Baby Blu Assassin// COMPLETED✔️

I - Bad Decisions

I woke up feeling normal. I didn't know how to feel with how much was going on actually. I was telling myself to cry, to mourn, to do something, to feel something. But nonetheless, I couldn't. I felt, relief?

With all that I've felt in the past this one is new. I actually felt okay. Now the old me is gone, now I start with the new.

I woke up in the middle of the night to hear mumbling. No, not mumbling, some one was talking to me. Or at least trying to.

"Okay beh, I'm leaving now." Was all I could make out the first five seconds of waking up.

"mmmh" Was all I could respond.

"Alright c'mon now give me a hug"

I lazily dragged myself out of the covers to give my mother a hug. I fell back down into my bed, drifting off to another slumber before I heard, "There's extra money on your dresser and your grandpa is going to take me to the airport."

A suitcase rolling away before my dreams consumed me was heard in the distance.

Memories of earlier this morning flashed through my mind as I welcomed the morning sun into my bedroom through the windows. I dragged myself out of bed to go make breakfast. I hadn't had much planned today than for my cousins to teach my how to live around here, since I'm a "foreigner" and all.

The thing is, I'm pure Filipina, but I can't speak the language and I've never actually lived around here before. I just thank whatever God's that are listening that most of the population of Filipinos can speak English.

My mind was swirling with thoughts of what I would had to do today and how I needed to improve. That's after all the only reason why I was stuck here in the first place.

After breakfast I slowly got ready to meet with my cousins at 11, and seeing that it's only 8:00 I have a lot more time on my hands than needed.

My grandpa came out of his room and went straight for the front porch. We didn't talk much because of our language barrier but also because I think that man straight up just doesn't like me. Plus this is like my first time ever seeing him so there's a lot of discomfort in this house.

I got my clothes and hygiene supplies from my suitcase seeing that I still needed time to transfer them to my dresser. I set my things on my twin sized bed that's pushed up against the wall with the window behind the headboard. I examined them to check if I were missing anything and to my surprise I hadn't forgotten anything, seeing as though I can almost remember almost everything about everybody but things for myself.

I head to the shower with my things in hand and set them down on the counter. I take a minute or two to take everything in about my current situation. After about five minutes I undress myself of my PJ shorts and my loose green tank top.

Now I'm not the skinniest person out there but I have meat on my bones. My figure is curvy and I have to thank the female genes that runs in the family for that. I jump in and turn on the shower but immediately regret it. The water is cold and I gasp at the memory of what my mother told me...

"Ok beh there's no cold water here so you're just going to have to live with it for awhile."

I mentally curse the water system in this country and continue to wash myself. Memories of my old home come flooding my mind as I close my eyes to wash my face. Thirty seconds with my eyes closed and already my mind ached of the memories.

10 seconds...

"Are you fucking serious ma? You're just gonna let her do shit like this?"

15 seconds....

" It none of your business, who are you to tell me what to do? "

23 seconds...

"You're gonna get us all killed Blu, I hope you fucking know that."

30 seconds...

I quickly rinse my face with the cold water which also brought me back to reality as soon as it hit my face. I gasped for air, putting my hand on my my chest as I felt it sink down and rise back up in a fast rhythm. I needed to control my breathing so I held my breath in for 7 seconds, and slowly released it in 8 seconds. I stayed there with the cold water hitting my skin for a minute trying to take control of my lungs. I quickly finished the rest of my shower and dressed myself.

Before I left the bathroom I looked at myself in the mirror. I watched as my damp, dark brown hair went all the way down to the middle of my stomach with droplets of water dripping from the ends. I looked at my dark brown eyes through my lashes and let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

I saw determination in this girl's eyes, I saw a goal that she wanted to achieve. And it would take a lot to achieve it but deep into those dark honey filled pools of eyes, I saw a challenge.

And I always win a challenge...