What Will Be (Chibs and Juice)

13

They sat together on the couch in silence for a moment, Juan fidgeting beside Fillip. Fillip had paused the movie, and took Juan's hand in his own, sighing, trying to find words.

"Thank you... For understanding my complicated situation." Juan was quiet and looked away from Fillips gaze.

"Lad I tol ye, and I meant it. We can take our time." He sighed again, pulling Juan to rest against him.

"It's not just that. It's all of it. You encourage me to do things that would be frowned upon otherwise. It means a lot to me that you let me just be me." Fillip simply nodded, not needing to say anything.

They sat there a little while longer just being comfortable laying with each other. This private moment of comfort, Juan knew all too well that it would end soon. A feeling of dread creeped into him and he didn't want to go back.

"What do we do when we go home?" Juan was nervous and it showed.
Fillip held him tightly and spoke softly.
"Whatever we need to do to keep ye safe and sane."

Juan was exhausted, everything they'd done today and all the anxiety took so much out of him. He tried to stay awake, tonight was their last night here.
The sound of Fillips heart, and the movement of his breathing were lulling him into secure daze and he couldn't hold his eyes open. Fillip rubbed his Mohawk and whispered. "Sleep lad. It's still early in the evening. Yer safe and I want ye to rest. I'll stay with ye." He wasn't sure if Juan was even hearing him or if he'd fallen asleep already, but he needed to say those words.

When Juan opened his eyes again it was dark out and he had to pee really bad. He tried to ease himself off of Fillips sleeping body but he still woke the man. Fillip smiled as he opened his eyes. "Ye coming back?" He yawned as he stretched.

"Yeah, just gotta pee." He whispered. Fillip nodded, eyes closing again.

When Juan returned Fillip had made his way into the kitchen. It was past dinner time so he put some noodles on to boil. He figured some quick pasta would be good for tonight. He washed the few dishes from lunch, and looked over a package of meatless meat in confusion.

"Well Juan it's 8. What do ye want to do?"

Juan thought for a bit. He didn't feel particularly small, or big at the moment. He just felt happy to be with Fillip alone. He shrugged his shoulder.

"Shower? I can't wait to put on my clean pajamas."

Fillip considered this, thinking it could be good for the both of them really to get showered and just relax before they had to make the ride back to Charming.

"Alright. Don use all the hot water." He smiled at Juan going back to his current task. "I'll try to figure out how to cook this stuff. Meatless meat, I never saw such a thing." He mumbled to himself.

Juan laughed and walked around the kitchen island and into Fillips space. He took the package from him and grabbed a pan. "I'll teach you." He smiled that smile that made Fillips knees buckle.

"I'm supposed to be takin care of ye." He chuckled playfully. He watched as Juan moved around the kitchen grabbing spices and making the concoction smell appetizing. He was astonished that the lad knew how to cook so well, while also accepting it. Juan didn't have a significant other, he never let crow eaters stay the night, he rarely ate at the club. He had to have been eating something and he didn't go out to eat often.  "Well I can take care of you sometimes you know? I like being useful."

Fillip rubbed the back of Juan's neck and kissed it gently. Juan was more useful than he knew, his presence since joining the club had been good for Fillip. He let Juan's words roll around in his head for a bit, the lad liked feeling useful. He could find ways to make him feel useful, in obvious ways that he would understand were helpful. Slowly that would raise the lads self esteem and hopefully help him outside of these walls.

Juan mixed the sauce that he'd made together with the noodles and plated it. His posture emitted pride as he held a plate out for Fillip to take. Though within seconds he curled more into himself and looked uneasily at Fillip, eyes watching him. He was nervous about the food not being good enough.

"Let's sit at the table and have a proper dinner huh? Ye've really worked hard on this." He winked.

"If you don't like it I won't be offended." Juan spoke quietly following the other to the table.

He watched with big eyes as Fillip took a bite. He curiously tried to gage his response. Fillips eyes went big and he sat down his fork, Juan tried to hold back the tears he felt prickling his eyes. He just knew he hated it.

"Juan! Why didn't ye ever tell me ye could cook boy? I've been living on takeout and crow eater cooking all this time and ye... ye made this stuff I'd never eat on my own taste amazing!" He pushed in another fork full.

Juan turned red and smiled uncontrollably his voice shaking. "Cooking is frowned upon I assumed. Men aren't supposed to cook, I never said anything. I'm super glad you like it."

"Juicy boy... this... this goes home with us. I'll commission ye to be my personal chef."

"You're teasing me?" His voice was smaller and his eyes were shy. Fillip noted this reaction. His smaller side seemed to become more prevalent when he was uncomfortable about something.

"I'm not teasing ye. Let's eat up, we both need showers."

"Oh... about that. Fil-um... Daddy?"
Fillip had noodles hanging from his mouth ridiculously, as he looked up at Juan surprised. So far his lad hadn't used the name much, but Fillip hoped he would as he got more comfortable.
He wiped his face and urged the lad to continue.

"Um... can I maybe not take a shower?"

"Ye have to shower. Why don't ye want to shower?"

"Um... um... I uh... I want to take a bath."

"Juan? Or Juan Carlos? Ye can take a bath. Just so long as ye get clean, Daddy doesn't care how ye do it."

Juan nodded but he kept fidgeting.

"Something else darlin?"

"Can you maybe, if you want too, will you help me? Juan Carlos doesn't want to go alone. Wants Daddy to help."

"Finish yer dinner, and then Daddy will help ye get nice and clean Juan Carlos. Deal?"

"Deal Daddy. I'm really glad you like dinner. I'm really glad you will help me with the bath." Juan Carlos smiled and ate some more.

"Well darlin, Daddy hopes the more comfortable we get and the more we learn, Daddy will be as useful to ye as ye are to me. I'll always help ye lad. Big or small. Out here and at the club. Ye understand?"

Juan Carlos nodded.