What A Drag... || Shikamaru x reader

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Edited: 02/06/24

Reuploaded: 06/06/24

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Shikamaru's PoV

I reached y/n's house and found myself just standing in front of her door for ages just listening for anything. But nothing.

No moving. No talking. Deadly silent.

I knocked on the door and it just slid open.

She didn't lock the door? How irresponsible...

Stepping in I noticed it was dark. Is she even home? I turned the lights on to see the place was empty, well almost, there was a figure slumped against the wall with a towel on their head.

"Y/n?" I called out. The figure didn't move.

"Are you still alive?" I asked, walking towards her but gradually getting faster until I was stood in front of her. I lifted the towel to see the familiar h/l h/c hair but the eyes that looked up were not ones I recognised. Her left eye had a strange red ring around her pupil and her right eye had her snowflake still in.

"Well, at least you're still alive," she replied coldly before standing up and walking to the kitchen.

So cold...

"Why're you being so cold?" I asked her, she didn't answer she just grabbed an apple and walked past me. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her back.

"Talk to me—!"

"No!"

I frowned and let go.

"Sorry, Shika. Not now," she muttered and continued walking away. I know I'm the one who's caused this but its making me angry.

"Fine, I'll come tomorrow. Speak with me then," I responded before turning and leaving her house. I'm going home. She's clearly angry. I didn't get out the house before I heard something break.

I quickly turned to see, y/n staring at a photo frame that'd fallen off the wall.

"How did you..." she muttered, trailing off as she picked it up and placed it on the table. I walked back and started to help her pick up the glass.

We were in silence for ages.

"You're an idiot you know," she whispered as she picked up the last of the glass shards and took the ones in my hand and stood back up before throwing them into the bin, "I said I'd help you, I'd be there and... fuck—"

I looked at the photo that had fallen, it was her and myself when we were 10 with her Dad watching us angrily—no, protectively in the distance.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, turning to see her with her hands on the counter, back to me but her shoulders were shaking. Silently crying.

I walked up behind her and hugged her from behind. It hurt to see she was like this but deep down I was happy because it showed that she really did care about me, and she cared a lot.

I was about to say something when she shook me off and turned around before weakly hitting my chest over and over while telling me I was stupid, dumb, an idiot, that I shouldn't have gone after Hidan and Kakuzu, that I shouldn't have let my grief and anger to take over me...

"... you shouldn't have left me behind," she finally whispered, not moving her clenched fists from my shirt before she dropped her arms and turned to walk away.

A new wave of anger washed through me, and I grabbed her wrist before pulling her back around and hugging her tightly.

"You're right," I told her, pressing my head into the crook of her neck as I spoke, "I was wrong to leave you behind. But I came back alive. You don't need to be scared that you'd lose me anymore. I'm here. Alive."

She didn't say anything so I just continued, "I'm furious that I made you cry but I just couldn't take you with me—when Hidan got your blood... I just couldn't stop imagining it on our way back. The way Asuma died, you've could've also... I could've also lost you the same way—I couldn't risk losing you too. I'd not be able to live with myself if the reason you died was because I took you with me on my selfish quest for revenge."

"I love you far too much to lose you like that," I muttered as I tightened my hold on her slightly and frowned at her silence, "I just... couldn't see that death again no matter what I was faced with."

I felt her stiffen for a moment before she let out a small sigh, relaxed, and then hugged me back.

Her embrace was tight, like the moment she let me go even slightly, then I'd disappear.

I felt like her holding me suddenly grounded me again and let out a small breath as I melted into her arms.

"Don't do it again," she whispered to me, "next time take me with you, no matter what."

"But—"

"Just do it, Shika," she said as I felt her hand rest on the back of my head as she let out another sigh, "I don't want to end up like Kurenai. As selfish as it is... I don't think I'd be able to survive it if I did."

Of course.

If you're selfish to think that then I'm just as selfish because I'd be the same.

I sighed and nodded before pulling her closer, I never want to let go.

This girl right here, she's the girl I want to love and protect forever, I never want to see her like this again.

It's such a drag that she's like this at all.