patience

Chapter Seventeen

I don't know how, but I managed to avoid Shawn all day today. At least, I thought I did until I was backstage at the venue today. He saw me and waved. I turned and walked the other direction. He ran up behind me and caught my hand.

"Hey, what's up?" He asks. I pull away from his grip. 

"Nothing" I say. He could tell just by that that I was mad.

"You're lying" He says. I roll my eyes.

"Riv, what's wrong?" He asks. I turn my back and walk away. "River, what happened?".

"Nothing!" I shout back to him. He ran to catch up with me.

"Is this about last night?" He asks. I stay silent. "It is".

"In a way" I say.

"What way?".

"Nothing" I say.

"I don't get it. You told me you loved me and we...well, you know. Now you're avoiding me? Why?". He asks.

"Let's just say...Alessia finally told me your history" I say. His face goes blank.

"Oh" He says.

"Yeah" I say.

"Look, I can explain" He says. I laugh.

"Oh you don't need too, but I do have one question" I say.

"What?".

"Did you tell her you loved her right before you popped her too?" I ask and walk away not letting him respond.

***Alessia's POV***

I didn't want to perform today. I didn't want to do anything really. I felt horrible. River and I had never had something like this happened between us. I know that she said she wasn't mad, but something definitely wasn't right. I felt like I had failed her. If I could go back and not have given into Shawn, I would. I was so excited for River to come out and join me, but now it had turned into the worst time of my life. I would change it all again if I could. River didn't even come with me to the venue today. She always did that.

There was only 5 minutes until my set started. I was going to get in place when I saw River standing where she always did during shows.

"You...came?" I ask. She turned to face me. She was wearing my merch. I don't know why, but that warmed my heart.

"I always do, don't I?" She says. Her tine was cold, but I knew that was just her way of putting up a front. My heart was still broke though, because I knew that when she and I finally decided to talk about it, it would change things.

***River's POV***

Alessia seemed pleased when she saw that I was wearing her merch. I wish I knew how she was feeling. Heck, I wish I knew how I was feeling.

The whole time she was on stage, Shawn stood on the opposite side watching her. Actually, he was watching me. I wanted to go talk to him, but I couldn't. I couldn't face him knowing what he had done to Alessia. And the thing that sucked the most was the fact that he could be using me for the same thing. As much as I hated that he used Alessia, I'll be damned if he uses me.

***
Alessias set was almost over. She was about to sing 'Out of Love'. Just the thought of her singing the line 'When did you fall out of love with me?' hurt my heart.

The music started playing and she started singing. I started tearing up am when she started singing, and I wasn't the only one. I looked over and Shawn was wiping away tears from his cheek. But, it didn't end there either. Alessia got so choked up she stopped singing.

"I-I'm sorry, Canada. I just...I don't know if I can finish this song tonight" She says.  I could see her wiping away tears from her eyes now. "Instead, I just want to leave you all with some words from me if that's okay. The hest advice I can give to anyone is 'Be honest with the people you love'. I wasnt honest with someone very important to me and now I'm crying on stage. I love this person very, very much and I would give anything to go back and tell her the truth. I know shes here tonight backstage, well she might have left by now, but if not, River, I'm sorry and I love you".

Well, now my heart had been shattered again. She continued on talking and all I did was listen, but then Shawn walked over to me.

"Go out there" He says.

"I can't" I say. I wanted too, but I couldn't.

"Yes, you can. It's my tour and I say you can. Go" He says. For the first time in a few days I smiled. All my stage fright vanished as I ran out on the stage. The crowd cheered and Alessia turned to look at me. When she saw me, the tears started rolling again. I pulled her into me tighter than I ever had before.

"I'm so sorry" She says.

"No. I'm the one that's sorry" I say. She pulled away and brought the mic to her mouth.

"Everyone, say hello to my gorgeous cousin, River!" She yells. Her hand was wrapped around my waist clutching the fabric of my shirt in her hand. She was shaking so bad. She then stuck the mic up to my mouth.

"Hello, Canada" I say and wave. She smiled at me and hugged me again. I could almost drown out the screaming fans, but part of me didn't want too. This was a special moment, and it felt so good to have my bestfriend back.