Good Enough

Julian - Faster

The last bell rings for the day, and everyone rushes to pack up so we can get the hell out of here. I make eye contact with Mia from across the room and the corner of her mouth lifts up in a smile.

I quickly grab my backpack and walk over to her, trying to talk to her before she has a chance to go.

"Got any plans after school?"

Mia raises her eyebrows and puts the last book in her bag before zipping it up. "No...why?"

"How would you like to come to your very first cross country practice?"

Mia puts the backpack over her shoulders while keeping her body towards me.

"Today?"

"Mhm. Come on, it'll be fun."

You find a way to put on a brave and and a happy face, even when you're dying  inside? Why do you do that? We all know very well what  you do to yourself. Everyone knows. Everyone. 

"I don't know...won't it be awkward?"

I start to walk out of class and Mia follows me, falling into step besides me. "No. You met like half of the team at lunch. And I'm not asking you to commit or even run today. Just come see what it's like."

Mia still doesn't look convinced and I give her my best pleading look. Damn, I don't know even know why but I really want her to come.

You must like getting distracted. Finding excuses for being the way you are. Stop. No distractions.

This isn't a distraction though. I just want her to join for the good of the team, I remind myself.

"So what do you say? Please Mia? For me?"

She rolls her eyes at me, and that's when I just know I have her.

"Fine. I'll do it."

Fifteen minutes later, Mia's sitting on a bench while the rest of us stretch. The sun is hitting down hard, and I know it'll feel even worse once we're running. But I'll just have to deal with it. Other guys on the team usually take their shirts of after a run, but I never do. And I never can.

Yeah, and who's fault is that? Fucking weak.

 I clear my throat and walk back over to Mia where she's writing in a small notebook. She looks up when she feels me standing and I gesture to her notebook.

"Taking notes?"

She closes the notebook and puts it in her back pack. "Nope."

I open my mouth to ask another question but close it when the look on her face seems guarded about whatever she was writing. It's probably better to just move on.

"So you ready to see the amazing East High cross country and track stars?"

A small smile spreads across her face, and that's when I realize three things. One: She has a really nice smile. Two: I've only seen her give small smiles. And three:  I want to make her smile fully. Eventually.

Coach blows his whistle to let us know we're about to start. I smile at Mia before jogging over to the start of the track. And as soon as the whistle blows, my feet are moving as fast as I can. I focus on what I always do. Moving fast, breathing right, and the sound of my feet against the track. Out of the corner of my eye I see 'Drea catching up to me, so I push my feet into the ground harder until I can't go any faster.

After we're done running, I let out a few deep breaths and make my way over to where Mia is still sitting on the bench. I wipe the sweat off my forehead with my hand as I approach her. She's not writing anymore.

"Damn, I thought you were fast before, but right now you were running faster than you were when I met you."

"Thanks," I say, slightly winded from the run.  "Did we convince to join?"

"I mean you didn't do anything right now but-"

"But...?" I ask hopefully.

"But I do like running," she finishes with that same small smile. Damn, maybe she doesn't know how to smile completely. 

I return her smile with one of my own. "Yay! This is exciting."

"It is?"

"Yeah not that many people sign up to just run for an hour after school."

"Well, now you have me. When are practices?"

"Everyday after school except for Fridays. Coach likes to give us a day to rest."

"Sounds good." Her phone pings from her back pocket and she fishes it out to check the message. 

Mia sighs deeply before typing a response and putting the phone back. "That was my mom. So we'll have to continue this conversation tomorrow, yeah?"

"Yup. Talk to you tomorrow."

Mia leaves, and I watch as everyone else leaves too.  I wait until I'm the only one left to jog back to the track. I'll text Mateo to pick me up in a bit...

I start to jog lightly around the track, but slowly start getting faster. And faster. And faster. 

In the end, I'm out of breath, but I can go home feeling like I've succeeded. I just need to get faster. Way faster. As fast as...

Mateo. That fast. As fast as he used to be. As fast as he is.

Right. I need to get that fast.

AN: Kind of a weird place to end this part but oh well. Nothing really exciting happening here, just more of a look into Julian's thoughts. Also: 'Drea is short for Andrea, in case that was confusing. Thanks for reading - MM