Shawn Mendes Imagines

Cut Short

Just a quick little sad imagine because I don't have enough of these.

My breathing heavy and my vision blurry, I let the words I spent the entire night conjuring, spill out. "I can't do this. Not anymore." My voice cracks, a sign of weakness. No matter if I wanted to be strong, to be the bigger person, I knew the heart break was on me.

I was ending it. It was my fault. It was my lack of acceptance with the life i was given by a man I love more than life itself. But, people get to you. Comments get to you. The rumours, assumptions. The family members asking for an autograph from your boyfriend, no longer a relative but a supplier.

I was no longer asked the question at dinner. You know, have you got a boyfriend question. I got my boyfriend, and it was great. For the few moments before the relationship was put out to the world. After, my family, friends, people I never even talked to began to hit me up. Asking for tickets, for times to catch up.

"But make sure Shawn is there. I want to get a photo."

"Oh, hi dear, how's Shawn? I'm sure he's busy but do you mind finding a suitable time for me to catch up with him? And you of course but I was wanting to show my girlfriends."

"We went to school together. Remember? Yeah, I sat with you in bio. Anyway, how are you? How's, Shawn?"

I didn't want to endure the hetic lifestyle anymore. I thought I could handle it. With Shawn always reasurring me and the small vacations away from the public every now and again helped. But soon, nothing in my life was private anymore. I could no longer have privacy, I could no longer live a normal life.

And sure, some people would die to be in a relationship with a celebrity. Thinking the glitz and glam is all that. But it isn't. It gets to you. It always gets to you. Once your name is in headlines, spoken in interviews and plastered all over social media, you're no longer a person.

You're treated with some respect from your supporters, yes but, then there are people who claim they know you. Posting false remarks and hating on you behind a screen. I could block them. Tune them out. But that only gets you so far.

Soon, you're getting verbally abused in public. Items thrown your way because they think they deserve to be in your shoes. And you know what I say? Have them. I no longer want them.

"We can work this out? Go on a trip, have some time to ourselves, away from everything. We'll go longer this time." He was trying not to break. I could tell by the glaze in his eyes. By the quiver in his lips and by the way he hands hover by my waist, unsure if he could touch me again.

"Time catches up, Shawn. And soon enough, we're back out there." I inhale a weak, shaky breath. "I know I should ignore it, not let it get to me. But it's hard." I choke on my words as tears begin to stream down my face.

I finally break, collapsing into his safe arms. Cradled and soothed, I hear him break too. I feel his touch, soak in his warm and inhale his musky scent. I didn't what to lose this but there wasn't any other way.

"I love you." He whispers, as though it would fix everything. As though all my thoughts and emotions would be flipped and I would be okay. And the sad thing, I wished it worked. But I found myself pulling away from his tender embrace.

"I'm sorry, Shawn." Wiping at my eyes with my shaking hands, I look away from his heartbroken eyes, his eyebrows furrowed and his lips curled into a deep frown that made my heart ache.

"Please, y/n." He reaches out to me, his eyes pleading into mine. I take one hard look into his honey eyes, memorising every speck of gold. I take in his silky hair and the way it felt through my fingers. I look to his plump, rosy lips, now softly quivering as I remember them pressed sweetly to mine. At times hungrily. And then I take him all in and close my eyes, letting a sob shake my body as I shake my head, my decision final.

"I'm sorry, I have to go." Knowing if I stayed I wouldn't leave this room, I pick up my bag and head for the door, his hurried footsteps following closely behind.

"Why didn't you tell me?" My back to him, I stop, clenching my jaw. "Everyone else knew you were ready to go. Knowing when you'd arirve home but you left me in the dark. Why? Why did you shut me out? Please." His voice whimpers as I fight back another surge of tears.

Inhaling a deep breath, I bite my lip and let a hot tear fall.
"Because," I begin. "You're the only person to convince me otherwise. And I couldn't let that happen." My heart aches further at my words.

"Let me convince you." He pleads. I shake my head and open the front door, his hand gently clasping my forearm.
"You're everything to me." I had to leave, now. "I waited for someone like you to come into my life. I waited for you and when I got you, I didn't want to let go. I don't want to let go. You've given me everything I never knew I needed." He lets out a heavy cry, his nose sniffling, his hand weakening on my arm.

"You gave me someone to wake up next to. Someone who will wash my back in the shower." He chuckles softly. "You gave me a reason to continue. To keep doing what I do. You're not only my girlfriend or my best friend. You're my person." His hand drops and I hear the sobs that tremble his body.

"I'm sorry." I step out of the door into the apartment complex corridor. I don't dare look over my shoulder. "Don't forget me when you reach the top, okay." I begin to walk away as his words ghost behind me.

"I already have, with you."

I feel like this is really bad but I have some inspo and this is the outcome. Will post another imagine tomorrow, probably part two of 'In My Head,' as I know you've been wanting it xx