I feel lost like my whole body is empty. I wanna stop feeling and feel everything again. I want to live and to die. I want to love and hate. I want to understand how to survive... cause nothing feels right or wrong anymore. Because you left when I needed you the most cause you weren't there. I want to belong just for some time... Just to know that somewhere in this world someone loves me for who I am. That someone want me by his/her side. Just understand that I will be okay. Is it to much to ask? Just to belong. Cause I feel like everyone would be better off without me and i wish I could be off without me... like if I choose to press pause on my life. Press pause on my feelings just for some time, so I would understand what's happening. My body is like any mechanism, if it gets too many informations, it breaks and stop working. I felt too many things and my body decide to empty everything. And now I just feel lost cause I don't know how to feel love anymore or how to be happy. And the smiles on my face fade as my nights get shorter. And my eyes get darker as my dads comments get meaner. How can I escape this vicious circle. It's to dangerous for me right now, what if I died because I couldn't feel? What would happen if I could never love again... And I'm afraid to say no, afraid to forget how to say yes. I'm scared that I hate too much and that I can't love, that I stop caring so much people stop noticing... I'm scared of turning invisible after some time... because I'm not there with them anymore so it's gonna be easy for them to stop thinking about me...
Form a black bubble.
YOU ARE READING
Love, Lied and Lost...
RandomThis isn't a story, it isn't happy, it isn't sad... It's just plain me and no one else. I love writing and I just needed this book to write everything that I want to tell but that I have no one to. I don't want you to enjoy or to tell me can relate...
