Craig of the Dead

38. Baby and Clive

"What?"

"Look, y-you seem like a nice g...girl and all, b-b-but I really have a lot of quest...questions... I feel like s-s-someone gave me a b-billion piece jig....jigsaw puzzle called My Li...life... and said 'Enjoy!' My n-n-name's Kyle, ri-right? Kyle or C-Craig, one of the t...two. It s-s-starts with a k, I know t....that." He looked so overwhelmed, his grey, flakey face and goo-brimmed eyes still somehow managing to look adorable, like a lost puppy in a crowd of strangers.

"Clyde, actually. But you were really close! Kyle and Craig are two of your friends from school." His question has sent a million thoughts zooming through my head. The first one being This is it, Bebe! He doesn't know you! This is your second chance!

But one quick glance at his gaunt face, contorting in confusion as he realized the one thing he thought he knew was also wrong, was enough to tell me what a horrible person I was for thinking that. Still, it did make me hope...

"Oh, s...so C—Clyde then. Not a b...bad name if I do say so mys—self. Which I am! Still..s..sucks that I couldn't even remember my name, though."

"I mean, at least you're you again! That counts."

"I guess...By the w..w..way, you s--still didn't answer my question."

"Your quest-- Oh! I'm Bebe."

"Right!" He exclaimed, his face lighting up. It looked like he wanted to jump up and strike a pose, just like he would always do when he was being a dramatic doofus, but the restraints held him in place. He scrunched up his nose for a moment, almost confused, but the look soon passed. "Right, B--bebe, because everyone at s...s...school would c--call you Bab...Baby! As a nickname!" He announced, grinning and looking pleased with himself for his discovery.

"Uh, yeah." I lied, feeling my face get hot. Not quite, Clyde. That was your nickname for me. I was Baby and he was Clive, an inside joke from a TV show we had binged together. Although recently I had heard that he had garnered the nickname Clydebaby as well. Kinda ironic, but very fitting. "Any other questions? I'm sure you got a ton."

"Oh yeah. First things first, m'lady, w--where am I?"

"I wish I could tell you. I really dunno, some facility trying to eradicate the virus. Or cure it. That's why you're here. You were--"

"B....bitten by a zombie? That explains a lot acttt...actually. Why things are s--so weird."

"Like what?"

"T...touch me, B--baby." He looked straight at me, cocking an eyebrow. I felt my cheeks flush pink. "On my hand, of c--course. Why, what d--did you think I me...meant?"

"Shut up!" I laughed, giving him a playful punch on the shoulder. I didn't realize until I pulled my now goo-covered hand back that I had landed the punch right on his bad shoulder. "I'm so sorry! Clyde, I didn't mean to, gosh, that must've hur--"

"It's okay...." His body slumped in his chair and, squeezing his eyes tightly, he gripped the edge of the arm rests. "It didn't hurt, don't s-sweat it. I guess I s..should be thank..kful for just being alive."

It didn't hurt? How did you not feel... oh, Clyde....

I stood up and ran my fingers through his dirty, matted hair, just like I used to when he'd have his tantrums. It always seemed to comfort him. I tried to ignore how easily the hair came off, tried to ignore the thick locks that had been reduced to a shell of what they once had been. "What else? Sometimes when I'm dealing with a lot of problems, it's nice to get them all out in the open. They seem less foreboding and more manageable that way. To me, at least."

"I c--can't feel anything. My hearing's muff---ffled and my eyesight is cloudy. My memories are almost com--completely gone, and the one's...ss I can see are fuzzy. My brain is a me...ss and I wish I had a trans--slator because it's really hard---d to s...spe...spee...talk. It must be annoying list--listening to me."

"It's not too bad."

"I'm so c--confused," He was sniffling now, his body quivering ever so slightly. "I don't know who I am. And part of me is t--think..king that when you blushed earlier, your ch--eeks flushed. That probably would have made them re...eally juicy and tender." Suddenly I felt the urge to stop stroking his hair and sit back in my seat. Preferably a little further away then where I was sitting. His eyes followed me as I sat back down, the hurt surfacing on his face. Sorry dude, but when you describe my blushing cheeks as juicy and tender, I kinda draw the line there. Plus, it's not like me comforting him was doing anything. If he really has no sense of touch anymore, then he probably didn't even know I was there. Now that I could see his face, his eyes shone, but not like before. They held a ravenous hunger deep inside a dead void.

"I know it's wrong, but it's n..not my fault!" He protested. "I'm sssss...soo hungry! C...cow meat is gross. I want the real th--thing! I want to eat--t real flesh, not animal meat! Ba..aby, I'M ST...TARVING! AFT--TER EVERYTHING I'VE BEEN THROUGH I AT...T LEAST DESERVE A small...meal...where are you going?....please don't leave me..." I had already sprung from my chair and made it halfway across the room. Maybe this wasn't a good idea. Maybe there isn't enough Clyde left to salvage.

"Clyde, I think I'm going to go. You're kinda scaring me."

"I can't help it!" He cried, desperately fighting against his restraints in an attempt to reach me. "Baby, it's s...something ins--side of me! I want it to get out--t, but, I think it's..s a part of me now. IT'S MAKING ME INTO THI..S THING!"

"Clyde, I--your hands!" I had just saw out of the corner of my eye Clyde's wrists, which had been yanking against the metal clamps, had begun to break free. And in the worst way possible. Let me put it this way: His wrists were already halfway through the steel and still going.

"My what?" He sniffed, oblivious to the medical emergency right in front of him. "Oh, my h..hands. I didn't notice."

"Oh right, because you can't--sorry, I just saw and started freaking out."

"That's okay. I'll try to s--suppress...ss outbursts like in the future. It's just....I'm not a zombie, where there are n--no morals or consciousness or anything really. But I'm not human, either. I'm a z..zombie with enough awareness....ss that I can feel guilt and p..pity and fear... Not dead, but not alive. Somewhere in the m..m...middle." He pulled down his arms, the wrists becoming unstuck with a sickening squish. I guess that's how, in horror movies, zombies can lose arms and not even notice.

"I wouldn't ever want--t to scare you, though. I can tell before all of t..this happened, before I got bitt--tten...You meant a lot to me, didn...n't you?"

.

..

"Yeah, but I shouldn't have meant anything. I was an awful person." I bit my lip, trying to hold back my own tears that threatened to spill over. "Am an awful person. And you don't deserve me. You finally realized that and I'm just waiting for you to remember how I mistreated y--"

"I beg t..to differ."

"You don't even know me anymore."

"I know you're a v...very nice girl who a--also cares....s about me. The first one I've met since w--waking up. All these jerkwa..wads, their 'care' is fake.... But--t not you, Ba...by. You're differen..t. I don't care who you were before because, honest--tly, that person is de...dead to me. Nothing m...more than som--some out-of-focus pictures..s. It's.s..ss who you decide to be now that matters..." My attempts to surpress my tears were futile, and I fell into Clyde's chair, craving one of his bear hugs. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him as close as I could. The warmth that I had always felt radiating from Clyde had vanished, it was replaced by a cold nothingness. But the boy who never hesitated to give me a second chance was still there, still making the same mistakes as before.

Except this time, I wouldn't fail him.