i could love more

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LALISA,

good

/ɡʊd/

adjective

to be desired or approved of. Having the required qualities; of a high standard.

synonyms:fine, of high quality, of a high standard, quality, superior.

synonyms:fine, of high quality, of a high standard, quality, superior

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7:30 am Busan


Sleep.

And the importance of it.

-- apparently.

The crucial element to better living, kept younger looking, happier being, blah blah blah, and all that other bullshit.

Well guess what online gurus and overly searched insomnia pages, I haven't gotten a single drop of sleep and I feel -- fine.

Totally -- perfectly -- fine.

In fact, you know what, I feel the best I have in a long time. I should not sleep more often.

Yup, that's what I should do. Am going to do. Am doing from now - staying awake - sleeping more often - I mean not sleeping more often - so often? - wait - or is it sleeping less more....often? No, wait. Stay awake longer...then...sleeping?

That doesn't sound right.

Sleep more -

"Dude you look like shit"

"I know!" I crumble quick.

"I couldn't sleep at all last night, not for a second - " my God dam eyelids just wouldn't stay down.

I even begged - stay down, stay down. But the fuckers were persistent.

And awake.

Like the penis of some mommy's basement living, 30 year old son, who's granted the pleasure of touching "boobies" (as he would put it - or I guess, put them) for the first time.

It was up.

They were up. And staying up.

And -- shit.

Sorry -- that was a weird thought...

"...I'm...just tired"

"I can tell" my cousin studies me wearily. First my face (probably counting how many centimeters the bags under my eyes fall) then the rest, her eyes scanning me down and up and down...and up again.

"Are you - wearing that?"

I look to my carefully selected outfit and groan.

"What's wrong with this?"

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