOMEBODY HELP ME CHASE THE SHADOWS AWAY

sticky whore: GIMME GIMME GIMME A MAN AFTER MIDNIGHT TAKE ME THROUGH THE DARKNESS TO THE BREAK OF THE DAY

sticky whore: Little brother, sing with us

Emil: Wtf no

SneakySve removed and banned Emil from the group

ppap: That's what u get for being a turd

ppap: HOLY SHIT THE GUY THAT SERVES THE DRINKS SAW HOW EXCITED I GOT WHEN THAT SONG CAME UP THAT HE TOLD THE PUB OWNER AND THEY AGREED ON HAVING AN ABBA MARATHON PARTY RIGHT NOW

ppap: Because I'm a regular customer here :D

SneakySve: Where are you??

ppap: (location)

SneakySve: See you in a couple of minutes :)

ppap: But the pub is an hour away from home

SneakySve: SEE YOU IN A COUPLE OF MINUTES :)

sticky whore: You know what, fuck the meeting, let's fucking go listen to ABBA

local drug dealer: IM FUCKING READY

sticky whore: Should we invite Iceland??

SneakySve: No

local drug dealer: OF COURSE NOT

ppap: LET HIM ROT

sticky whore: :')