Secrets

Chapter 72

Louis' POV 

I'm kind of surprised that Allison went through with getting the tattoo. I'm kind of happy that she did though. I think it's sexy that she got it. I know she got it for me. I'm going to be the only person seeing it. I mean no one is with her like I am. I know she wouldn't be with anyone else. I think it's crazy how much she loves me despite everything. Especially after everything that I've told her. I know she just says that it's my past and I'm nothing like that now. I feel like if I would have told anyone else other than her about it all they would have left.

I honestly don't know what I would do if she left me. I don't want to think about it but I fear that. I fear that one day she'll leave me and want nothing to do with me. I know she has the same fear. She's told me about it before. I'm not going anywhere unless she makes me. I love her so damn much. I never knew I could love someone like I love her. I never knew I could have lust for someone like I do for her. I know she doesn't know it but I really do love being with her like that and if I could I would be with her like that all the time. I'm looking forward to the weekend. I know I'll be with her like that all weekend. I want to show her how much I love her and care about her then. I know I can prove it to her like that. I know it's just going to be us with no one around. No one to show up and interrupt us. I feel like she's going to be happy about this weekend too. I'm happier about it now that she has a ring on her left ring finger. I know it's only a promise ring right now but I'm hoping it's not going to stay that way for much longer. I know she's agreed to getting engaged even with what she thinks. I understand that we're both young. I don't really care about or ages though. I know she's the one. I don't want anyone else but her. Honestly when she was getting her tattoo I didn't like how close Tom had to be to her and how he had to touch her. I was extremely jealous in there. I'm sure that she noticed. I'm happy she didn't bring it up like I thought she would. I know he was just doing that for his job but I still didn't like it. Like how Allison didn't like it if Lauren tried to move closer to me. I honestly didn't like that either. I don't like her and I never have. I just felt bad that she was trying so hard. I have a feeling that she's working with Jace now since her boyfriend is. I don't think they're really together though. I know Jace wouldn't put up with that. 

If I was still with them he wouldn't let me be with Allison unless we had to sneak around like we do now but I know he would make me cheat on her and I can't do that. I don't think I could cheat on her. She's perfect to me and I don't think I could handle doing something like that to her. I know Lauren didn't really care when she kept coming on to me after she found out about us. I hate having to keep the fact that Joey is town from her. I feel like I should but I don't want her to worry. I don't know what she would say if I told her that the guy that was following her was him. I know he finally saw her out by herself and was probably going to try something. I have a feeling as soon as he gets the chance he's going to do something to her then him and Jace are going to try and get me to join them again. I don't want to apart of that anymore. That is my past. I want to keep it that way.

Allison is my future and I hope that it stays that way. I love her. I want to be married to her one day and for us to start our own family. I know she wants to wait awhile before any of that but I don't. I understand why she wants to wait though. I hope we can start all of that after her graduation then we don't have to stay a secret. We can be open about us then and I won't have to worry about getting in trouble. I don't worry about that too much anymore. I know me and Allison are careful about what we do. If we did get caught I don't think I would even care. I would probably be happy that we could be open about us. I know it would cause a lot bad attention towards us though. 

At her graduation I plan on being completely open about us. I know nothing can be done about it there. I love going to the lake house with her now. I know around there no one knows us and we can be as open as we want in public. I mean around here we have to watch and make sure no one we know is around or if we're going to get caught by someone like my boss. I know they've already had to investigate us being together before. I really hope that we don't have to go through that again. I mean from what they said it was only Lauren that has said anything about us and they think she was just mad. I hope they just keep thinking that. I'm sure they will as long as we keep going the way that we are. I'm so happy that she's with me though.