I'll See You When I Fall Asleep

Chapter 8

It had seemed only a moment had passed since Cammie had closed her eyes when the door to her bedroom burst open. She shot up out of bed to find Jess and Savannah standing in her doorway.

"How are you sleeping on your birthday?" Savannah demanded.

Before Cammie had a chance to reply, Savannah sprang into bed with her friends, wrapping her in a huge bear hug.

"Happy Birthday!"

Cammie froze for a moment, tensing at Savannah's touch. her Dream tumbling back into memory after burying it with sleep.

The Dream of a woman.

The moment passed quickly, however, as Cammie realized she felt nothing. Savannah's touch nor proximity arosed any type of feeling or urge within her. Surely this was an indication—a sign—that the Dream was wrong and she was not gay. Shouldn't being touched by a woman that Cammie cared about have evoked some type of response?

"Cammie?" Savannah asked when did not respond.

Cammie blinked. "Thank you."

"What's wrong?" Suddenly, Savannah was very concerned. She pushed herself away and searched her best friend's eyes, looking for something. Jess furrowed her brow as she came into the room.

Everything!

"What do you mean?"

"You seem a bit. . . Off."

I am!

"I'm not."

Savannah and Jess exchanged looks. They did not believe Cammie for a moment.

"What?" Cammie asked, irritated with both her sister and friend for sharing some secret between them. A sudden bud of anger bloomed in her chest at Savannah's attempt to pry open Cammie's secret.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes," Cammie snapped. She quickly realized her mistake, bit her lip, and tried to laugh off her sudden mood swings. "Of course I'm okay," Cammie said softer. "I didn't sleep enough last night. And you know how I am if I don't sleep."

Again, Jess and Savannah exchanged knowing looks. If Cammie did not get her eight hours of sleep, a brawl with a grizzly bear seemed like a better idea than being around Cammie. The two girls seemed to accept Cammie's answer, and though she always hated that she had such a short temper if she got less than eight hours of sleep, she was internally grateful that her temper had covered up her secret.

"Twenty-one and you still can't fall asleep when you're excited," Jess mused.

Cammie offered a weak smile at Jess' explanation.

"Well, get up! We're going to lunch." Savannah said.

Cammie glanced at her watch.

"We just ate breakfast," Cammie protested.

"We're not going to lunch to eat." Jess said.

"You can't even drink," Cammie retorted.

Jess rolled her eyes at her sister's naivety. "I've had a fake since I was nineteen."

Another secret her sister had kept. How many did Jess have? And were any of them as bad as Cammie's?

"What time is Adam going to pick you up?" Savannah asked.

"I think six."

"Perfect. We have a few hours before then."

Reluctantly, Cammie allowed herself to be pulled out of bed and dressed for the day.

Cammie's day was filled with drinking, eating, and forced laughter. Humoring Savannah and Jess for the few hours between breakfast and her date with Adam was its own type of trail. Thankfully, Savannah had kept Cammie's glass full all afternoon and she found it easier to move through the day with her head light from champagne. But before she knew it, the alcohol had faded away and Cammie found herself staring in the mirror, hands grasping the counter. She had to convince herself that she would get through this night. If she was able to spend the day with Savannah and Jess without them figuring out her secret, surely she could make it through the night and fool Adam.

Cammie finished applying her lipstick and headed down the stairs.

"You look nice," Jess said when Cammie passed her in the hallway. Compliments from Jess were few and far between, so she took this to heart.

"Thanks."

"Excited?"

"It's not different from any of our other dates."

Jess looked her up and down. "It sure looks different."

Had she dressed herself up to disguise the truth? She pushed the thought away.

"This is the first time Adam is seeing me as his future wife. I want to look nice."

Jess hummed.

Cammie made her way down the stairs to greet Adam at the door.

"You look so gorgeous Cammie!" Elizabeth gushed. She admired the curl Cammie had put into her hair. "You're such a beautiful young woman. You are going to make Adam a very happy man."

Cammie forced another smile, her heart racing at the anticipation of Adam. The knock at the door came and Cammie's heart started to beat double-time, threatening to leap out of her chest with each band against her ribs. She suddenly felt like she couldn't breathe: the moment was here.

Elizabeth pulled the door open to find Adam standing with flowers and broad grin on his face.

"You look stunning," Adam breathed.

Cammie's chest constricted; she couldn't do this. She couldn't lie to him. He stood there, none the wiser, believing that Cammie was his Soulmate. Wasn't she, though? She believed that she was, so why couldn't she be? It took everything with Cammie to keep her feet planted on the ground, to face Adam.

"Hi," Cammie said, finding her voice. She smiled back at this boy who meant the word to her. He was so handsome and he had done all of this just for her. How could they not be meant for one another?

Adam stepped in to the house, gave Cammie the flowers, and placed a quick kiss on her cheek.

"I'll put these in a vase for you, Cam." Elizabeth said, taking the flowers from Cammie. "You two hurry along, you don't want to be late."

Adam offered Cammie his arm and the two left.

"Happy birthday, Love," Adam said once they had gotten to his car. He pulled open the door, easing Cammie into the passenger seat. She felt comfortable back in the passenger seat of his car. She had been in this seat so many times throughout the years, she felt like she could almost forget that anything was amiss.

She looked at Adam ,studying his features. He was her Soulmate and she didn't care what any Dream told her. She leaned over and kissed him before he threw the car in drive. As Adam pulled away from the curb, he reach across the car and entertwined his fingers with Cammie's. This gave her a small bit of comfort. Perhaps she would make it through tonight afterall.


The night played out exactly as Cammie had predicted. They drove to the restaurant where Adam had many a reservation weeks in advance. On the drive over, they had listened to music. One they arrived at the restaurant, like a perfect gentleman, Adam parked the car and dashed around to the passenger's side, opening Cammie's door and helping her out. Hand-in-hand, they walked.

At dinner, Adam insisted Cammie order her first legal drink. Cammie hesitated at first, wondering if drinking would impede her ability to keep up the facade, to fool Adam and keep herself accountable. Adam, however, insisted the birthday girl order a drink, and the tension and stress Cammie was feeling over the Dream was too much to pass up a quick release. She needed to keep up the Great Illusion like a master magician, but she could not perform if she had stage fright.

So Cammie drank and the two continued to chatter throughout the meal, about nothing important, which Cammie once would have enjoyed. She hardly ever got to see Adam, except on vacations. She usually cherished these moments spent with him, the two talking about everything they wanted without fear of a phone dying or the other needing to sleep for an early class (which was always Cammie; Adam always sacrificed his sleep to spend a few more precious minutes with his girlfriend).

Now, Cammie felt the evening was rushing by in a hazy blur. She could not remember a single word Adam had said to her all night at dinner. She made a quick job of her first cocktail and Adam suggested she buy another, but a different flavor this time. By the end of dinner, she had consumed three drinks and felt like she could take on the world, shielded from her anxiety by the protection of the alcoholic disconnect.

"We've got one more thing to do tonight, but before we do, I wanted to talked to you," Adam said.

Cammie's stomach fluttered.

"Camille," he began, using her full name. Cammie's stomach sank. What was he doing? "The last four years I have spent with you have the been of my life. I felt that before I met you, I was walking through a fog, not really seeing anything."

Cammie thought back to her Dream, how nothing was clear until she saw. . . She didn't let herself finish the thought.

"You have made me the happiest man alive and I know that I want to spend every moment with you, the rest of my life. I want to grow old with you, have kids with you, explore the world with you. I never want our adventures to stop."

"Adam, what are you. . ."

He smiled. "Don't worry, I'm not proposing."

Cammie exhaled.

"I still remember your rule: no proposing until you finish law school. But," he said, reaching into his pocket. "I couldn't not give you something on this special day. It is your birthday, but it's also the first day of the rest of our lives." He pulled out a small velvet box that looked strikingly like a box for a small ring of the engagement sort.

He opened it to reveal a small silver necklace cushioned inside. The necklace was a simple silver chain with two small silver hears dangling. He lifted it out and placed it in Cammie's hand.

"If you look on the back of the hearts, one has the day we met and the other has today's date, the date where this all became real," Adam explained.

"You didn't have this made today, did you?"

Of all of the things she could have asked. She felt a bit stupid, but the alcohol was the to blame for tying her tongue.

He grinned, as if he had been waiting for this question. "Of course not. I had this made months ago."

Cammie's eyes widened. "Months?"

He nodded.

"How could you be sure that. . ." She let herself trail off. He knew what she meant.

"Weren't you sure?"

This gave Cammie paused. She had been too level-headed throughout this whole process, denying any chance that there was even a possibility that Adam wouldn't be her Soulmate. Now that is was the day, she was the last person who would have thought she would Dream of someone else, yet she was the person who betrayed Adam first. Eventually, Cammie nodded, not trusting her voice. It seemed like the effects of the alcohol were wearing off.

"I was sure, too." Adam said, gingerly plucking the necklace from Cammie's hand and hooking it around her neck.

"I love you Cammille Elizabeth Driver."

"I love you too," Cammie replied automatically.

Adam was so sure about everything. Adam was so sure about her. Hell, Adam didn't even need some stupid Dream to tell him that he would marry Cammie. He had this necklace made months in advance when there was still no guarantee that they would be Soulmates. But this confirmed it for Cammie. If Adam was sure, even without the Dream, then she could be sure, in spite of her Dream. Adam was her Soulmate and that's all that mattered to her. If Adam wanted to be with her, then she wanted to be with him, and it didn't matter what some Dream said.

She grasped his hands and looked deep into his eyes.

"I love you Adam."

He responded by giving her a kiss in return.

"Let's get you to the next stop."

Adam offered his hand and Cammie accepted, walking back to his car.

*

Adam drove Cammie to a club a few towns over. Before they were inside, Cammie could hear the bass blast music from within.

"A club?" Cammie asked.

"Savannah's idea. She's inside. I think Jess is here too and some other friends. I'm not entirely sure though."

This was a much bigger surprise than she had anticipated. She would be bombarded by people asking her about her Dream. The effects of her previous drinks seemed to be slipping away. Cammie was eager to get inside.

The club was full of bodies dancing drunkenly against one another with go-go dancers atop the tables. They quickly located Savannah and the rest of the group. Everyone cheered for Cammie, yelling "happy birthday" above the blare of the music.

Savannah pulled Cammie through the crowd and to the bar.

"What do you want?" Savannah asked.

Cammie didn't care what she drank as long as it got her through the night.

"Can I have an Adios?" Cammie called to the bartender.

The man nodded and began concocting a blue liquid drink. Savannah seemed impressed with Cammie's choice and ordered herself one. They went back to the dance floor, drinks in hand, and danced the night away. Cammie began to loosen up and found herself having a good time. Between the thumping of the music drowning out all sound and the drink dimming all of her senses, Cammie felt normal for the first time all day. She danced with Adam until he excused himself to grab another drink from the bar. Cammie turned to Savannah and pressed herself against her friend, moving to the hypnotic beats of music.

With more drinks than she could count in her system and the power of the Adios, she suddenly felt incredibly wreckless and defiant. She looked Savannah in her eyes and realized this would be the perfect opprotunity to really know if her Dream had any weight behind it. She hadn't felt anything for Savannah before, but she wanted to be absolutely sure.

Cammie leaned in to kiss her friend, hoping that everyone would chalk up the wreckless behavior to her drunken nature. The kiss lasted mere moments and Savannah laughed it off. Cammie realized that she hadn't felt anything and suddenly felt much more confident about her decision. Adam was sure about Cammie from the start and now Cammie was absolutely sure. It didn't matter what some dream told her: she knew that Adam was her Soulmate and nothing woudl change that.

Adam returned shortly after and Cammie threw herself back at him, confident that she had made the right decision for them both.

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