Angels With Filthy Souls R-18 (COMPLETED)

#19

Nagising ako na nanakit ang buong katawan lalong-lalo na ang pagitan ng aking hita. Oo nga at masarap pero sa aking husga at mas masakit pa rin. Late na ako pero hinayaan ko muna ang sarili kong mahiga pa ng ilang saglit. 

Habang nagpapahinga ay ianbot ko ang aking phone at agad akong napangiti sa mensaheng natanggap mula kay Forsythe. Although it's just a morning greeting with a smiley, it still considers to complete my day. That simple text tugs something on my insides making me feel giddy and excited all at once. I immediately jump out of bed and that only made me wince to the pain that gripping the edge of my table is all that I can do to transfer the pain. 

Pa-ika-ika akong napalakad papunta sa bathroom. Somehow the hot shower I take helped in lessening the pain. When I got out of the shower, I am already 15 minutes late. I can hear the knocks on my door as Mom's warning are as well audible. Minadali ko ang pagbihis ng intership uniform ko at hinarap na si Mommy habang nagsusuklay pa. 

"You are late, Lana. Good gracious, baka gagan'yan ka pa rin kapag nasa totoong trabaho ka na. Come on down and grab your breakfast." I only sigh and nod my head with defeat. 

I go for two stairs at a time as Mom continues with her early morning preach. I sit on my usual spot - the counter stool - as she serves me my cereals with milk and my banana. I don't drink coffee because that will cause me death, it makes my heart beats fast. 

"You don't have any reasons to be late, Lana Bellamie." Umangat ang tingin ko kay Daddy na nakaupo rin kung saan siya laging nakapuwesto, sa dulong upuan ng dining table. I opt not to throw a rebut because that's surely pointless. 

"Hindi ka pa naman masusundo ng Ninong mo." Marahas na napalingon ang mga mata ko kay Mommy dahil sa sinabi niya. 

"Bakit daw po, Mom?" Pasimple kong tanong pero sa loob-loob ng puso at isip ko at marami ng mga katanungan at pag-aalala. Did I hurt his too? Napagod ko rin ba siya? Siguro, oo dahil siya 'yung maraming ginawa sa amin kahapon. I only sat there and moan for his beautiful name. 

"He went back to Canada last night."

"What!?" My voice seems to raise as their confuse stares rest on me. "I mean why? Is there an emergency? Is he okay, Mom?" I interject. 

Narinig ko ang pagsara ni Dad ng newspaper na hawak niya at tumikhim pero nanatili pa rin ang atensyon ko sa kay Mommy na naglalagay ng carrots sa lunch box ko. 

"That does not concern you anymore." I nod despite of the disappointment I feel inside. Is this the problem he forgot to tell me yesterday? Was that that urgent that he left me without even saying goodbye? Or what happened between us yesterday was his way of saying goodbye?

Nawalan na ako ng gana  pero pinilit kong ubusin ang breakfast ko at bumalik sa taas para kunin ang mga gamit ko. Sinigurado ko munang nakatagong mabuti ang cellphone na binigay sa akin ni Forsythe bago bumaba papunta sa garage. 

While we are on the road, I try to look on the positive side. Like thinking that maybe he's still in the pub house. Baka makakuha ako ng sagot mula sa publishing house or whatsoever. Nangangati na ang kamay kong kontakin siya dahil nawalan na ako ng oras kanina sa bahay. Baka sa pub house ko na 'yon magawa at totoo ngang lalong nagwawala 'pag pinipigilan. 

"Hoy! Bakit ngayon ka lang? 'Di mo tuloy naabutan ang pasabog ng Kuya Caleb mo at sa totoo lang mas okay siya kaysa ru'n kay kuya mo EA. Ang galing niyang makisabay kaso nga lang taken na." 'Yan ang pambungad sa akin ni Ava pero hindi ko naintindihan ang iba nia pang sinabi dahil nabingi na ako pagkatapos marinig ang pangalan ni Kuya Caleb. 

"Kuya Caleb?" pag-ulit ko pa, "Ano naman ang ginagawa niya rito?" 

Ava dodges my shoulder. "Bakit ba late mo masyado sa balita, eh ikaw ang mas close sa mga gwapong lalakeng iyon." Huh, I wish too but that's not what we should be talking about. 

Pinakatitigan ko siyang mabuti na nangunguhulugang naghihintay pa ako sa totoong sgot niya. She sighs and says, "Umuwi raw si sir Forsythe para sa isang family problem." 

"Excuse me, Ava." Marahan ko siyang hinawi sa dinadaanan ko para umakyat sa executive office. 

My heart sinks more when I saw Kuya Caleb and not Forsythe. Our eyes met and I saw the same  reaction as to what I witnessed earlier from Mom and Dad, confusion. Unlike with Kuya EA, the vibe with Kuya Caleb is much more chill. I don't know, maybe it's because of our age gap. It's much closer compare to the former. 

"Lana," Kuya calls out my name. 

"Where is Ninong?" I try to calm my voice but it only sounded more eager. 

"He went back to Canada." Kahit na walang emosyon ang aking mukha ay ramdam ko ang kirot sa puso ko. 

"Bakit daw po, Kuya?" Tanong ko ulit habang naglalakad palapit sa upuan na nasa harap ng desk. Memories from yesterday flood my brain. 

Kumunot ang noo ni Kuya Caleb, "I guess that it's not your concern anymore, Lana." I heave a sigh and slowly let it go. If you only knew, we both concern each other. I care for him and he cares for me more than you guys care for me. 

"Babalik pa po ba siya?" I flash him a cheerful smile hoping that that confusion will be erased. 

He shrugs as the other end of his lips goes upward. He looks unsure and that bothers me more. "Maybe... maybe not." 

Nagpaalam na  ako kay Kuya at lumabas sa opisina niya. Nagsisimula pa lang kami pero bakit agad niyang tinuldukan? Dumiretso ako sa comfort room at ni-lock ang main door para walang makapasok. Agad kong kinuha ang phone ko at tinawagan siya sa Messenger application. 

Nakakatatlong ring muna bago niya iyon sinagot. 

"Kitten," boses pa lang niya ay bumigay na ang luhang kanina ko pa pinipigilan. 

"You're unfair." 

"I know and I am sorry for that, 'kay? I am really sorry, my Kitten." His pleads and I stifle a whimper. Thinking that he is already away creates a missing and longing feeling in my heart. 

"Daddy," I cry out his name. 

"Hush now, Kitten. I promise that I'll be backed. I am just going to fix what's happening here, okay?" I nod although he cannot see me. I want his hug right now. 

"Hindi ka man lang nagpaalam sa akin. You left without a warning, I miss you already." I sound clingy but that does not bother me anymore. I want him to know how messy it is for me leaving me behind without a warning and for spoiling me with his attention too much. 

"I know and I am so sorry. I need to go now, Kitten. Call you later." 

Marami pa akong gustong sabihin sakaniya pero tuluyan na ngang naputol ang linya ng tawag. Kahit papaano ay nabunutan ako ng tinik na malaman na okay siya. But I need more details. I need to be filled more. I don't want to feel any regrets and I don't want too expect a hindsight to happen. Gusto ko pareho lang ang hati naming dalawa. 

Sa ginawa sa akin ni Forsythe ay masasabi kong parang wala siyang pinagkaiba sa mga magulang ko. He is also a controlling human being. They only differ on how they do it. My parents uses their authority above me while he takes advanatage of what I feel for him. They all are unfair. 

"Are you coming for the victory party tomorrow evening?" Nag-isip muna ako sa alok ni Ava. 

Parang gusto kong magrebelde. Gusto kong pakawalan ang sarili ko. Life has been unfair lately and I am one of his favorite victim. 

After thinking thoroughly, I smile at her - a genuine one - while nodding my head. 

"Count me in." Napatili siya pero mahina lang. "But you know the drill, fetch me at one." She gives a thumbs-up from her both thumb finger.