Chapter 35

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NEELAM's POV

I woke up hearing the raindrops hitting the windows violently as they were telling me that something bad was about to happening. I opened my eyes only to find Aryan's face a inch away from mine and I remembered that after the movie we slept hugging each other.

We are not this kind of couple and both of us is not a lovey dovey person, but I guess that there is always a first time. I think that also because we missed each other in these last days.

I started to caressing Aryan's hair when someone opened the main door and closed it harshly.
"Aryan, I can't find her" I heard Ahaan's voice and I quickly sat up and looked to the owner of the voice "What can't you find, Ahaan?" I asked him "I can't find Sukhi, I looked everywhere" when I heard her name I quickly stood up.

I was taken aback "If she's not at home she must be at work" I said to him while handing me a glass a water to calm him down but he refused "It's Sunday today, it's impossible that she is at work" he replied worried "Wait, don't panic Ahaan, she will be here, I will call her now, let me get my phone" I went in the kitchen to get my phone when I returned I sat down on the sofa where me and Aryan where sleeping last night.

I felt his arm again on my waist and I quickly push it away "Not right now, Aryan! Get up, we need to find Sukhi" I said and he woke up and asked what happened and Ahaan told him the facts clearly.
After several unanswered calls and messages from Sukhi we decided to check in our apartment again. Maybe she went out for a walk or something and now she is back again.

AHAAN'S POV

I woke up alone and I felt upset because she knows it that I can't sleep without her, how could she leave me without waiting for me to wake up?
I rubbed my eyes and started to look for the girl I loved when I couldn't find her I started to worry. Did something happened to her? Hundreds of scenes played in my mind and I shook all of them away. The time was running so fast and I still couldn't find her, again I was hearing the same strange feeling that something bad is going to happen and Sukhi is not fine.
Every second without her I could feel my heart ache more and more and I didn't wanted to lose her, even the feeling of her going away from me was breaking my heart in small pieces like broken pieces of mirror cutting my skin. We were finally arrived at her apartment and I started to call her name again and again with the hope that she will answer it with her sweet and calm voice. I always say that her voice is annoying in the morning but today I wanted to hear it so badly telling me "What idiot? Why are you making a scene for no reason?" I really wanted to hear this. "Sukhi, where the hell are you? Why are you doing this to me? It's not funny if it is a joke" I screamed while tears were flowing down my cheeks.
I can't live without her, I can't breathe without her.

When I went in the kitchen I saw Neelam holding a piece of paper in her hand "Neelam, please help me to find her! What are you doing with this piece of paper?" I asked to to her but she didn't moved or answered. Out of frustration I took the paper from her hands and started to read.

"Dear Ahaan,
By the time you will be reading this letter it will be too late.
I know you are looking for me right now but I am far away from you. I am really sorry for not keeping my promise but I guess this was our fate. I took this decision very carefully. The reason why I left you was because I want you to be with your family and I don't want you to choose me over your own blood. I know I can be selfish but I did it for you. I am leaving you not because I don't trust you but because I love you and for you I am ready to sacrifice everything as long as you are happy.
Forgive me please.
Thanks to you I got the chance to be liked as a best friend, loved as a girlfriend, loyal as a fiancée and most importantly I got the chance to be the mother of our beautiful child, please take care of yourself, that's the only thing I am asking you, Ahaan.
Don't blame yourself, It's not your fault but the fault is the circumstances we are in. Maybe leaving you was one of my biggest mistake but for your happiness I am ready to do so, and live a life feeling guilty for doing this to you and us.
Don't try to look for me but just become the person you wanted to become since the beginning, that's what I want. This is your dream and nothing will make me happier other than seeing you achieving it.
Take care of Neelam and Aryan too. I am sorry for giving you guys so much pain but please understand me.
I love you Ahaan.
Your Sukhi."

I kneeled down and started to cry, yeah I am weak. I am nothing without her. Every word that I read made me hate myself more, how can I be the person to even love her when I didn't even know what she was going through, I hate even the idea of me being the reason why she left.
She can't do this to me, she promised me that she will never leave me again and now she can't do this to me, who the f*ck gave her the permission to leave me? I wanted to rip off the piece of paper that I was holding but I couldn't that was the only thing she gave me.
Till that day I woke up and hope all of this was a nightmare but the letter laying beside me tells me the opposite, the fact that she is gone.
I hate her for leaving me. She could have talked about it with me. I hate her for not trusting me, I could have talked with my parents and I could have left them over her.

I might have stopped looking for her but every beat of my heart still looked for her without my permission and deeply inside I know that I need her more than I need anyone else.

I am not going to forgive her.
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SORRY GUYS FOR THE LATE UPDATE..Hope you like this chapter.
See you with the next one soon.
From now on I will try to be focus on Suddenly more.
Love you.

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