JOSH DUN VS THE WORLD ✓

CHAPTER TWENTY: POTATO, TOMATO

Bet you forgot about this fic huh

"So, you want your friends, who I'm pretty sure hate me, to come and eat breakfast with us," Tyler says in a deadpan voice while the two of them get dressed, Josh wearing Tyler's clothes.

"It'll be great," Josh insists. "They're not as bad as you think. And they don't hate you."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure the murdery blonde chick and the drunk dude are going to kill me the moment they walk in."

"Okay, Hayley might, but Jon is harmless when he's drunk, which is all the time. Please? I really don't want them to be mad at me anymore. My heart can't take it anymore."

Tyler rolls his eyes but nods. "Fine. I'll make waffles, But you're in charge of everything else."

"What? Why everything else?" Josh pouts.

"Because waffles are harder to make and we took forever in the bathroom."

Josh grins and leans into Tyler, planting both hands on the sides of the bathroom sink. "We could always go for round two." He leans in for a kiss, and Tyler lets him get what he wants but only for a split second before ducking under his arm and walking to the kitchen.

"Tease!"

"You know it!"

They end up not making the waffles because Tyler ran out of milk and neither of them were about to go on a grocery run. So instead, Tyler makes omelets while Josh cooks bacon and burns the toast.

"Okay, how the hell do you screw up toast but not bacon?" Tyler laughs, watching Josh struggle to scrape the burnt pieces of what was once bread off the plate with a fork. "You just put it in the toaster."

"Screw you, Joseph," he snaps playfully.

"You wish you could, Dun."

Josh eventually gives up and tosses the plate and fork into the sink. "Okay, what else can we make that I can't theoretically burn?"

"Orange juice. I'll get the coffee so you don't screw that up too."

He checks in the kitchen cabinets until he finds the cups and pours six glasses, assuming a hungover Jon would be tagging along, as per usual. Tyler helps set up the coffee table and a fold up table he had stole from a fraternity house.

"You think they're going to like me?" He asks again while they push the table against his futon. "I don't think I gave a good impression at the Rock-It."

"Ty, my sweet sarcastic angel boyf. You told me it was the best choice to tell them about us instead of hiding it."

"Yeah, that was before my exes got involved."

"Well, technically only one ex so far. I've got, what, two more to defeat? Shouldn't be that hard."

Tyler rolls his eyes. "Friendly you reminder to your one brain cell that you died in a different timeline."

"Potato, tomato," Josh grins.

The doorbell rings, and they both look at each other, daring the other to answer. Tyler holds out his hands, so Josh has no choice but to Rock Paper Scissors to the death.

Josh loses and opens it, ready to greet the members of his band with snarky comments to make them feel at home. Whatever he planned on saying dies in his throat when he sees who's actually at the door.

"Hi, uhh Hayley invited me for breakfast?" Halsey says with a question in her voice.

Not knowing how to properly digest the fact that she's here, Josh just lets her in. He catches Tyler's reaction, who stares at Halsey for a moment, then looks back at Josh, bewildered. Josh shrugged, closing the door behind him.

"Hey," Tyler says, looking at Josh for help. "I'm Tyler. You're.. Ashley, right?"

Josh makes an x with his arms.

Halsey bristles, chuckling awkwardly. "Nobody calls me that, actually. I go by Halsey."

"Sorry, sorry, I knew that, it's just I have a sister your age and she told me about you."

"And... Joshie didn't?" She frowns this time.

Josh is jumping up and down behind her, trying to signal Tyler to stop talking.

Tyler doesn't understand and keeps going on a rant, trying to backtrack what he already said. "Oh, no, he did. He- he talks about you a lot actually. I heard you were a pretty cool... drummer. No- guitari- you know what, I think I left the coffee machine on."

He dips out to the kitchen, but both Halsey and Josh can still see him and the clearly off Keurig.

She looks back at Josh, who just smiles at her, praying that the others will show up to stop this torture. "How's it going, Joshie?"

"Great. I'm- I'm fantastic," he nods furiously.

"Is this the guy?" She points at Tyler, who plugs the Keurig back in and puts more coffee to make.

Josh tries to stay cool, and fails miserably. "Guy, what guy?"

"The guy."

He looks over at Tyler. The scar is visible from where he's standing at the door, from nearly halfway across the apartment. Something aches in his heart, and Josh smiles softly.

"Yeah, that's the guy."

Josh looks back just in time to see Halsey's pained expression, but she immediately switches to a forced grin. He knows he should feel guilty, which he does, but it fades as soon as Tyler turns.

"I don't want to put you to work when you just got here, but do you mind helping me set up?" He asks.

Halsey nods. "Of course."

While Josh rummaged through every drawer and cabinet for plastic forks and paper plates, Halsey puts the coffee and orange on the table while Tyler sets up chairs, which basically consists of three foldable chairs and the futon.

"Do you think seven people will fit here?" Josh asks as he helps serve the breakfast on the paper plates.

Tyler takes two and hands them to Halsey before grabbing another two for him to carry. "Let's hope so, or else this is going to be really awkward."

The next time to doorbell rings, Tyler answers it. As soon as it's open, Josh is bombarded with Hayley and Jon in the middle of a shouting match.

"You scramble them is what you do!" Hayley yells, hanging off Max's arms.

Jon points a finger in her face. "Then it wouldn't be an omelet."

Young Ryan waddles in after Jon. He smiles sheepishly and gives Josh a wave, and Josh waves back.

"That doesn't matter! It's either scrambled eggs or a burnt tortilla of chicken fetus." Jon throws his hands in the air and almost falls on his ass.

"How much did they have to drink between when Hayls called me to now?" Josh asks, keeping Jon steady.

"I lost count after the tenth shot," Max grumbles, letting go of Hayley. "I have no idea how these idiots are still alive."

She collapsed into one of the foldable chairs, already reaching for a coffee. "Because, we are on this god fucked earth to mess with lover bi here." Hayley sends Josh a wonky grin. "You mother fucker."

Josh claps his hands together. "Okay. Who's ready for breakfast?"