Together

On To Find My Future

Hey kiddos! I haven't seen you all for a few days- I've been traveling a bit, but I finally made it home today. Here's a cheeky little update for you all... some serious foreshadowing in this one. That's all. No I won't tell you where it is- that's your job ;) Enjoy/comment/vote xxx
-ab

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November 21, 2026

Patrick

Harper's days with Anastasia are beginning to grow limited. I know that, right now, she's onstage, finishing up her final performance of the week. After that show ends, she will only have eight more shows left as Anya.

We haven't really talked about what she wants to do next, seriously. She has mentioned several times that she may want a break, but I can't pretend that I haven't seen the audition announcements that she has been viewing on her phone. She mentioned once wanting to start trying for a child, but I don't know if that was only because she had just been with Taylor and Audrie. She hasn't mentioned that since.

I don't know what she really wants to do, but I do know that I want her to be happy in whatever it is that she decides. While I would love to become a parent with her by my side, I would never want to force her into that. Especially not when both of us are still so young. If she wants to take on another show, that would be entirely understandable. If I understand correctly, she's becoming a bit of a fan favourite. I've seen many Instagram posts pop up within the past few years, with captions indicating that whoever runs the account thinks that Harper is adorable, amazing, sweet, or any other positive adjective. Of course, I completely agree with all of those words which are written about her. It just feels strange, sometimes, to be sharing my wife with the rest of the world.

Even if she does intend on taking a break, in all honesty, I believe that she wouldn't be able to turn down a job if one were to come her way. It's been said that you never truly leave Les Miserables, you just take a break. Going back to that show would be Harper's dream, I believe.

I can't believe that we are already here, thinking about what she will do after Anastasia is closed. It feels like just yesterday that we were discussing what she should do after Les Mis. She was so worried that she would never get another job. I can't help but wonder if those fears exist this time around, as well. She's incredibly talented, and I know that she will find another job whenever she wishes to get another job, but I also know that she would never believe anyone who tells her that. Her own voice in her head is much louder than any voice coming from the outside.

It isn't too long before the door to the house opens and Harper walks in. I can tell that she's upset from the moment she steps foot inside.

"What's wrong, lovie?" I ask her, pulling her right into my arms.

"I'm going to miss it," she sighs. Thankfully, she's not crying, but I'm worried that may begin soon.

"Anastasia?" I ask her.

"Yeah. I only have eight shows left. One week from this very moment, I'll be at the closing party. The closing party for my show. That hurts."

"Hey, love, you know this. That's what happens. Shows close, and there's nothing that you can do about it."

"I know, but-"

"Hey, they're using that theatre for The Prom, right?"

"Well, yeah, but-"

"Don't you like that show?"

"I mean, I do..."

"So, let's get some tickets."

"That's not my point," she groans.

"Well, what is your point?" I ask. I truly don't know how to help her right now. Of course, she was upset during Les Mis, but it was a different type of sadness, as the show as a whole wasn't closing. She knew that she could go back and visit whenever she fancied.

"My point is that I don't want it to be over. I just love playing Anya, and it's going to be so weird to not go to the theatre every day. I won't be taking the tube with Kath anymore, and I won't be on that stage every night. Who knows when I'll be back up there. What if I'm never back up there?"

"Can we talk about what you're doing after this show?" I ask her, suddenly. It's a good time to bring it up.

"Haven't we, already?" she asks. "I'm going to take a break and perhaps have a baby."

"Do you really think you're ready?"

"Of course I'm ready. Patrick, we have talked about this before," she sighs with impatience.

"I want to make sure that you really, truly mean it."

"I really do," she promises. "But I hope that I can sing in some cabaret shows, perhaps, or something. I am still going to need to find a way to keep myself in shape, vocally, for whenever I want to return to performing. Even if it is ten years from now."

"I'd hope it isn't that long," I tell her. "I don't think any of us would be able to keep you away from what you love so much for that long."

"True," she giggles. "One kid, then give it a few years, and I'll do another show or two before kid two."

"That's a deal," I wink. "Though you'll be quite a bit older by then. I think that if there are any dream roles you have that are young characters, you need to give it a try right now."

"I mean, there are so many roles that would be amazing, but there are no auditions for those shows right now. I wouldn't be able to play a queen in Six, as I don't have the right voice for that, and Pritti in Everybody's Talking About Jamie isn't a role for white girls, which is fine. There are plenty of other roles out there. I can't cartwheel for Miss Honey in Matilda, I've already been rejected from Sophie in Mamma Mia once, and The Prom has already announced their cast. On top of that, it's always nice if the girls in that show are actually part of the LGBT community. The transfer of Natasha, Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812 that they've been talking about for nearly ten years is clearly never happening. That gets rid of basically my entire bucket list."

"Geez Harper," I laugh. "You've really thought this through."

"Yep," she laughs, then yawns.

"Well, all that I can tell you, I guess, is to just enjoy the time that you have left in Anastasia, and we'll go from there."

She giggles a bit at my very intentional reference to the show. "I guess that's a good plan."