BL One Shots & Imagines

Behind the Scenes

Warning: mentioning of eating disorder and anxiety disorder

Disclaimer: this is pure fiction, none of the following scenarios happened in real life this is only me being a depressed and slightly self deprecating bish...

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In front of the cameras and their fans, Mean and Plan are seen as a fierce and loveable couple ,but what happens when the cameras turn off and the fans are nowhere to be seen...

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It's a late night and we just finished another fan meeting connected to our series, Love by Chance. As usual when the cameras turn off and we're not near the fans Mean turns awfully cold to me. Sometimes it makes me wonder what I've done wrong.

"Are you guys also coming back to the hotel or are you guys going out to eat or something first? P'Mean? P'Plan?"

I turn and look at Perth, shrug my shoulders and say,

"I don't know... I'm kind of tired, maybe I'll just head back I'm not that hungry anyway..."

"But... P' you haven't eaten all day are you okay?"

I want to scream no I'm not because my heart is in a lot of pain and the one person I want to notice that, has turned cold towards me. "Eeeh yeah I'm fine..."

I say goodbye to the guys and drive my car back to the hotel, I'm so damn happy I brought my own car to the fan meeting today, because it gave me a quick escape.

I got back to the hotel about 30 minutes later and locked myself in the bathroom as fast as I got there. Yeah I hadn't eaten all day because every time I tried to eat it didn't go more than 10 or 15 minutes before it all came up again. Yeah you guessed it, about a month ago I was diagnosed with bulimia and combined with my anxiety this wasn't the best thing in the world...

I didn't have much strength left in my body, and since I was alone I didn't have to cover it up. I tried eating a muffin on my way back here just so I had enough concentration to get back to the hotel. But I barely managed to get in the door to the bathroom before I was puking my guts out.

I didn't notice that Mean also had got back before I felt the presence of someone behind me. He had probably heard me throwing up. He came over to me and started stroking my back.

I really didn't want him to see me like this. He'd probably think I'm weak, with tears running down my face and vomit all over.

"P'... H-how long have this been going on. Is this why you never want to eat with the rest of us? Is it because of this...you always look tired and never have as much energy as before?"

"I'm sorry...Mean don't tell the others please... I don't want them to know."

"Don't worry... I won't."

"...Thank you"

Mean helped me with getting a fresh towel and a change of clothes, then he left me in the bathroom alone so I could shower and change.

When I had changed I went over to my bed, or rather the twin beds that had been pushed together as one and laid down on it.

"P' I'm sorry... for the way I've been treating you... I guess I did it because I was scared, but I'm not scared anymore... P' I think I like you..."

"I like you too... idiot, but I don't think I can do this...it would be just too much of a pressure because of our fans and the media."

"P' I don't care... because this is a matter that only is between you and I"

"

But Mean what if..."

"There's no buts or what ifs, because there's only us... so P' do you want to be my boyfriend?"

"Yes..."

He smiled and hugged me close...

"Now P' let me help you get better okay, I don't want you to hurt like this anymore"

"Thank you...Oh and Mean... I have a question."

"Okay P' what is it?"

"Can I kiss you?"

"Yeah...you can" he smiled that adorable kind smile of his and I got closer to him.

I pressed my lips gently towards his and I could feel a smile on his lips as I did. I smiled as well and then pulled away.

Thank you God and Buddha, for letting us meet and fall in love with each other.

I hugged Mean again and laid back down on the bed, I pulled Mean down with me and then put my head on his shoulder before falling asleep.

The next morning when the managers called for us Mean asked if it was okay for us to not go, I was still a bit tired and exhausted from not eating enough and not feeling in a shape of attending the fan meeting. He also asked I'd it was okay for him to skip the fan meeting to take care of me but I told him to go and rather come back earlier to be with me.

Who knew, that the cold guy I fell in love with, already when we filmed Make it Right those years ago, that he would also fall in love with me... I'm happy, but this all felt too good to be true.. and maybe it was... but I don't care as long as I have him.

He's mine and I'm his...

Were #2Wish... I laught and take out my phone...

I log into Twitter and see a tweet from Mean... I click on it and see that it's a picture of us with the caption

"ดูแลตัวเองด้วยนะ 💙💚 #2wish"
(the caption is 'Take care of yourself 💙💚 #2wish')

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Thanks for reading another one of my stories and again if you have any requests please send me a message or comment on this chapter

Take care and I'll see you tomorrow (or later tonight)with a new part.

💙💚🥰