[40] i can't breathe

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yein

the past few days, a lot of happenings really made me feel divergent emotions. i was glad, excited, but at the same time afraid.

it feels different, really unusual for me. i have got to spend consecutive moments with him. we always meet in the hallway. always close to each other when eating at the cafeteria.

but of course, i should not put any hopeful meanings over it. let us not assume things.

it is wednesday and today is our flight again to the states for hyoin's quarterly checkup.

will jungkook ever notice my absence?

oh god, wake up, yein. there's no freaking way for him to notice you. though things happening recently are quite confusing, it is still not credible enough to conclude that it is what we think it is.

it is our second day here in the states. thankfully, yugyeom asked to meetup. we met at a cafe and just caught up with stuff.

"you still like jungkook?" he asked in disbelief.

"apparently, yes," i shrugged and started telling him things that had happened a few days ago.

"are you sure that that was jungkook? he seems like a different person for me," he muttered in puzzlement.

"i know, i think about that, too. there's a huge difference between his treatment before and today," i said and sipped on my drink.

"it looks like he is slowly.." and i looked at him intently, showing eagerness to hear what he is gonna say next.

"nothing. i don't want you to get your hopes high, i don't wanna see you suffer from a broken heart."

"okay, whatever." i rolled my eyes.

another day had passed and they left me alone again. i will be going back to school on monday. ahhh, i miss school.

really, yein? is really the school you miss, or this specific person there?

saturday came and all i could say is that i can't endure the boredom anymore.

i was about to take a nap when my phone suddenly vibrated. i checked it and it was message from hoshi on twitter.

soonyoung
@hoshikwon

FUCK YEIN

REPLY ASAP BTICH

OH FUCKING HELL

woah woah

calm yo tits bro

relax lmao

what is it

spill the tea

heyyyy wyn

bitch u hyped my curiosity

yooohoooo??? still there?

oh god

SHIT GOODNESS

PREPARE YOUR HEART

what is it again

you're frightening me

heyyy

is it going to hurt me or smth?

wait

fuck you

i'm nervous atm

i wanna cry

jungkook chatted me

aaaaaaaa what did he say

kh my gkd im starting to fry

cry

he asked me

what did he ask

he said

whaaaaaaat goddamn it hoshi spill it now

im fucking nervous

if its something painful im never going back to korea

ofc just kidding

but what did he ask

you know how much of an impatient person i am

i am not liking this thriller

"where is she?"

i can feel my heart tightened. it was suddenly hard for me to catch my breath.

i hastily grabbed my inhaler.

fuck, what hoshi just said was extremely shocking that it triggered my asthma.

i can't breathe.

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