Wasting Time

15

A few more days passed, and I still hadn't heard from my brothers. I had always had this fear that no one in my family had really cared about me, save a few exceptions. 

I waited for the post at breakfast. The paper came and the owls left and nothing. I stood up and went to leave, tears filling my eyes. Sirius walked in as I was about to leave. I threw myself into his arms.

"What's wrong?"

"It's been days and I haven't even heard from them! It's like they don't even care. They're my family, they should've owled me or something by now!" I said into his chest.

"Welcome to the club, baby," he said awkwardly. I pulled away from him and smacked his chest.

"Are you serious?" I asked.

"What? Baby, it's funny! It's what Andromeda said to me after I ran away."

"Oh my god, I can't believe you! Can't you just say something, or a gesture, or something!" I stormed past him out of the kitchen. I walked outside and lit a cigarette. I could hear James chastising Sirius through the window.

"What does she want from me man? I don't know what to say about family shit."

"She just wants you to make her feel better! Anything would be better than what you just did," James told him, sounding frustrated.

"She expects too much from me. How am I supposed to know what she wants?"

"You just are. She told you exactly what was going on, it's not like she was playing coy or anything."

There was a beat of silence and I took a long drag of my cigarette.

"How do i fix it?"

"I don't know. You can't just say something nice now, you gotta make a gesture. Shave that stupid beard or something. Actually, don't do that. She thinks it's sexy."

"You're no help Prongs!"

"Well, she's not my girlfriend. You need to figure that out. I'm not the one who told her to join the club of family issues."

I moved away from the window. I didn't want to hear Sirius's response. I wiped tears from my eyes and took another drag of my cigarette. Was this who I was now? Just a member of the fucked up family club? Just another orphan the Potters took in? Fuck Sirius.

"Welcome to the club," I scoffed to myself. Fuck the club.