Before March Comes (Editing)

❄️ Chapter 34 ❄️

A/N

Hopefully this chapter isn't confusing :3

And I hope it better than the last chapter xx

Enjoy bye ly 

-xoxo

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Night before school, sometime between 11:22 pm and 11:45 pm.

"Alex!" my dad shouts.

I sit on my bed and call back, "Yeah dad?!"

He tells me that I should make sure I've got everything ready for school. I hate school with a firey passion. I used to like school you know, back when I was five and I got to bring pb & jays to school.

Now, everyone is trying so hard to grow up and fit in. At least I'll see Jason and I'll get to meet his girlfriend, finally.

I wonder what she's like. Hopefully he's treating her right or else I'll have to whoop his ass.

I roll over on my bed and switch off my bedside lamp. The room goes pitch black and I can barely see my own hand.

I look up at the ceiling and my mind slowly drifts to Feb, I haven't seen him in days. These passed days have made me realize something.

For some people they will have more than one...love. And hold onto your socks before you scream "Oh my God she said LOVVEEEE!!!" I say love all the time.

For me, the only person that I've loved are my family members. I love Jason but in a friend way. I've never loved anyone in a romantic way.

I've read a lot of books though, on what love should feel like. They say love should make you feel like you're on cloud nine. Like you would do anything for the person you love. 

I'm no love expert but..I do feel like I'm on cloud nine when I'm around him and I think I would do anything for him...And he does take my breathe away every time he looks at me. And I do wish we could..be together, romantically and physically. And I really do wish he was here right now, with me...

OH MY GOD! IS THIS LOVE?

Okay, okay...all I'm saying is that being away from him for awhile has made me realize that..I..I'm possibly in love...with him.

Possibly...I said possibly....

But I can't be in love with him! He lives on a different fricken....fricken....planet? Star? Whatever you call it. And oh yeah..HE CAN'T FRICKEN LOVE!!!

And I'm just setting myself up to get hurt, like he said. But if I don't get these feelings off my chest sooner or later, they're gonna consume me till I go mad.

You know what? I'm gonna tell him. I'm gonna tell him everything that's been on my mind. Everything I've wanted to say but keep stopping myself and I'll do it...tonight!

I sit up and turn on my lamp. The room fills with a warm yellowy-orange glow. I grab my phone quickly and the time reads, '11:29'

OH GOD!! MY eyes shoot open. In 40 minutes it'll be the 1st of March and Feb will be gone! I scramble out of bed and run to my closet. I put on an extra pair of pants over my thin pajama bottoms and grab my navy blue coat.