Dance for me

68

Cookie

"So Hopes opening date will be pushed back till further notice. I really wanted the grand opening this weekend but due to certain circumstances we can't. But I want all the ladies out here to know that you're not alone and every voice matters so use yours." I said into my camera. I ended the video and went to post it on my page.

I sighed and captioned it. "#hope 😪 it was an exciting project and I couldn't wait to share it with you all ❤️ but due to some current events I'm going to have to hold it off. #WomenEmpowerment #OurVoiceMatters #MeToo"

"You know damn well you could have had the grand opening this weekend." Kim said handing me my Chinese. I shrugged.

"It feels wrong." She gave me a look and rolled her eyes.

"It feels wrong? Your opening a place that helps abused damage, that helps with their healing process and it feels wrong? Actually it's for all women. You just don't want to open it till you know who is out." She huffed and I opened my container that had my fried wings.

"Is it so wrong that I want the person who brought me the businesses building, funded the business and pushed me to start it, to be there?"

"Onika were on our fourth date. Just face it he's not coming out anytime soon and you're just holding back your full potential. You could possibly change the world but your holding that all back." For some reason I got mad. I gathered my things in my purse.

"Mind your own Kim." I snapped at her getting off of her bed, leaving my untouched food, I walked out of the room making my way to the front door of the apartment.
•••••••

"Naelean I swear if you don't find where you put that damn book bag, you'll sure find this belt whooping ya ass. You got two minutes." I said to her before walking out of her room and slamming the door. Today wasn't my day lately I haven't had any good days. I was on the verge of running away.

As I was walking to my room I noticed drawings in the walls and doors. I stopped and stared at my walls. I inhaled as much air as I could.

"He's only one Onika. Only one." I said to myself as I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples. I looked at the walls again and felt my blood boil. Everyone has been trying me today especially these kids.

I walked in to check on baby girl and Jomei to see Jomei peacefully sleeping but baby girl was on the floor smearing toothpaste all over the carpets. She laughed and rolled in her mess. I walked over to her and picked her up.

I closed my eyes exhaling and inhaling.

"Mommy! Mommy!" Naelean screamed as she ran into the kids room Baby girl jumped and started crying. Naelean had my makeup all over her face pushing my anger off the charts.

And to top off everything, Jomei began screaming at the top of his lungs. Baby girl cries must have startled him. I put baby girl down and walked out the room.

I was actually contemplating on running out to the driveway, to my car and driving away. But I instead I went to my room and locked myself in the bathroom.
I looked at myself in the mirror and the tears came out on cue.

This was all too much on me. Too much for just me to handle. I hated Meek at this point. Letting go through birth alone, birthday parties, appointments, recitals, meetings and all other things. They weren't just my kids they were his.

But it's not like he had the chose to be locked up or not.

"Come on Cooks. You got this you've been through worse." I said to my tired self in the mirror. I sighed before walking out the bathroom back tot he kids room.