The pain is nothing.
The pain is nothing,
The regret is nothing.
The regret is nothing,
"Compared to losing you."
_____
___Y/N'S POV
Red...
I heard your voice,
But I didn't see you...
Yeah, of course I didn't.
I was too busy dying.
My eyes fluttered open slowly and I saw the spinning ceiling fan that had been in my room for the longest. I placed a hand on my head gently and winced, quickly yanking my hand away as if my forehead had burned me.
My head was killing me and I hated it. I only really remembered hearing the sound of the elevators wires snap and the rest was all one big blur.
I sat up on my soft bed that I had missed up so much. I stretched and winced, my body cramping a bit but only in minor places. A very soft yawn left my lips and I closed my eyes, letting a soothing wave wash over me that brought me relief.
"That was cute."
I jumped and looked around frantically. I knew I wasn't hallucinating, but at this point, I really doubted myself at times.
Now's not the time to be thinking about him!
"Wh-Who's there?!" I called out and stepped onto the cool carpet of my bedroom floor. It made me shudder and my feet tingle from the chilling yet ticklish sensation. The panic was starting to boil from the pit of my stomach and I gulped nervously. On top of the possible situation I was in... There was no one here with me.
"It's me. You're not imagining it this time, Y/n."
I walked over to the foot of my bed briskly and my eyes widened. Red was laying on the floor, using the bed as a neck rest with his arms crossed. He wasn't wearing the red hoodie from before and instead had a red and white striped shirt on. I could just barely see an outline of his chest through the shirt and it made my cheeks heat up.
A small smile formed on my lips and I took a seat beside him. "Hey, how did you get here?" I asked softly and he shrugged, reaching into the pants of his joggers and pulling out a Pokéball.
The one that was in my room? Probably not though, because he was a Pokémon trainer from a fictional game that had little balls to capture little pocket monsters—
SHUT THE FUCK UP.
"Um..." Red raised an eyebrow at my wide eyed gaze and I giggled nervously, rubbing the back of my head. "O-Oh! Carry on...!"
"Well... It comes in handy, hm?" He smiled a bit before letting out a quiet sigh. "You gave me a scare, y'know? Both times I saw you."
"Both times? When was the second time? Or first for that matter..." I furrowed my brow and looked at him with a curious gaze.
"Ah, I'll tell you later. You just need to tell me something." He shook his head with his eyes closed. His usual cold demeanor was replaced with a more cooler one that made my heart skip a beat.
"O-Oh yeah! I-I'm sorry for placing the blame on—"
"No, not that. I don't care if you blame me for that. I'm used to it. All I want, is to know what that douchebag did to you." Red had cut me off and shot me a sideways glare. He seemed to be looking for something from me, but of course I couldn't figure out just what he wanted me to say.
I frowned and looked down, rubbing my arm as an uneasy feeling settled within me. I felt his warm touch as his fingers gently lifted my chin up. I willingly tilted my head back and shuddered when his fingers grazed my neck gingerly.
He's touching me...
So why do I feel so scared...?
"Why are there so many?" He muttered under his low breathing and and continued to examine my neck closely. He stopped when I gave a small whimper, his fingers moving further down my collarbone. The sensation was burning with a newfound sense of pleasure that I wasn't ready for, and I was sure he had noticed this too. He gave a subtle nod, his lips pressed into a thin line, one that lacked a smile.
You see them now?
All my sinful infidelities?
Yes, I hate them too...
"Y/n... How, no... Why did you let him do this?" His voice was soft and along with his burning question, my own tears stung the corners of my eyes. I sniffled and let out a quiet whimper. My hands were shaky as I rested them gently on his lap. Red cupped my cheeks and I leaned into his embrace, his warmth bringing me slight comfort from my uncomfortable mind.
"I-I don't know... As long as I g-give him what he wants... Then he won't l-leave me to rot..." I explained in an uneven tone, tears running down my cheeks in streaks.
A part of me was hurt by my own actions.
But another part was drowning in the sorrow and regret they had caused my in life.
"Th-Then I got a boyfriend, even though he never st-stopped cheating... B-But even so, it gave him a reason enough t-to not touch me when he wanted to..." I continued as more warm tears poured down my face.
"Until today... I-I let him, because he was giving me s-something I wanted... It w-was only fair..."
Red looked at me with a soft gaze, sympathy beaming in his vibrantly red eyes. "Shsh... No, no more. I won't let you say anything else. The burden of life is enough as is." He rested his forehead against mine gently, his eyes closing and our lips just inches apart.
I closed my eyes and continued to let my tears flow freely down my face. My breathing grew shallow and my heart raced from the unnerving anticipation.
"After everything I've put you through..." Our words began to collide with one another into the perfect mixture of a question.
"Why do you not hate me?"
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No Choice |Glitchy Red X Reader|
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