Shawn had somehow gotten into the room without waking me up and was fast asleep in the bed next to me. His arm was wrapped around my body, making it impossible for me to move.
I jumped awake and quickly looked at him. He hated being told what to do but last night was unacceptable. He had laid his hands on me while I was pregnant. I pushed his arm away and got out of bed. In the bathroom, there was this glass decorative pitcher and glass set. I filled it up with cold water and snuck back into the bedroom.
Standing next to Shawn, I looked like a child. There was no way I was going to physically get him out of bed. I proceeded to get up on the bed without spilling any water. I swiftly dumped the entire pitcher out onto his bare torso and head.
"What the fuck?" Shawn yelled, flying out of bed.
"Get out!" I yelled, pointing towards the door.
"What is up with you and water?" he screamed, getting in my face.
He slowly back away. I looked at him confused.
"I did that to you." I said, looking down at the floor.
My eyes wided. I ran over to the mirror. There were bruises and scratches on my neck, upper arms, wrist and legs.
"I didn't mean it!" said Shawn, running over to me and pulling me into a hug.
I tried to push him away but his strength was much greater than mine. He fell to his knees and put his head against my stomach.
"I'll never do anything ever again to hurt you or the baby." he pleaded. "You don't have to marry me. I just wanted to do the right thing."
I burst into tears. Being pregnant made me even more emotional. On top of everything, I was tired, sick to my stomach and had a doctors appointment in 45 minutes.
"I need to go." I sobbed.
"I'm going with." he demanded, holding onto my hand.
We both go dressed as fast as we could and rushed into the city to try and make it on time. I tried my best to wear items the covered the bruises and scrapes.
We got to the appointment and we told to sit and wait until the doctor was ready. Shawn held my hand, rubbing tiny circle with his thumb to comfort me.
"I don't think I can do this." I cried, resting my head on his shoulder.
"Everything is going to be fine. I promise."
A nurse finally came and took us back to get out first ultrasound. I laid on the table and waited for the doctor. Shawn sat nervously next to me.
"Hello Ms. Hutson and Mr. Mendes." the doctor greeted, stepping into the room.
Shawn and I both smiled awkwardly.
"Well let's have a look see at this little guy!"
The nurse prepared my stomach and dimmed the lights. The doctor used the machine and finally found a tiny speck.
"Looks like you're almost 5 weeks now."
Shawn held my hand as the doctor continued to run a few test.
"Melody, how old are you again?" the doctor asked, helping me sit up.
"I'll be 20 in May." I replied.
"Well you are in great health so I have no worries with you except premature birth. You yourself are a small woman. This may or may not happen so don't worry about it. We will take it one week at a time. The only thing I suggest is to not diet for until after the baby comes."
Shawn looked at me and laughed.
"She is such a health freak."
"From now on, no more dieting and only light exercise. We want you to maintain a healthy weight for the baby!"
I nodded in agreement. We scheduled another appointment at 3 months so that we could find out the sex and do a weight check.
The car ride home was extremely quiet. I felt like crying but knew if I did, I wouldn't be able to stop.
"What do you want to do for lunch?" Shawn asked, turning to look at me while stopped at a light.
"You can pick."
Shawn continued on. We pulled up to our building and had the car parked. He grabbed my hand and we hurried down the street to a little coffee shop and cafe. Shawn ordered us the usual as I sat at a table and waited. There were cameras outside snapping pictures and people inside who were starting to stare.
"Let's go." Shawn said, with bags in hand.
I grabbed his free hand and followed him outside. The crowds of people made it nearly impossible to walk freely anywhere. A man came between Shawn and I, forcing me to let get of Shawn. The man shoved his camera in my face, causing me stumble backwards in a panic.
"Excuse me, I need to get through!" I yelled, trying to push people away from me.
The amount of people caused my anxiety to go through the roof.
"Hey! Where's your engagement ring?" a man yelled, getting even more in my face.
"Move!" I screamed, pushing him away from me. "Don't you people get that I'm a human with feelings?"
Everyone slowly backed away from me. I was livid. Yes, most of these people were fans but the ones getting in my way were the scums who were trying to get a picture of us so that they could pay the water bill. I get it, it's a job for some people. But there is a limit to how far you can get into someones face.
I pushed past everyone and stomped down the street. Shawn quickly jogged behind to catch up. I got into the car and crossed my arms. Shawn had tried to start up a conversation but I quickly turned that down. Once we arrived home, I hurried inside and threw my shoes against the wall.
"I can't do this anymore."
"What do you mean 'this'?" Shawn asked, setting our food on the counter.
"Everything!" I yelled, pacing around the kitchen. "I'm 19 years old, engaged and pregnant! I can't leave my own house without being attacked by cameras! My career is over because of one stupid mistake I made!"
"Things will die down after everyone gets over the initial excitement." Shawn replied, comforting me.
"Don't." I sneered, pushing him away. "I can't deal with you anymore. One minute you're fine and the next you're shoving me around."
"I said I was sorry!" he yelled back.
"Oh so what? You can say you're sorry a million times and I'll never believe you!" I replied, crossing my arms.
"You've got to be kidding me!" started Shawn. "I know I have an anger issue but you are just as bad! You fly off the handle on me all the time! I've tried everything! I bought you a house, a car, that promise ring and then I propose to you, in front of millions of people, and you still are mad!"
"If you think that buying me expensive things is going to keep me around, then you must be crazy! I didn't ask for this life! You sucked me into it and now I'm stuck with an abusive fiance who is just going to cheat on me!"
"Who cheats on a pregnant woman? Do you even know how bad that would make me look?"
"Well go ahead and cheat on me! I'm leaving you anyways!" I screamed, grabbing a bowl of fruit off of the counter and throwing it in Shawn's direction.
I stomped away and started gathering my things.
"You're not taking my baby away from me!" he yelled, running after me.
Shawn quickly grabbed my arm and spun me towards him. He pulled me into a hug and held me tightly.
"You are not taking MY baby." he repeated.
"You're never going to see MY baby because I'm not having it." I shot back, trying to push him away.
Taking a step away from me, he finally let me go. How was I going to raise a child when I couldn't even walk down the street? How could this child live a normal life and be a kid with a set of parents who fought and beat each other? I was not bringing a baby into a broken home.
"You wouldn't." snarled Shawn.
I crossed my arms and looked out the hallway window.
"Melody. Seriously, you aren't actually going to."
Tears formed in my eyes as I turned back to face Shawn. I took a deep breath and put both of my hands on my stomach.
"Don't leave me." he begged.
"Don't hurt me anymore."
We started at each other in silence.
"Can we try and make this work? For real this time." blurted Shawn.
"I can't answer that."
"Why not?" he begged.
"We need serious counseling or I'm done."
