signed fate

< 19 >

Lisa was like every other girl out there.

Bound to meet people, bound to build relationships, bound to fall in love...

Bound to get her heart broken.

She knew her pain wasn't different from the pain, that other girls felt when they experienced Break ups. She also knew that Hanbin shouldn't have this much power over her heart, Lisa basically gave up falling in love ever again.

At least she thought so, but Kim Hanbin had the great ability to make her fall in love with him all over again, just by looking into her eyes.

And deep down - behind all the pain she felt because of him and all the anger he set free in her - Lisa knew that her heart would always forgive him. Why? Because her mind and her heart never seemed to think the same way.
While one was all in for hating him, the other part couldn't even connect his name with hatred.

Now that he was standing just a few metres away from her, Lisa felt her inside go crazy for him all over again. She yearned for him.

"How come your mouth and your eyes rarely agree with each other, Lisa?", he asked her genuinely and looked at her, awaiting an answer.

She looked at him, eyes full of concerns, and asked herself, what was so hard about appearing stronger in front of him. Lisa wanted to look bigger, like she grew not only by height but also by mind. However, Hanbin always looked through her, as if it was the easiest to do.

It made her angry.

"How come your promises and actions never agree with each other?", she asked him instead of answering his question, if he had the right to ask her such questions then she would give herself the same right as well. Lisa was so tired of being the one hurt, she wanted to show him that she could manage without him - that he was irrelevant to her. Even though it wasn't true. "What do you want, Hanbin-ssi?"

The way she called his name was so new to both of them, Hanbin had to take a deep breath in order to collect the new piece of information.

She was not going to talk in peace with him, he knew just by seeing her big, stormy eyes.

Eyes that once watched him with admiration and pure love.

"I want us to settle things", he answered her and made her go furious.

Lisas mind was comparable with a time bomb, there wasn't much left until she would once and for all explode.

As much as she would like to take it all out on Hanbin, for he was the one guilty, she couldn't allow herself to do that. He still had a special place in her heart and as long as that place existed, Lisa wouldn't be able to throw hate at him.

They had known each other for so long - long enough for Lisa to know that this boy didn't deserve to be hated on.

But then again, he said thing that made her go insane. Both, in a positive and in a negative way.

"Settle things?", Lisa let out a sarcastic laugh, as dry as dust. Her shimmery eyes turned into ice, he wasn't sure whether anyone in the world could melt that icy gaze. "I believe there is nothing to settle between the two of us"

It was true that he won her heart back then, but things change within time and Lisa knew that for a fact.

The moment he decided to drop her out of his life, she promised herself to never return into Kim Hanbins arms - she would never find a home in his embraces ever again.

Lisa wasn't going to fall for these tired pair of brown eyes for a second time. There wasn't enough pain capacity inside her.

The girl was so deep in her thoughts, she didn't notice him taking steps towards her. There were only two steps in between them.

Only two steps for them to reach each other, one step each.

"Please don't turn your back on me", he pleaded with his voice that started off strong, but got weaker towards the end.

"I never turned my back on you, Hanbin-ssi, it's you who did it", in contrary to Hanbins tone, hers was practically cold as ice. Deep inside, things didn't look good either. Lisa wasn't sure how long she could resist holding back her feelings for him.

"Lisa" Lisa.

She hated how her name sounded so much more beautiful, when he called her name. It sounded like a love song from his mouth and it made her heart pump crazily.

"Don't search for me, don't call my name and let our bound be in the past for heavens sake!", she shouted at him and could be considered lucky for the fact that there weren't any people outside, where both of them were.

"How can you say those things without hearing me out for once, Lisa? Why won't you give me the chance to talk?", Hanbin exclaimed in despair and ran a hand through his hair, as he reached for Lisas hand and held it like it was his property. "Please hear me out"

Three. Two. One.

Explosion.

Lisa saw red everywhere.

"You dare to ask, why I refuse to hear you out? Kim Hanbin, let me remind you of the day, that you didn't listen to me and abandoned my heart!", she spoke shakingly through gritted teeth and ripped her hand out of his hold. Her eyes widened more and more. "You ask me, how I'm able to say those thing, when you wronged me so much more... gosh you did such a terrible thing"

And then she saw pity in his eyes. Pity that made tears build up in her eyes out of anger.

Lisa started crying in her state of anger.

"You gave me so much hope that we would overcome everything together, that it was us against the world... but it turns out it was me against the world from the very beginning on!", she began to shout at him and took a few steps back to throw her arms in the air, out of despair. "I'm so damn tired of our past, it drains me every day"

She buried her hand in her hair and bit her lip harshly.

"What is this that you are trying to achieve? You wanted space and I gave you that, what else do you want from me?! You already left me empty handed!"

Hanbin chose to look at ground instead, a gesticulating that gave Lisa the sign of him regretting his words. He understood her point of view.

Lisa assumed he would finally give his blessing to let go of everything that happened in the past, but the the thing he did next pointed out the contrary.

He took a step forward, placed his hand on her head and stroked her hair affectionately.

"Please refrain from growing tired of me, I have so much space inside my heart that needs to be filled with you"