midnight chats [hetalia chatfic]

thirty one

Part 2....

a couple months later....

(let's find out who mattie's friend is)

🖖👾alfred: so

🖖👾alfred: figure anything out??

daddy: About what?

🖖👾alfred: omg wHAT IS THE GROUP CHAT'S NAME??

 daddy: Oh. Uh, no

🖖👾alfred: shit man, it's been like 3 months since we began our inVESTIGATION

daddy: Why are we even doing this???

🖖👾alfred: don't you wanna know??? besides, he could be in sTRANGER DANGER

daddy: It's not like this guy did something to him

daddy: Apparently they're good friends. That's it. Not your problem 

🖖👾alfred: huh

🖖👾alfred: um well ig you gotta point

daddy: Daddy's always right

🖖👾alfred: stfu u kinky old man

daddy:  

🖖👾alfred: i shouldn't've educated u about memes

(private chat between armrick ((🖖👾alfred)) and maple slut  (mapleboi))  )

armrick:  hey bro

maple slut:  Hey

armrick: uh how's things with ur friend going??

maple slut: Oh,  after all this time you still wanna keep insisting??

armrick: nah actually. sorry about that. wasn't our business 

maple slut: Oh um that's ok

maple slut: And yeah, everything's good

armrick: ey that pretty g00d

maple slut: I don't know, but he's actually a pretty great guy, in case you're worried about that

armrick: plz tell me more °3°

maple slut: Um??? Ok

maple slut: Uhh he's got a lot of shit going on in his life but tbh me too, so we kinda just rant about stuff to each other 

maple slut: He says he only talks about this with me because of the "anonymity of social media" and that we're probably not gonna meet irl so like, fuck it

maple slut: Sorry if I'm boring you with this, I don't have anyone else to talk to

armrick: dw

maple slut: So I ask him "Why not?"

maple slut: And he's like "Wait wot you actually wanna meet me?"

maple slut: So I say "Um of course, I wanna meet the guy that calls me at 5 am showing me a  flute solo they composed dedicated to 'the shittiest couple in history, get rekt u Austrian p00sy' featuring his brother on drums , his brother's best friend on the guitar, and his brother's best friend's brother on the tambourine, strapped onto a chair because he's pissy af"

armrick: lmao what the fuck??

maple slut: I know right??

armrick: like, videocall or normal call

maple slut: Ring ring phone call

armrick: do u even know what he looks like??

maple slut: Ummmm actually here's the problem- we're both lowkey insecure about that so we never even bothered. He never said that though, but his silence said quite enough

armrick: oof

maple slut: Anyway

maple slut: So he gets all excited and bAsiCALLY SHOUTs AND STARTS PLANNING ALL THIS STUFF AND HE'S LIKE "WHO'S GOING WHERE??"  because shortly after the bathroom stall thing he had to go back to Germany because he lives there and I'm like "Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm" because Canada is so nice to see and there's so many places to go that he'd like so much, but it's been years since I've went to Germany  hnggggggg and he say he's got so many cool places to show me, I don't wanna let him down

maple slut: Actually, we're talking about that right now

armrick: want my advice?

maple slut: No

armrick: go to america

maple slut: We both end up losing because we BOTH have to pay for plane tickets

maple kid: I mean, I'm not the one with the problem. I can afford it just fine. Country benefits. But what if he can't afford it??

armrick: i'll pay for it lmao

maple slut: Wouldn't that be a lot of money??

armrick: gotta do smth with all this illegal money im winning tbh

maple slut: .....

armrick: IM FUCKING JOKING VSKDHS YOU NORMIE

maple slut: YOU'RE THE WORST

maple slut: But umm, thank you :)

maple slut: This might sound a little too.... eh... but I'm really happy. I haven't had a friend in such a long time. I'm so excited 😄😄

armrick: you can count on me, little bro

maple slut: Hey um

armrick: what

maple slut: I'm the older brother

armrick: im

armrick: nahh u fucking messing with me stfu

maple slut:  ......

maple slut: Yeah, you're right. It's just a prank, bro

armrick: that's so old tho

maple slut: You know what, bye Alfred

armrick: how'd you get my number??? WHO ARE YOU???

maple slut: GOODBYE